It doesn't matter right?

[MSWR0319]

So I just got back from my 38 week check up. DH is all cranky because I didn't ask if I'm dilated. He was sitting right there in the room, he could have asked. I didn't ask because it doesn't really matter as far as I know, right? I know people who sat at 4 cm for weeks and others who went from nothing to a baby in a day. I didn't even get checked with DS because I was going to a midwife. This time I'm seeing an OB, so this is my second check. Last week there was nothing happening. DH has made me feel upset now like I did something wrong by not asking and the dr did something wrong by not telling. I don't think that was DH's intention but geez. Now I'm gonna have a crappy rest of the day. Hormones at work I guess!!

[infocrazy]

DS1 not dilated hardly at all, Dr told me I'd probably be late, went into labor the next day (3 days early).

DS2/DD dilated to 3+ by 37 weeks, Dr always thought I'd go soon, they were both 3 days late...

[SnuggleBuggles]

I didn't get checked ds2 bc the info is so meaningless. Sorry your dh doesn't get it!

[BDKmom]

I don't think it matters, and I think if anything were happening the Dr would have told you without you asking. My guess is nothing has changed.

Even with an OB, I don't plan on being checked this time unless there is a REALLY good reason.

[edurnemk]

With DS my OB told me it was unlikely I'd go into labor in the next 2 weeks, since there was no cervical change. I never made it to my next appointment. IMO it doesn't matter or predict when labor will start.

[AnnieW625]

With DD1 I was measured at 37 weeks and I was 4/1/2 cm. dialated. I had her 4 days later, but I could have gone into labor in my OB's words that day or in two weeks. It freaked me out a bit that I thought the BH contractions were the real thing and then once I was the hospital everyone was convinced my labor was stalled, but after my water was broken I had DD1 eight hours later with the help of pitocin.

With DD2 at 38 weeks 6 days I was barely dialated, I had my membranes sweeped and my water broke at home 8 hrs. later. I was 1 cm dialated when I went to the hospital. I had her without the help of pitocin 8 hrs. later.

So now I don't think it matters, imho unless you are 40 weeks+ I don't think how little dialated you are or how very dialated you are matters much. The baby will come when it is ready (I think I really learned that with DD1).

[mikala]

I read a great blog post on this a few weeks ago. Hope it makes you feel better!

http://birthingbeautifulideas.com/?p=1875

[Philly Mom]

At 37 weeks, I was told the baby was not coming anytime soon. Water broke two days later, and I was 4 cm by the time I got to the hospital.

[BabyBearsMom]

Nope doesn't matter. The baby will come when it comes. Unless you have an upcoming inducement or reason to worry, it doesn't matter a bit

[MSWR0319]

TMI, but I just went to the bathroom and my panty liner was brown. I'm assuming it's from the cervical check right?

[SnuggleBuggles]

Very likely. Brown= old blood.

[sntm]

Just came from my checkup and the MW did a cervical check just because I was mildly concerned with SO out of town. She said the same - women can sit at 4 cm dilated for weeks, but lack of dilation is somewhat reassuring unless I were to have another major bout of contractions like I did last week. Still not very predictive at all.

ETA: I think it's just something people think they should know. Men in particular like data points, regardless of their significance.

[truly scrumptious]

ETA: I think it's just something people think they should know. Men in particular like data points, regardless of their significance.

Totally agree. Makes them feel like they have some control over the uncontrollable. OP, maybe you can find some statistic for your DH like the percentage of women who don't ask about dilation at appointments and still go into labor just fine... ;)
Good luck! Hope you manage to stay comfortable these past weeks and have a smooth delivery!

[swissair81]

I have every intention of asking my OB not to check me in my 9th month. It doesn't help anyway. My earliest baby (36 weeks 5 days) was born 5 hours after a cervical check that showed my cervix was long & thick and the baby was high.

[daisymommy]

I agree with everyone else--dilation now has no bearing on when you will deliver. You aren't like a car with a gas gage or something ;)

With all of my babies, I sit at 5cm. for close to a month. Seriously! And if a doctor didn't know better, they would rush me to the hospital thinking the baby was coming. But that's just what my body does.

Having checks pre-labor also sets you up for frustration, when you think you are dilated, so therefor labor should start, and then it doesn't. Or on the flip side, you aren't dilated, so you're frustrated and feeling huge, and then boom, you're in labor the next day!

Also, every time you get a cervical check, you risk infection, and the possibility of premature-rupture-of-membranes (PROM). This means you are now having your baby prematurely, on the clock countdown, makes for a harder labor on baby (due to no cushioning for him, contractions are more intense), and more painful to you too. There is also the possibility of a cord prolapse and decreased oxygen, if baby wasn't low enough to start with when your water broke.

So, all in all, you did the right thing!

[Liziz]

Wait, so the OB did a cervical check and you just forgot to ask how dilated, or you didn't request a cervical check, and therefore don't know?

Either way, I totally agree that it doesn't matter -- I was barely a centimeter and 80% effaced starting at 36 weeks, and went into labor 3 days before my due date.

But -- I interpreted your post to say that the OB did do a cervical check, but just didn't tell you the findings. If that's the case and it's really bugging you, call the office -- there's a good chance it's in your doc's note from your visit. I had a similar experience with something else, and I felt crazy, but called anyways, and the nurse who called me back was able to find the answer really quickly for me.

[brittone2]

With my first, I was 3-4 cm dilated and 70-80 percent effaced for 3 weeks, with lots of contractions in my back during that time. Those contractions hurt more than my actual active labor contractions.

With DD, I didn't want any cervical checks but had a mw appt on my EDD and they kind of pressured me to get a cervical check. I was maybe 1 cm dilated. Not really encouraging. The next evening it was DH and my anniversary, and we went to a birth art exhibit after going out to dinner. I kept joking all that birth energy was going to help things move along ;) I went into labor the following day with DD, and fwiw, I was only in labor for 3 hours. So I apparently moved pretty quickly from that 1 cm.

With DS2 I switched to a HB MW and requested no cervical checks in advance. The only cervical check I had was when I was in active labor and the mw showed up and checked me at that point. I didn't have any more checks telling me I was "complete" or anything else.

[MSWR0319]

Wait, so the OB did a cervical check and you just forgot to ask how dilated, or you didn't request a cervical check, and therefore don't know?

Either way, I totally agree that it doesn't matter -- I was barely a centimeter and 80% effaced starting at 36 weeks, and went into labor 3 days before my due date.

But -- I interpreted your post to say that the OB did do a cervical check, but just didn't tell you the findings. If that's the case and it's really bugging you, call the office -- there's a good chance it's in your doc's note from your visit. I had a similar experience with something else, and I felt crazy, but called anyways, and the nurse who called me back was able to find the answer really quickly for me.

You're right. They did check me but I didn't ask. I really don't care which is why I didn't ask. He was checking because the possibility of induction dueto some complications I had with DS. DH was the one dying to know how far I had progressed. I'll tell DH he can call and ask if he's that concerned!

[mommytoC]

I'd guess that if you were anything more than 2 cm, the doctor would have said...

I've only had cervical checks in active labor. DD#1 was born at 37+ weeks, and DD#2 at 39+ weeks. My OB asked if I wanted to be checked at my 39 week visit with DD#2, but I declined.

[mikala]

You're right. They did check me but I didn't ask. I really don't care which is why I didn't ask. He was checking because the possibility of induction dueto some complications I had with DS. DH was the one dying to know how far I had progressed. I'll tell DH he can call and ask if he's that concerned!

If they are talking induction the full Bishop's score is probably more relevant than that one number anyway. The blog post I referenced above has more Bishop's score info.

Hope you're hanging in there today and this baby decides to make an appropriate exit soon!

[AnnieW625]

Or on the flip side, you aren't dilated, so you're frustrated and feeling huge, and then boom, you're in labor the next day!

This is what happened to me with DD2, but I don't recall being frustrated about not having the baby yet; just tired, and big, but I think the dr. thought I was wondering why I hadn't had the baby yet as I was almost 39 weeks. He had told me the week prior he'd check to see if I was dialated and I agreed to that, but then when he did the check it hurt like hell (I just thought it was his large hands) and I later found out while checking my medical records online it said he had stripped my membranes. I really liked my dr. though and in the end things worked out fine, but if I were having more kids I'd probably just forgo the cervical check.

[BabyBearsMom]

Wanted to add a "definitely doesn't matter" personal experience. I got checked at my mudwife's on Tuesday showing no progress, still just 2cm. I was mentally prepared for a c-section on Friday. Woke up in labor on Wednesday and went from 2cm to 10cm in 10 hours. So seriously, those checks only tell you where you are at that exact moment.

ITA that men need statistics to manage child birth though. My DH was super focused on my contraction timing because it gave him something that he could understand in a crazy time.

[mctlaw]

I just read this post and realized you are the same poster whose DH won't tell his parents not to show up at the hospital! What is he doing pressuring you about this when he can't do his part. Frankly, in your shoes, I wouldn't tell him anything about my cervix, because I'd be afraid he'd be passing the news straight to MIL!!!

[MSWR0319]

I just read this post and realized you are the same poster whose DH won't tell his parents not to show up at the hospital! What is he doing pressuring you about this when he can't do his part. Frankly, in your shoes, I wouldn't tell him anything about my cervix, because I'd be afraid he'd be passing the news straight to MIL!!!

Yep! That's me. Also the same poster who's MIL just informed her she's got the whole month cleared so she can come and the same poster who's SIL, BIL, and DN are showing up for a week two weeks after my due date. ahhhhhhhhh!!! Luckily I don't think DH will say anything about my cervix to MIL because he's uncomfortable talking about things like that to other people. Now I just have to force him to call MIL and tell her when she's welcome and when she's not. That will be happening tonight.

[Liziz]

about things like that to other people. Now I just have to force him to call MIL and tell her when she's welcome and when she's not. That will be happening tonight.

Good luck!!!!

[wendibird22]

Add me to the "it doesn't matter" list. With DD1 I was 2cm at ~37wks. DD1 was 9 days late after being induced. The number is just a number and means nothing if you aren't actively in labor AFAIK.

Best of luck to you with your DH and all the other issues with the ILs.