How old were you when you had your first baby?

[maiaann]

I had DD1 at age 24. We were married the year before, at age 23, right after college. In this state (Colorado), that is considered very young. But, where I grew up (Kansas), getting married & having babies in your early twenties was typical. Are you the norm for where you live?

[keh602]

I had DD when I was 25. Interestingly, three of DH's siblings have kids, and they each turned 30 while they (or their spouse) was pregnant for the first time. DH was 26 when DD was born. So we were the young ones, even though we'd been married for 3.5 years at that point. Actually, I guess even compared to most of our friends we were pretty young. It didn't seem that way at the time though.

[hellokitty]

I was a few months shy of 31 with DS1. In our area now, it's old. Most ppl around here have their first baby before they are 26. In our moms club, I am one of the oldest moms, and I'm 39, we have some who are in their early 20's, and their kids are the same age as my youngest. There's a noticeable generation gap when we have conversations sometimes, lol.

[JoyNChrist]

21. That's not outside the norm where I live...I'd say 24 or 25 is probably the average.

ETA - I was married at 20 and we planned the pregnancy.

[♥ms.pacman♥]

i was 31 when i had DS. where i lived in Boston, in graduate school community, it was typical that most women had kids 28-35. Most ppl i knew waited until they got their PhDs and/or professional degrees before having kids.

though where i live now (Texas, suburbs) i feel like the oldest mom ever. There are some moms in my moms group who are 25 or so, and already have 2 or 3 kids. Most had kids right out of college and went back to school after having kids. I think there is maybe ONE mom in our group who is the same age as me (33).

I often remind myself not to compare to other moms for this reason. I know that I would be capable of doing WAAAY more stuff physically (stay up late, skip meals, etc) a decade or even 5 years ago. the physical strain of parenting young children seems to be so much harder when you get older.

[AnnieW625]

I had DD1 when I was 28 and 9 months old. We live in Sourhern California, about 30 minutes SE of Downtown LA. I think that mid to late 20s trends toward the younger side of dual income working families (at least they had dual incomes (DINKs) pre kids but now most of the ones I know now IRL are SAHMs vs. work outside of home moms) in my area. In DD1's class there is a mom who must have had her first (who is now 14 right out of high school) because I have a hard time believing she is a day over 32. There is another mom in the class who is 29 so she had her first at 23 or 24. Prior to this year the youngest person I have to have her first child was just 24 when she had her DD1; she expecting child #4 in October, and she is 31. I have a couple of cousins though who did have their first children at 24 yrs. old, and then another who had her first at 26. Two of the cousins are SAHMs, and the third is an officer in the Air Force. They don't live in my general area though (2 are 30 minutes away, and one is in Las Vegas), but I still think they were somewhat young when they had their first kids.

When I lived in Northern California (Sacramento area so completely different child raising age demographic than say the Silicon Valley or San Francisco) 28 was definitely pushing the older side, but in certain professional circles there was a demographic of yuppies who married later and waited to have kids longer, but in my home town area I knew people who got married right out of high school and had their first kids between the ages of 18-23. My mom had my little sister at 35 in 1987 and she said it was interesting talking with moms who had their first kids between 18 and 20. They weren't even born when my mon graduated high school. If I asked BIL he could probably tell you a couple of people whose first kids are in their early 20s now, and DNeph. is just a year old.

eta: in my close group of friends from Nor Cal we were the first to get married and to have kids. Out of the seven girls I lived with in college over a two year span (at different times) I was the second one to get married, and the second to have kids. We did have a friend though who got married the summer before our senior year because her boyfriend needed residency status. I don't think that marriage lasted, we lost touch after college. Wait now that I think about it one of my best friends did the same thing around the time we got married or right before. She had married her boyfriend who was from Africa to get him to the states and they were secretly married for a couple of years. I have never talked to her about it, my mom told me. I don't even think I told DH. We never met the guy.

[momof2girls]

I had just turned 28 three weeks prior to DD#1 being born. Was 30 with DD#2. I wanted to be done by 30 so it was all planned.

[DietCokeLover]

I was 36 when DD was born.

[ast96]

I was 27 with my first baby, which was young for where I lived at the time (Los Angeles). It's not young for where I live now. I am having my last baby at 37. And it's about time!

[american_mama]

It does vary by region but even more so by your social circle, and most especially by mother's education and income level. If you're in or planning to go to graduate school, a lot of women want to postpone marriage and/or kids at the least until the end of grad school and often until they are more established in their post-graduate jobs. Does anyone know if graduate school attendance, either in general or specifically for women, varies a lot regionally? Because then the two (more graduate school attendance and more older first-time moms) would go together in a region.

I was 31 and first of my closest friends to have kids, but I have a small social circle. I was living outside Washington DC. I moved to Minneapolis when I was 7 months pregnant and felt like most of the first-time moms I met at childbirth class, moms group, neighbors were similar in age to me.

[meggswife]

I was 17 with our first. He just turned 21. :) Our youngest is 15 months old. There is definitely a difference in having babies in your teens, twenties and thirties - pros and cons to each. I loved being a young mother, but I am much calmer now. ;)

[twowhat?]

It does vary by region but even more so by your social circle, and most especially by mother's education and income level. If you're in or planning to go to graduate school, a lot of women want to postpone marriage and/or kids at the least until the end of grad school and often until they are more established in their post-graduate jobs. Does anyone know if graduate school attendance, either in general or specifically for women, varies a lot regionally? Because then the two (more graduate school attendance and more older first-time moms) would go together in a region.

:yeahthat: I was 31 when I had the girls. Most of my friends were 30+ when they had theirs, for the exact reasons noted above.

[SnuggleBuggles]

I'm younger than most all of the other parents in the kids' school. I'm about 5-7 years younger than my peers that have same aged kids. They call me a baby...I secretly think they are old. ;) I'm in my 30s.

[JBaxter]

I was 24 with my first. Not to young around here. I was 41 with my last. I tell my boys not to even think about kids till they are 30. Looking back it was INSANE

[AnnieW625]

I'm younger than most all of the other parents in the kids' school. I'm about 5-7 years younger than my peers that have same aged kids. They call me a baby...I secretly think they are old. ;) I'm in my 30s.

:rotflmao: (at the secretly thinking they are old group!) This is DD1's entire school demographic, and most of my mommy group demographic. Before DD1 started school I never thought I had seen so many k-3 dads in one place that were pushing 48-55, and their wives aren't that much younger. DH who is 37 even thinks he is on the young side of dads there. In my mommy group I think the eldest member was born in 1968 or 1969 and there are only two of us born before 1977 and 1981; me and the soon to be mom of 4 who was born in 1981. Everyone else was born between 70-76. I honestly never thought I would be good friends with the mom of 4, but it has been nice having her around so I don't have to be the baby of the group.

[ha98ed14]

It does vary by region but even more so by your social circle, and most especially by mother's education and income level. If you're in or planning to go to graduate school, a lot of women want to postpone marriage and/or kids at the least until the end of grad school and often until they are more established in their post-graduate jobs. Does anyone know if graduate school attendance, either in general or specifically for women, varies a lot regionally? Because then the two (more graduate school attendance and more older first-time moms) would go together in a region.


This described me to a T. Married at 30; had DD at 32. I have a Master's that took me 2+ years as a full time grad student. Then several years of working before marriage and DD.

IME, and note that this is just my observation; I think that women who grow in the Northeast Corridor (DC Metro Area to Boston Metro Area) are much more likely to go to graduate school than people where I live now (SoCal). Here, people are much more entrepreneurial. Many more people go into business for themselves here than my circle in the NE. In fact, I know no one who started their own businesses in the NE.

[Smillow]

42. I married @ 34, m/c @ 37 and it took that long to get pg again. Age, travel schedules and thyroid issues were working against us!

[maestramommy]

2 months shy of 37 when Dora was born.

[edurnemk]

I had just turned 29 when we had DS, I got married at 25. For both things I was sorta young by the standards of our region and circle, we were the first to get married and the first to have a baby in our circles. Many friends followed by 1-3 years, and most our friends had their first baby at 30+. I remember at our childbirth class we felt like kids, because we were the only ones under 30.

[Mopey]

Married at 31, having Mopey (sometime VERY soon!) at 34. Here in NYC we do tend to be over-educated and work/enjoy marriage for longer, and take longer to find partners than elsewhere it seems. It is crazy to me that my DN's have grandparents quite a bit younger than my parents. Definitely very different in different areas.

I am glad for my age though, for all the fun, traveling and freedom I've had, the chance to be married and to start my own successful business. I see others who started mid-20's and it seems they will never be able to give their kids all they want to because they never gave themselves time to develop. Don't mean to insult anyone at all btw! Just my observation.

[wencit]

I was 2 weeks shy of 31 when DS1 was born. Definitely on the younger side for my social circle, many of whom have postgrad degrees of some kind. I'm turning 37 this year, and most of my friends are just starting to have their babies. Maybe my kids have worn me down over the years, but I just can't imagine having the energy right now to deal with that! I'm very happy with our timing.

[DualvansMommy]

I was 34 when I had DS, which is average in my area. Most other moms I know had their kids from 29-37 range. Back home is a different story though, most started young at 22-25 years old and stopped with one child, or continued with more kids, but at much older age in early 30's.


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I am here: http://tapatalk.com/map.php?w31k2b

[SnuggleBuggles]

Married at 31, having Mopey (sometime VERY soon!) at 34. Here in NYC we do tend to be over-educated and work/enjoy marriage for longer, and take longer to find partners than elsewhere it seems. It is crazy to me that my DN's have grandparents quite a bit younger than my parents. Definitely very different in different areas.

I am glad for my age though, for all the fun, traveling and freedom I've had, the chance to be married and to start my own successful business. I see others who started mid-20's and it seems they will never be able to give their kids all they want to because they never gave themselves time to develop. Don't mean to insult anyone at all btw! Just my observation.

never mind :)

[soontobe]

I got married at 20 and had ds at 21 which was perfectly normal in our social circles. Dh was 23 when we had ds

[bigsis]

I was 30 when I had DD. At the time, it felt like I was one of the older moms. But once I became a mom, I was surrounded by older moms or moms who had kids around the same age as me. I'm in the suburbs of L.A.

[ilfaith]

I was six weeks shy of 35 when DS1 was born (just missed that AMA label). I had DS2 at 37 and DS3 was born a month before my 40th birthday. My friends back home in New York and New Jersey mostly started their families in their early to mid 30s. In Florida I see a lot more younger parents. But at my boys' school I would say most of the parents are around our age.

DS does alumni interviews for his alma mater, and we realize that, at 45, he now is older than some of the parents of the high school seniors he is interviewing. We joke that we could be our kids grandparents around here.

[ourbabygirl]

I'm in the midwest, and I had my first at 29, and my second at 31. It's funny, I remember being bored in grad school one night and writing out in my notebook how I could do the timing of having kids, if I had 4 and they were all 2-3 years apart. At the time I was probably 25 and thought I could have my first at 27, then 29, 31, and 33 to for sure be done before the dreaded "Advanced Maternal Age" of 35. :ROTFLMAO:

So I finished grad school and worked a few more years, and it took longer than I thought to get pregnant, so I had my first at 29. I figured I was still good 'cuz I could have the second at 31, then 33, and my last one at 35. Well, DD was quite a handful and parenting was a huge shock to my and DH's system, so we decided we could *maybe* handle one more. DS came along sooner than I would have planned, and we're probably 99% sure we're done with 2 kids. :)

The people I grew up with (slightly rural area, about an hour from the big metro area where I live now) mostly started having kids right out of high school, and many of them are done with their families now at age 32-33 (with 2 or 3 kids, though I have a couple of FB friends from there with 5!). Of the people I went to school with at the private high school that I transferred to (in the metro area), probably half of my class or fewer is married and has kids. Tons of my FB friends from that school are still single, though the ones who are are mainly in jobs that took more schooling (law, medicine, etc.).

It's interesting, and I'm glad I'm in the spot I'm in, though if I could do it over, I'd spend the 4 years of married life pre-kids doing much more traveling with DH. I'm really bummed that it'll never be the same and we'll need to take the kids on all our vacations now, which won't really be 'vacations,' but will just be 'trips.' ;) Sorry- got off on a tangent!

[mjs64]

Pregnant at 30, had DS at 31. But I feel like an almost embarrassingly young mom in my community, where most have professional degrees, as ms. Pacman puts it:


i was 31 when i had DS. where i lived in Boston, in graduate school community, it was typical that most women had kids 28-35. Most ppl i knew waited until they got their PhDs and/or professional degrees before having kids.

I'm finishing my PhD. Most women in my field finish before kids and have them well into their 30s. Many don't have kids at all. At the daycare center (affiliated with the uni) I feel like I don't fit in--I'm way younger than other moms.

[GaPeach_in_Ca]

I had older DS when I was 27. I live in Silicon Valley. It feels very young for this area in the circles we are in. Most of my son's friend's parents were mid to late 30s when they had their kids. I have a graduate degree, as does DH.

[vludmilla]

31 with DD. I am now 36 and trying to have a 2nd DC.

[Indianamom2]

I was 25, a couple months shy of 26 when DD was born. I was 30 when Ds was born. I'd say I was fairly normal for my area.

[anonomom]

I turned 30 while I was pregnant with DD1. By that point, DH and I had been married for 7 years, but there were some very specific benchmarks we wanted to meet (financially and professionally) before we had kids.

Most of the moms I know IRL were between 28-32 when they had their first kids. That seems to be roughly the norm around here.

[megs4413]

I was 21 for the first and 23 for the last. Pretty young for my area at the time and REALLY young for the area we live in now. The next youngest mom in my circle of friends is six years older than me.

[nfowife]

Among my friends, I was the first to get married at 24. But, DH is a military officer and among his group most everyone got married in the first 2-3 years after college it seemed.

[elephantmeg]

I was 25, almost 26. Married at almost 21

[crl]

I have a law degree. Ds was born when I was 33, but I became his mother when we adopted him at 13.5 months and I was 34 then. Not unusal for female lawyers, ime, who often try to get through law school and work for a bit before having kids, though we had started trying a few years before. I lived in the DC metro area at the time.

Catherine

[Green_Tea]

DD1 was born 10 days before I turned 28. We lived in Boston at the time, and I knew several other moms who were between 28-32. Now we live in another part of NE, and I am considered a "young" mom (at 37!).

I was already in grad school when DD was born, and finished when she was 15 months old. At that point I was 6 months pregnant with DD2 - good thing those graduation gowns are loose and flowy!

[hillview]

34 and 36. DH and I got married when I was 32.

[mom3boys]

Pregnant at 30, had DS at 31. But I feel like an almost embarrassingly young mom in my community, where most have professional degrees, as ms. Pacman puts it:



I'm finishing my PhD. Most women in my field finish before kids and have them well into their 30s. Many don't have kids at all. At the daycare center (affiliated with the uni) I feel like I don't fit in--I'm way younger than other moms.

:yeahthat:

Exact same with me. Had DS1 at 31, DS2 a couple weeks after I turned 33. More than one of the women in my university noted that I "had my kids young". Then DS3 came along and I was 36 when he was born and no one said I was young any more, and I certainly felt old during that pregnancy! No one in my close circle of friends from college had a kid before age 30. Lots of my friends were pregnant with #1 or 2 when I was pg with #3. We live in the NYC area, and I am in academia in a medical field. Most women have kids in their thirties and there were definitely some "older looking" women using the pumping room at my graduate school.

However, most people I know from high school had them earlier. Same with DH's friends (DH is from the midwest). Also, in our neighborhood there are some VERY young looking parents (low income urban area). When DS1 was in T-ball last year, at age 4, I think my DH could have been the dad of some of the other kids' Dads--they appeared to be in their early 20's, with a child at least age 4. DH's friend from high school became a grandpa at age 43, same age DH was when we had DS3. (DH is 7 years older than me, so he was 38,40, and 43 when the kids were born).

[WatchingThemGrow]

I was 35 when DD was born, which is probably a couple years older than the norm here, but not by much. We're in an academic area where many people (like 41%) have graduate or professional degrees. I was shocked when moving here to teach revealed all these old parents. Now I'm one of 'em!

Granted, we do have gobs of moms 10 years younger than me. A few are older.

[daisymommy]

I was married at 21, and had my first baby at 27. I felt like I was so old to have waited that long! All of my friends already had 1-2 babies by then. My mom had me at 26, so I felt like there was something wrong with me to have DS so "late." In reality, we waited several years to begin TTC, and then it took another 2 years of infertility to have DS.

In then end, the timing was perfect when we finally did have him (financially, maturity wise, being tired or working, being in our first home, etc.)

Everyone I knew, as well as myself, said we all wanted to be done having babies by the age of 35 when you start becoming higher risk health wise. I'll say that it never occurred to me to start having babies in my 30's. It's interesting people, social circles, and areas of the country can be so different.

[Beth24]

I was 32 with my first. 34 with number 2, 37 with number 3 and 45 with my last. I live in Southern California and am definitely in the normal range for age of first child. I am a lawyer and worked for 8 years before having kids. Having a baby at 45 has been a different experience entirely. Talk about AMA!

[MontrealMum]

I had DS at 36. Although that's older than the average for the area I live in - and the area I come from originally - it's within the normal range for my social circle and peers which seems to be 30-40. Like many of them we waited because I was in graduate school. People are always shocked to find out how old I am because I look young for my age and have such a young DS.

[lalasmama]

I need an "other"! Hee hee hee.

DD was born when I was 24, however, I was 28 when she came to live with me.

Generally, our area has a wide range. We have a fair amount of "older" moms, but we also have a lot of teen moms too. I feel like I'm an "older" mother, but I know I'm not. ... even when the new baby comes (I'll be 33).

Funny enough, growing up, my parents were definitely "older". However, I think, for their generation, marrying your HS sweetheart and starting a family immediately was pretty expected/normal, so my friends' parents had them in their really late teens/early 20s. My mom adopted me as an infant when she was 30. My BFF's mom had her at 17 (and, yes, her mom was married), so the 13 year age difference was really noticeable to me growing up. Her mom was young, "hip", cool. And my mom was... well, my mom was in her late 40s when I graduated, but was always sickly (which, I think, made the age difference even more stark to me).

I will admit that I was slightly jealous when the above BFF met her future husband at 19, got married at 19, and had her first baby at 20. For many many years, I assumed something was "wrong" with me, because here she was having babies, buying a home, being a housewife, and I couldn't settle on a boy to "settle down with", let alone marry and (purposely) have kids! That being said, BFF did marriage, kids, trade school, divorce. I did dating, common-law marriage (with a step-son) while I was in school then seperated, and then continued in school when DD came along... and now, I want more kids, and there's another one on the way, and I'm also working on my master's degree, because I can't imagine "not" doing it. (Hope that makes sense.) While I have at times felt "young" around my cohort at school, at PTA meetings, I'm right in the middle of the age group. I'm also right in the middle of the education levels....

[essnce629]

I was 22 and the first in my group of best friends to have a baby. I would be considered young. My two best friends had their firsts at 25 years old and my 3rd best friend was 26. I think between 26 and 30 is the norm for those I grew up with as most of my high school friends on FB have had at least one child by now or are pregnant with their first. I'm 30.

In my MOMS Club playgroup that I attend weekly I'm the youngest mom by about a decade! Most of the moms are 38-42 years old it seems. It's also weird that not only am I the youngest mom, but I also have the oldest child as DS1 is 8 1/2. Their oldest kids are DS2's age-- 2 years old. Many of the moms in my MOMS Club have had fertility problems and multiple miscarriages though, and I think they would have preferred to have started having kids earlier. So I'm considered a young mom when it comes to DS2, but a super young mom when it comes to DS1!

[kijip]

I was a few weeks shy of 23. In Seattle in my social/educational level scene that was basically considered on par with a teen pregnancy despite the fact that we were married when I got pregnant and while moderate income for our area we were comfortable enough to not need or be eligible for social services and had great private health insurance. Because of our ages, the hospital social workers kept popping up and getting really pushy with the WIC applications and charity care waivers and such. It was pretty funny- they were convinced we needed some sort of financial help.

I think the norm varies more by city size and area than by state and I think housing prices and educational levels are correlated. If I went further to the south of Seattle or north of the city where housing was cheap, there were many other parents within a few years of my age and who had similar college education backgrounds. If I stayed in the city MOST of the other parents my age were single and/or not high school grads or college educated. Most of the new parents with college degrees I knew in the city were closer to 40 than 30. There were a decent number of folks around 30, but closer to 40 was (is) really common. I really think that this is because the people buying houses in the city generally have to be much more financially comfortable than 20 somethings are likely to be. While we were the first in our age peer group to have a baby, all of the others who had babies by the time they were 30 did so just after moving to a less expensive burb. I met a few my age who were college educated and/or married but VERY few.

I really think that parenting can work for different people in a wide range of life's seasons and we developed friendships with parents of a wide range of ages and economic levels. I will admit it 2 things did get old/annoy me:

1. for 35+ moms and dads to see me with T as a happy chubby babe and say "I just never could have done it at your age." That is fine, that is you. Glad you had a baby at a time that worked for you. However, THIS is not you, it is me/us and we are doing it/living it. The fact that you could not/did not it irrelevant to the fact that we are.

2. MANY park visits came with people, usually older moms headed back to work after maternity leave, trying to hire me to be their nanny because they saw how hands on I was with T and assumed that I worked for his parents. Nope, I am the parent, people. I have no interest in quitting my job and schooling to be your child's nanny. I would never assume that you are your child's grandmother so let's agree not to assume that any under 25 yo woman with a baby in a park is the nanny. FWIW, I can guarantee you that were this not my baby, I would not be as enamored of him. Sorry. I am just trying to be a good mom. I trust that I would be a sucky nanny because I really am not all that fond of babies in general. :bag

I am now 31 and most of my high school friends from my actual school (very academically focused magnet) do not have babies. I can think of 1 who had a kid at 19 and then I can think of 3-4 more that had kids between ages 24-30. Many are now married and feel they can't afford to have kids because of student loans and housing issues. Others are not married. My old friends with babies are from church camp mostly and are living in the burbs. They most often got married at 22-25 and first baby was when they were 25-28. I can only think of a few church camp friends who do not have kids yet. My church camp was as large as my high school. My same age husband's high school buddies do mostly all have kids now but that reinforces the cost of living thing as my husband comes fro Eastern WA and housing is cheap there.

[klwa]

I was 29 and DH was 30 when DS was born. We got married when we were both 23, so it was several years before we started trying to have kids. DD was born when I was 32 & DH was 33 & this one will be when I'm 36 & DH is 37.

[katerinasmom]

I voted 30-34. Technically I was 29 - four days shy of my 30th birthday. But she was actually due 10 days later so for the sake of your poll I voted 30-34.

[MelissaTC]

I was 27 and that was with the use of fertility treatments. I can't imagine what would have happened if we waited, given my issues. DH was 28 and was working and doing a grad program pt. I just have my BA.

Most of the parents at school are 5-10 years older than us. We are 3-10 years younger than those in our social circle. Most people around here are first time parents in their 30's so we were on the younger side. When we finally get our adoption referral, we will still be in the range for around here, albeit towards the older end.

[AnnieW625]

Everyone I knew, as well as myself, said we all wanted to be done having babies by the age of 35 when you start becoming higher risk health wise. I'll say that it never occurred to me to start having babies in my 30's. It's interesting people, social circles, and areas of the country can be so different.

This was me too once I met DH and knew I wanted to get married and raise children with him. I set a goal that I wanted to be done having children by the time I turned 32 so I would be 50 the year the youngest one graduated from high school. I turned 33 two months after I had DD2, and by just a couple of weeks I'll still be 50 when she graduated from high school.

[lizzywednesday]

I was 31 almost 32 when DD was born. If we have another, I'll be 35 or older. (I'm not looking forward to the additional monitoring that comes with a 35+ y/o pregnancy, but I figure they're going to monitor me closely anyway due to DD's heart defect.)

I married "late" in some circles (I was 29) but right on time for people in our circles.

This is different from both DH's and my parents' experience - DH's parents were married at 21, parents at 23; my parents were married at 21(mom) & 23(dad) and parents by 23 & 25.

By a funny set of coincidences, my sister and I had our first babies at the ages our mom was when she had me (23 - but it was my sister who was 23) and when she had my sister (31 - and it was me at 31.)

[maestramommy]

2 months shy of 37 when Dora was born.


I've read all the responses, and I see that I'm one of the older ones. Just wanted to say I've never known if this is a function of region or education. My family moved all over when I was little, but I say I'm from the midwest, as we finally settled in Chicago when I was 9, and that's where I went to college and grad school. Now THAT was a function of parenting, our parents wanted us to finish schooling before getting married. And a masters is only two extra years. After that, having kids so late wasn't so much a deliberate decision as circumstance. I didn't meet dh until I was 32, we got married when I was 34. I was the oldest in my social circle to get married and have kids. Then we DID wait because our courtship was rather short, and we really wanted that time alone together before the kids came. There was no family history of fertility issues, and it wasn't something we worried about. Looking back, maybe one could say we were extremely lucky because having babies was never a problem (in fact, the almost opposite!). I never realized that fertility was such an issue for older women until I became a mother myself. :grouphug:

Still, if dh and I had met 10 years earlier and actually gotten married, maybe it would've been better. I'm so danged tired:p, and I know it's partly a function of age. At the same time, I was a lot more self-confident and happy in my own skin in my 30s than my 20s, so it probably all worked out for the best.

[swissair81]

I was a month post my 22nd birthday when I had DD1. I got married a month before my 21st birthday which is pretty average for my community.

When DD1 was born, my divorce had just become final a few weeks before and someone from the Parenting Program at my hospital brought me a pamphlet on teen parenting. I was so angry, I don't think I had a single word to say to her.

[khalloc]

I got married at 25. Had my first child a few months shy of turning 28. I think it was perfect. but in retrospect I wouldnt have minded having a few more childless years. I had my son at age 30. I think overall the timeframe was good.

I think I was about average. I see some people who have kids really young and never go to college, or are scrambling to save for a house when they already have kids. DH and I bought our first house before we were married and I was 23.

OTOH, lots of people have babies in their late 30s or 40s. So everyone is different. I'm glad I'm not in my late 30's having kids though. I think it would have been OK to start having kids at like 31 and maybe finish by 33 or 34 though. But I've had my 2 and I'm done!

[LarsMal]

I turned 28 2 months after DS was born. I went on to have 3 kids in 3.5 years!

[boolady]

32 years, 10 months.

[StantonHyde]

Am I the norm for where I live??? :hysterical::hysterical::hysterical:

I live in Utah. Women my age are grandmothers--I get asked if I am DD's grandmother. Fortunately, in my group of friends, I am just on the outer edge of normal. (first baby at 37 and second/last at 40)

[mom3boys]

I think it would have been OK to start having kids at like 31 and maybe finish by 33 or 34 though. But I've had my 2 and I'm done!

I thought my timing was perfect--DS1 at 31 and DS2 at 33 :) --Then came DS3, oops!

[jk3]

I was 28.

[BabbyO]

I was 18 with my first. I gave him up for adoption to give both he and I a better start. I went to college and met DH. We got married when I was 27 and I had DS1 when I was 33.

They are both my first. First pregnancy = 18, first child to raise = 32

ETA: I don't think I'm the norm anywhere, or maybe I'm the norm in several places???

[smiles33]

I had DD 5 months before my 30th birthday. We were the first of our friends to get married when I was 26, as all our friends also went to professional school. Heck, one of DH's dental school friends is getting married later this year, at nearly 40, because she's been so focused on building her dental practice. It's just tough to nurture a relationship, let alone start a family when you go through a grueling advanced degree and then start up a business!

[erosenst]

43 - I skew the average in any discussion like this!

Married for the first time at 42. Tried on our own for a few months, then m/c after IUI. One more IUI (unsuccessful) and the one (successful) IVF.

I *think* I can still count on one hand how many times I've been asked about my (now 8 yr old) "grand"daughter.

And for the record, I'm 99% sure I'm a much better mom now than I would have been 20 years ago.

[queenmama]

I got married at 21 and Henry was born 20 months later, just a few months shy of my 23rd birthday.

I turned 34 just after learning I was pregnant with this baby. We are the youngest parents -- by far -- among Henry's classmates, and are now at the ages those same parents had those kids 12 years ago.

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