Moms with 3 kids close together age: how do you handle after school activities & nap?

[moonsky]

My DCs are 5.5 yrs, 3.5 yrs, and 18 months. DC#3 still naps in the afternoon but has stayed up and skipped the nap if we are out. DC1 really wants to do activities afterschool, i.e playdates, tennis, piano, etc. I solve the piano issue by having a private lesson at home. However, I can't have the private lesson for tennis, soccer and others at home. WWYD?

[crl]

So far dd, 23 months, naps around lunch time and is up by the time I need to transport ds anywhere. I have also arranged carpooling sometimes, which helps.

Catherine

[essnce629]

DS1 is 8 and DS2 is 2.

In order to be able to pick DS1 up from school at 2:40pm I have to make sure DS2 goes down for his nap at 11:30am. If he goes down much later than that I often end up waking him up to go pick up DS1 from school. DS2 only takes one nap a day so having swimming and soccer in the late afternoon/early evening doesn't interfere with DS2's nap schedule. We have swim lessons at 4:20 and 4:40pm one day, and 5:00 and 5:20pm on another day. Soccer practices and games are usually at 5pm and 6pm on weekdays and in the mornings on weekends.

We also do carpool so I only have to drive one-way each day. I drive to school 3 days a week and pick up 2 days a week. The days I don't do the afternoon pick-up I don't have to be so strict on making sure DS2 is asleep by 11:30am since DS1 is being brough home by his carpool.

[WatchingThemGrow]

We've done it a few ways. Last year, when #3 was still just a year old, I hired a teenage sitter to be home with both the 1yo and 3yo so I could take DD to ballet at 1:30. That was pricey, but it also gave ME a break to just sit outside the studio or run to the store by myself. My logic that was that it was unfair to 4yo DD that she couldn't do ballet just because her siblings needed a nap. This past year, with her K pickup at 2:30 (full day) #3 would have to go down for a nap as soon as #2 was picked up from preschool at 12:00. So, he now has the chance to sleep 12:05-2:00 until I grab him out of bed and toss him in the double stroller for the 20 min. walk to the school. One of the days we are home, #2 has a music class at 1:30, so on THOSE days, which were not also preschool days, I'd put #3 down for a nap by 11:30 and wake him by 1:15. Much more complicated than when we could just be home and let them sleep as long as they wanted!!!

[carolinamama]

DD is younger so still napping twice a day. Poor DD rarely gets the 2 naps she needs in her crib or for as long as she needs. But I have to pickup kids from preschool and K and get to activities. Thank goodness she is a laid back baby and goes with the flow. Yesterday she napped for 20 minutes in her carseat in the am running errands, a quick 10 minutes nap in the car on the way to take the boys to the dentist, and then had a 40 minute later afternoon nap in her crib to make it through until bedtime. I try as hard as I can to protect atleast one of her naps but sometimes, like yesterday, I just can't do it.

[crl]

Oh, I should have also said, we ony do one or two activities at a time. We do that for other reasons, but a side benefit is that our schedule is more flexible and less interfering with naps.

Catherine

[nfowife]

My 2 older kids are in 1st and half day pre-k (afternoon), at the same school. They take the bus home together and arrive home at 3:30. The bus drops them at our driveway. DD2 is 14 months and just recently transitioned to one nap. I drop DS at school at 12:40 and come home and put DD2 right down. She's waking up right around when the big kids get home. So if we need to go anywhere in the afternoon she's already up.
I do try to limit afterschool things though, because it gets too hectic with making dinner and having time to play and relax afterschool. DD does dance on Monday afternoons but I just drop her off and DH picks her up on his way home from work. Both big kids are starting soccer and practices are at 5:00 so it's going to be difficult when DH is out of town with dinner but we will make it work. Otherwise all of DS's activities (swim lessons at the Y and gymnastics) are in the mornings before he goes to school. It works out okay for us.

[maestramommy]

Last year when my kids were the same exact age as yours (lol), Dora was taking TKD 2 afternoons a week. I think Laurel's nap was done at the class time, but if it were not, I would be using my sitter time for that. In fact, when Dora switched to ballet that ended up at 1pm, naptime for both Arwyn and Laurel, I hired another sitter (my other one couldn't do this time) just to take Dora. This year Dora started out the school year with ballet late in the pm, so I used part of my sitter time to take her to ballet because there was no real waiting area for siblings.

It's not my preferred use of sitter time, but I do use it for that if necessary. Also, Dora and Arwyn are currently taking only ballet, and we switched schools, so now they are on Saturday mornings, one right after the other. We haven't added any other activities, partly because of this scenario. It's just too stressful.

[schrocat]

My kids are 6, 3 years 4 months and 17 months. DS 3 naps at noon while DS1 and 2 are at school. He's awake when I pick DS2 from preschool and send DS1 for his afterschool classes. Basically I do a drop off and DH picks him up from class after work.

[moonsky]

So far dd, 23 months, naps around lunch time and is up by the time I need to transport ds anywhere. I have also arranged carpooling sometimes, which helps.

Catherine

Carpool sounds good and another mom of DC's friend offers to help. However, Dh disapproved. So, this option is out.

[moonsky]

DS1 is 8 and DS2 is 2.

In order to be able to pick DS1 up from school at 2:40pm I have to make sure DS2 goes down for his nap at 11:30am. If he goes down much later than that I often end up waking him up to go pick up DS1 from school. DS2 only takes one nap a day so having swimming and soccer in the late afternoon/early evening doesn't interfere with DS2's nap schedule. We have swim lessons at 4:20 and 4:40pm one day, and 5:00 and 5:20pm on another day. Soccer practices and games are usually at 5pm and 6pm on weekdays and in the mornings on weekends.

We also do carpool so I only have to drive one-way each day. I drive to school 3 days a week and pick up 2 days a week. The days I don't do the afternoon pick-up I don't have to be so strict on making sure DS2 is asleep by 11:30am since DS1 is being brough home by his carpool.

Late afternoon classes may work. Did you find it difficult to get home and get dinner ready?

[moonsky]

Last year when my kids were the same exact age as yours (lol), Dora was taking TKD 2 afternoons a week. I think Laurel's nap was done at the class time, but if it were not, I would be using my sitter time for that. In fact, when Dora switched to ballet that ended up at 1pm, naptime for both Arwyn and Laurel, I hired another sitter (my other one couldn't do this time) just to take Dora. This year Dora started out the school year with ballet late in the pm, so I used part of my sitter time to take her to ballet because there was no real waiting area for siblings.

It's not my preferred use of sitter time, but I do use it for that if necessary. Also, Dora and Arwyn are currently taking only ballet, and we switched schools, so now they are on Saturday mornings, one right after the other. We haven't added any other activities, partly because of this scenario. It's just too stressful.

I mentioned the babysitter and got NO from Dh. He only wants his parents to watch the kids. But his parents can't really come every week in the afternoon.

[essnce629]

Late afternoon classes may work. Did you find it difficult to get home and get dinner ready?

Yes, it's difficult and I try to have leftovers available to eat on those days. There's just not enough time for me to actually cook something when we get home so late. I've tried to and even if it's something easy we end up eating super late since I'm constantly having to stop and break up the fighting between the kids, etc. Another option is making a crockpot meal and getting that ready in the morning. Tomorrow is swim day for us, which means we won't get home till around 5:30pm, so my plan right now is to make either soup or chili in the crockpot tomorrow morning.

[niccig]

Carpool sounds good and another mom of DC's friend offers to help. However, Dh disapproved. So, this option is out.


I mentioned the babysitter and got NO from Dh. He only wants his parents to watch the kids. But his parents can't really come every week in the afternoon.

Does your DH have any solutions to this? I could be wrong, but it's coming across as he's shooting down all your options. The options if carpooling and getting a sitter are out, are:

1. Youngest DC's nap is either missed or has to be timed to work with older kids activities - may mean less sleep or no sleep.
2. Older kid's activities have to be around the nap, which means they may not be able to do some things until youngest DC isn't napping.

Can DH take them to anything, or is all up to you to do? Carpooling and sitter are the 2 options that let the youngest nap and the oldest do their activities. Otherwise, one or other of them will miss out - this isn't necessarily the end of the world either. An occasional missed nap or delayed activity isn't going to give a lot of harm.

Late afternoon classes can be doable, it just depends on amount of homework, and it helps if you have dinner planned, so can walk in the house and it's ready.