How much do you answer to other people's children?

[lalasmama]

The short question is: How much do you answer to other people's children when they ask you a yes/no question?

Today's example isn't a one-time incident by any means... DD's daycare friend wanted DD to spend the night. I've already told her "not until at after school starts again" about 5 times this week and last week. She's whiny and begging each time I come to pick DD up. To be honest, it drives me batty. Taking care of her for the night is pretty time-intensive. This child has also made some poor choices lately, and we've told the girls there will be no overnights for now.

I'm trying not to be mean about it, but I just wanna tell the child "this isn't up for discussion" (like I would tell DD), but this child's mom is one of those great parents who would explain the denial, complete with an exact date of when her request will be approved. I'm not like that.

So, what would you do?

[MamaMolly]

Meh. I think I'd tell her that it wasn't up for discussion. My mom was the 'mean' mom who wouldn't put up with begging, pleading etc. my friends figured it out pretty quickly ;).

[infomama]

I would say, "sorry honey, the answer is no for now."

[rlu]

The standard "because I said so" may be applicable here. I'm the mean mom sometimes.

[JustMe]

I have no problem telling dc's friends simply that something is against my rules, that I don't allow it, that its not a good time for our family, without elaborating any more unless I think it would make sense for them to know the reason. This actually happens a lot because I tend to prohibit some of the things that their friends are allowed to do (video games, tv during the day, etc).

[brittone2]

I think it is okay to be firm at this point. "I know you really want to have a sleepover with DD. I gave you my answer the last time we talked about it" but it can be said with a smile.

If she persists I'd just cut it off with a "I'm sorry you don't like my answer, but my answer hasn't changed."

[MomToOne]

After I said no I'd probably deflect everything that follows with 'you have to talk to your mom about it'. Let her deal ;)