Did you tell the name/sex of your child?

[katydid1971]

When you were expecting did you find out the sex? Did you tell? Did you keep it a secret? What about the name, did you let people know ahead or wait until the baby was born. Just curious.

[maestramommy]

We did find out the sex, and we did tell people. Not so with the name, since we didn't decide on names until after each was born. We did have a short list though, and I did share it with some people.

[Simon]

Shared sex, never name.

[teedeedee]

We didn't find out the gender of either of ours so telling that wasn't even an option. I bounced a few name ideas off close friends, but once we chose a name, we always kept it to ourselves. It was a lot of fun our babies were born! =)

[codex57]

We found out and told.

It helps with the planning. If people know, they're not stuck giving gender neutral gifts, they start looking for appropriate hand me downs, etc.

I'm totally fine with people wanting it to be a surprise. I'm fine with, but have a less positive attitude towards people trying to force a gender neutral childhood (I get why they want to do it, just don't think it's that realistic or that the alternative is really so horrible that you'd need to go through all that effort to "hide" gender differences from your child).

I think for names, we kept that until birth. Didn't want people to "steal" the names.

[katydid1971]

We found out and told.

It helps with the planning. If people know, they're not stuck giving gender neutral gifts, they start looking for appropriate hand me downs, etc.

I'm totally fine with people wanting it to be a surprise. I'm fine with, but have a less positive attitude towards people trying to force a gender neutral childhood (I get why they want to do it, just don't think it's that realistic or that the alternative is really so horrible that you'd need to go through all that effort to "hide" gender differences from your child).

I think for names, we kept that until birth. Didn't want people to "steal" the names.

Its funny because we told people DC names to kind of lay claim to them. I didn't want other to use them. But I didn't use an unusual name like "Seven" that could be stolen.

[daisymommy]

We enjoy everyone sharing in our happiness throughout the pregnancy, and all the feeling of community that it brings when loved ones and friends know the sex and name--and the closeness that it brings. So yes, we shared both :)

[edurnemk]

Shared sex, never name.

:yeahthat: Well, we did share the name, but not until 3 or 4 weeks before DS was born. First off, we hadn't made up our minds between our top 2 options, and also we didn't want anyone commenting on our name options.

Now we also shared the sex, not the name, we're still deciding actually, but I plan to wait until she's almost here before telling people. We already get soooo many opinions, suggestions, etc. We've mentioned a couple of our options and some people can't help making a face, or suggesting "alternatives" or trying to "fight" for the one they like.

[codex57]

Its funny because we told people DC names to kind of lay claim to them. I didn't want other to use them. But I didn't use an unusual name like "Seven" that could be stolen.

Lucky. For us, it was like a "first to pop, first to use whatever name"

[swissair81]

We don't share anything. It's our surprise :D

[fivi2]

I planned to not find out about sex, but once we found out it was twins I couldn't handle anymore surprises. So we told about that when we found out. I didn't share names.

[Snow mom]

We shared the sex with everyone and told a few people the name. We only told the grandparents-to-be and our very closest friends. DH's dad instantly started sharing the name though even though he had been told we were keeping it a secret so we won't make that mistake again.

[hellokitty]

I knew for each one at my 20 wk u/s. However, I regret telling ppl that #3 was a boy, b/c I got bombarded with a lot of insensitive and rude comments upon ppl finding out that it was another boy. I still regret ever telling anyone it was another boy. I should have just lied and said that they couldn't get a good shot on the u/s, so the baby was still team yellow.

I NEVER tell anyone, other than my DH the name. When I was pg with #1, both my mom and mil were very pushy and opinionated about what kind of name, I should or shouldn't give my baby. It was so annoying, esp since my mil has horrible english (she insisted it be a name she could pronounce, so that would have limited me to basically one syllable names), and my mom kept saying, "don't pick a weird name," but her definition of weird would be something like, "Zachary," ugh. They begged to know the name of the baby and my instincts were to withhold that info from them. They were upset, but in the end, it was a good decision. The drama later on of letting them pick a korean/chinese name for DS1 really sucked. I was so annoyed that they butchered up, what I thought was a honorable gesture to let them be involved.

Anyway, my parents hate DS2's name (they think it's a girl's name, even though it's always been a very well known biblical name, but since my parents aren't christian, they have no clue about the biblical names), and kept giving me grief about picking a, "girl" name for him. Then my mom insisted on hearing the story associated with the name and didn't like the story so told me I picked a bad name, ugh. Of course, they picked a crappy, old lady name for me, in which I got teased for from grades K-12, so I ended up throwing that at their face to just butt out and I could pick my own kids names, since they already did their damage picking a crappy name out for me.

DS3's name was one that everyone loved, except for my dad. He mispronounced DS3's name for over a YEAR, telling extended family a very weird version of it that didn't even sound like my son's name. IDK what the deal was, b/c it's not a difficult name to pronounce and he can certainly pronounce it now. One of my cousins found out DS3's name from his mom and actually told his mom she must have been confused, b/c the name sounded crazy. Well, it wasn't my aunt, it was my dad who sounded crazy, she got the (bad) info from him. :rolleye0014: Oddly, DS1's name was the only one where I didn't get any flake for it, but I was not happy about the name, b/c DH picked it and refused to budge.

So, the moral of the story is NOT to tell your child's name ahead of time and if you have a boy and are going to have another boy again, don't tell the sex. If you have a girl and then are going to have another girl, don't tell the sex. Unless you have a boy/girl combo of children, ppl will always make crappy comments if you end up with kids of all the same sex. Ppl just general suck with their crappy opinions.

[Liziz]

Before getting pregnant, we had planned on not finding out the gender, mostly because I didn't want to. But then, once pregnant, I couldn't stand the fact that there was this life inside of me, and I didn't even know if it was a boy or a girl! So, we chose to find out the gender. The ultrasound tech couldn't get a good enough image to be certain on the anatomy scan....she said she was "pretty sure" it was a girl, but wouldn't swear by it. Warning....telling people you're "pretty sure you're having a girl, but the image wasn't great so we'll have to wait till birth to know for sure" will get you just as many pink gifts as if you'd said you're 100% sure you're having a girl!.

We didn't pick the name until birth, but didn't share our 2 top contenders (and I still won't share the one of those 2 names we didn't pick, in case we have another girl!). I had no interest in hearing anyone else's opinions of our name choices, so the easiest thing to do seemed to be to just keep quiet about it! People get so offended when we'd say we didn't want to share though, so we just told everyone we had "no idea" what her name would be to keep them off our backs.

[sweet_pea]

We didn't find out the sex and finalized the name only when DD was 2 days old.

[MSWR0319]

With DS we did not find out or share names, although we didn't pick until after he was here anyway. This time we know the sex but haven't told and haven't told names, which again we really don't have anyway.

[garnetgirl]

Both times we found out the sex at 20 weeks and shared the information with anyone who asked. Both times we finalized the names at least a few months in advance but didn't tell anyone; we just kept telling people we were still deciding.

[Gena]

We found out the gender at the 20 week scan. We told our parents and swore them to secrecy. We did not tell anyone else.

The first names we picked (boy and girl) were pretty obvious to family and close friends, since we're planning on naming after favorite relatives. We did not come to a final decision on the middle name until after the birth. But in the end we chose another obvious family name for the middle, so it wasn't really much of a surprise.

[SnuggleBuggles]

We didn't know sex with either. With ds1 we told the name possibilities. With ds2 we also told name ideas but we didn't choose the name till after the birth.

[crl]

Our kids are adopted. We shared gender as soon as we knew. We shared possible names and our final choices. We got a few negative comments on the possible names, but I ignored them.

Catherine

[acmom]

Shared sex both times. Did not share DD's name during 1st pregnancy, but did share DS's name during 2nd since he was named after a family member. We had told that person before he passed away that if we had a son we were going to name him after him, so there didn't seem to be any reason to keep it a secret.

[momtoonegirl]

For DD, we did not know the sex beforehand, but shared name options.
For DS, we knew and told the name, since it was the boy name we decided on if DD were to have been a boy.

[BillK]

When we adopted Zach (domestic) we didn't know what our birthmom was having and didn't tell anyone the names we were contemplating. When we adopted Ben we new it was a boy (Korea) and told our family the name we had chosen for him.

[zag95]

With DD1- we didn't find out the gender, nor did we share names......

With baby #2, we are having another DD! Found out the gender, still working on the name, DD is 8/2!!

[Multimama]

DS1 - shared the sex, kept the name a secret (well, we didn't 100% commit to the name until after the birth, but we didn't really consider any others!)

DS2 - didn't know the sex or the name until after the birth

[ZeeBaby]

We shared the sex and discussed name options, but we didn't decide on names until the end.

[elliput]

I did not know the gender, and with DD did not even have a short list of names until I was sent to L&D (she was 3 wks early). With DS I pretty much had specific names ready. Luckily, I was really set on a boy name. Girl names were much harder (must have been subconscious).

[citymama]

Knew the sex both times and told. didn't share name options either time.

Decided on DD1s name ahead of time
Decided on DD2s in the hospital

[lalasmama]

Totally knew her gender, and told everyone her name :p Of course, she was 3 years old when she came home, so it was hard to NOT tell everyone in the days before she became mine!

[mommyp]

Knew the sex both times and didn't share names either time. We had DD's name for much longer and DH accidentally said it once since we used it with each other all the time. We had a harder time with boy names and only decided a few weeks before.

[Neatfreak]

We didn't find out the sex either time, but we did reveal the names on our shortlist if friends and family asked. (And then ignored the critics) ...

[daphne]

The 1st time, we told the gender, but not the name. The 2nd time we told the name options, but not the gender (that was hard). This time, we've revealed the gender, but i'm not even talking about names, so I'm guessing we won't tell until after the baby is born.

[AnnieW625]

All three times I was pregnant we didn't know the sex of the baby, although all three times I was pretty convinced they were all girls. I told people this too, esp. with DD1 everyone thought I was having a boy because I carried her really low.

With DD1 we mentioned names we had and the only comment we ever got was that one of DH's cousins thought we shouldn't name DD1 Jenna because of the porn star Jenna Jamison who seemed to be around a lot in 2005. We didn't name her that, but I have always figured that we were lucky that no one ever said anything. We didn't have a set boy name until about 3 days before I went into labor because I had always thought she was girl (due to seeing stuff at the 20 week u/s, but never having it confirmed).

With the baby we lost we never actually found out the sex and thankfully we never really got to the point of where people were asking about names and sex. I did ask a friend what her middle name was because the girl name we had chosen her same name for that baby and it was kind of long and I honestly didn't think it needed a middle name. Turns out my friend doesn't have a middle name.

With DD2 it took us forever to find a name (as many of you may recall), but once we finally found one I only recall telling a few people and again we got no harsh criticism. It took us a couple of hours to finally settle on that name though once she was born.

BILW was pregnant at the same time as I was when I had DD2, but they did find out the sex of their baby, however they didn't tell us their boy name so we didn't tell them our boy name. We didn't have a boy so it was a moot point, but if say we had picked the same name as them and used it first toes would have been stepped on. We also knew that we could not use MIL's name (and I wouldn't want to anyway as it is currently a top 10 name) because I just had the feeling that if they ever have a girl they'd use it and BILW later confirmed that.

[smilequeen]

Had to pick your "other" :) option b/c I have multiple answers. I knew and told the sex for all 3.

For the first 2 we had names picked out pretty early. My oldest we knew before I was even pregnant, my middle we knew about a week after finding out he was a boy. But my youngest...we decided on the name for sure a week or two before he was born, and we were still lightly debating, so we didn't tell until he was born and the name was for sure.

[boogiemomz]

We knew and told everyone the sex. We didn't decide on a name until after she was born, but we had several names we were considering and had a short list going to the hospital. Didn't breathe a word about the names we were considering to ANYONE, our two opinions were as many as we could handle!

[klwa]

Both of ours (and planning with this one, too), we knew the sex, and told. However, even though we picked the names, we kept them quiet until after the birth. That way, if we changed our minds (which DB & his wife did), no one was upset (my mom was heartbroken when they told what DNiece's name was, after having heard the other name the whole pregnancy.) & we didn't have to listen to all the reasons why NOT to name a child that. :)

[lizzywednesday]

We did not find out what "flavor" we were having before DD arrived.

This was a lot of fun, as it allowed me the option of coming up with witty remarks about being disappointed that it wasn't an octopus.

We did share some name options. We only had one name picked out for a DS, which we still like a great deal and will probably use should we have a son.

For a DD, we kept going back-and-forth on names because DH and I seem to have different naming styles for girls than we do for boys. He was still pushing for a name I like but not with our last name or our ethnic heritage - we come from German, Irish, Scottish, English and Slovak ancestry; our last name is 2 syllables and of German origin - in the L&D suite!

[almostmom]

We didn't find out the sex of either before they were born. It was very exciting to find out in the moment of birth - really amazing. I didn't feel like I needed it for planning, and people didn't buy us gifts beforehand.

We didn't share name ideas either. I didn't want my mom (or anyone else, but specifically her) to tell me they didn't like it. I knew they would come around once there was a beautiful baby to connect to the name. It was the right choice for sure.

[soon2b4]

I voted Jane/John Doe because
with DD1 - we did not find out sex and did share first name options
and
with DD2 - we did find out and did tell name.

[Seitvonzu]

i'm pretty sure we shared the NAME before we even found out we were having a girl ;) i was one of those people with definite preferences....so everyone let out big sighs when we called and said "we're having a LUCY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" (she is lucille margaret ...after my grandma. i wanted to name her that way, because i'm named after my greatgrandma, and my DH really liked the name "Lucy"-- so it worked well. we are planners ;) and i'm sure we'd talked about kid names before we got married even....)

:) :) :)

i liked people knowing the name because i felt like by the time my kid popped out people felt real connections to her. friends would come up to me and talk to "lucy" -- it was cute and didn't bug me at all. lots of different sorts of people praying and thinking good thoughts for my baby by name? yes please-- i'll took all that good juju that i could :) i also didn't worry about "stealing" the name. we were so certain about it, that it was more like "staking claim" but i didn't think of it that way either.

we do often tell our four year old-- "it's good that you were born to be a lucy and not someone else, because you were stuck. so ...thankfully you are the lucy-est lucy we know!" :)

[essnce629]

Both times we knew the sex and told right away. With DS1 we decided on a name the last month of my pregnancy and told. With DS2 we weren't 100% sure of his name till about 2 days after he was born!

[ilfaith]

With DS1 we didn't know the sex but made the mistake of sharing a few of the names we were considering only to get some negative feedback from my MIL. Decided I would not be making that mistake again.

With DS2 we also did not know the sex, but everyone pretty much guessed the name we would be using since he was named after my grandfather who passed away while I was pregnant.

With DS3 we did find out, and shared, the sex...but we didn't actually make a final decision on the name until I was in labor.