Making career decisions is making me crazy...

[lalasmama]

In the most basic form, at work, I'm a medical assistant... Realistically, my job goes far beyond that, but that's where my training is. I'm also in the middle of becoming an IBCLC.

Since I was little, I wanted to catch babies. At first, like many kids, I assumed that meant I'd be a doctor. Then I discovered midwifery, and discovered that it fit my "don't go looking for abnormalities when everything is normal" personality in regards to medical things. So, in my pre-teens I decided to be a midwife. However, in college, I started on a pre-med track while I tried to balance school and my newfound-at-the-time love of boys. Boys won out, I dropped out of school, and then ended up being a medical assistance when all was said and done.

It's time for me to get back to school. I'm approaching my mid-30s, I'm a single mom, and I am so tired of trying to make ends meet with a job that I find minimally fulfilling.

So now, after being a medical assistant for longer than I'd like to admit, I'm ready to start back to school. Unknown to each other, I've had multiple people (MDs, residents, and med students) suggest/comment/ask why I didn't stay on the pre-med track and become a doctor. Midwifery is still very much where my heart is, but I've recently realized how much I also enjoy working with teens who are at that point where they're making grown up choices, but no one is allowing them to make the choices that need to be made. Those moments are going to be pretty slim if I'm a midwife. However, I'm not sure I want all the other stuff that comes with being OB/GYN or Family Medicine if I become a doctor.

This career thing has been going round and round my head for the last 10-15 days. It's making me crazy! I never imagined it would be such a conundrum for me to figure out....

(Ahhh, that feels better to just admit that I'm wavering about either option!)

Suggestions? Thoughts? Advice?

Help, please!

[codex57]

Get back on the pre-med track and figure it out later.

You're sort of worrying about what clothes to wear to the awards ceremony when you haven't even entered your name into the competition yet. Cart is so far beyond the horse, the horse can't see a cart.

You have plenty of time during medical school to figure out what kind of doc you want to be. Hell, you have plenty of time to even figure out if you want to be a doc, pharmacist, optometrist, psychiatrist, whatever while you're getting the pre-reqs to even be eligible to apply to those grad schools.

[wendmatt]

I hate to be a downer, and I might be completely out of line, but becoming a doctor as a single mother (not sure on amount of support you get) sounds like it might be biting off more than you can chew. How far did you get in your degree? Can you do premed and continue on to be a mid-wife? I agree with what Codex said, start slow and see how school goes. I've returned to college to become a teacher and it's tough with a child and I have a supportive DH and that's not doing Doctor training and hours.....
But if it's what you REALLY want to do, you'll make it work. Good luck, you can do it :)

[pinkmomagain]

What about Physician Assistant?


ETA: Duh! I guess you wouldn't be able to deliver...but I'd imagine you would be able to work in an OB/GYN office...a

[crl]

What are the training requirements to be a mid-wife?

Catherine

[hellokitty]

In your situation, I would go to nursing school to become an RN. Get experience working in maternity, and go from there. You may be happy working in the maternity unit in L&D, or you may decide to further your education and get your MSN to become a midwife. Another option that would require less schooling would be to become a doula. You won't be catching the babies, but you can be very involved in the birth process and also postpartum with BFing. If you are already working toward become a IBCLC, it is MUCH easier to do as an RN, than as a lay person. So, ultimately, if you want a college degree, I see nursing as being the most flexible one for you. You may go into nursing school and even discover that you have a completely different interest from maternity care.

[ellies mom]

In your situation, I would go to nursing school to become an RN. Get experience working in maternity, and go from there. You may be happy working in the maternity unit in L&D, or you may decide to further your education and get your MSN to become a midwife. Another option that would require less schooling would be to become a doula. You won't be catching the babies, but you can be very involved in the birth process and also postpartum with BFing. If you are already working toward become a IBCLC, it is MUCH easier to do as an RN, than as a lay person. So, ultimately, if you want a college degree, I see nursing as being the most flexible one for you. You may go into nursing school and even discover that you have a completely different interest from maternity care.

:yeahthat:
A lot of the requirements for the IBCLC are met by the nursing pre-reqs. You can get your education in stages and work while you are doing it. I know a lot of the RN to BSN programs are designed for working nurses. Most of the ASN programs in our area have transfer agreements with a four year program. I went to Clark and because I've passed the NCLEX, I go in as a senior (spread out over two years because of the whole working thing) at WSU Vancouver. Clark has a good reputation as well as Mt. Hood. My nurse managers are less impressed with PCC.

[Liziz]

I have absolutely no experience with midwifery, so I can't comment there. But I'm married to a doctor, and have been with him through all his training so far (he's still in residency). I am a practice administrator for a physician group practice. After seeing what it's taken for him to get where he is, I have pretty simple advice I always share whenever someone talks to me about pursing that career path....if you wholeheartedly want to be a doctor, and you're 100% sure that's what will make you happy, do it. It can be a wonderful and fulfilling career. However, it is a demanding career path (just to get through training!), not to mention expensive in both money and years of your life. If you are not 100% sure you're all-in, don't do it. It's not worth the stress and frustration, etc., unless you know for sure that's exactly the right decision.

In a shorter response, I agree with Codex....start back on your pre-reqs, (I'd imagine they're similar for both?), and give yourself time to consider.

[swissair81]

In your situation, I would go to nursing school to become an RN. Get experience working in maternity, and go from there. You may be happy working in the maternity unit in L&D, or you may decide to further your education and get your MSN to become a midwife. Another option that would require less schooling would be to become a doula. You won't be catching the babies, but you can be very involved in the birth process and also postpartum with BFing. If you are already working toward become a IBCLC, it is MUCH easier to do as an RN, than as a lay person. So, ultimately, if you want a college degree, I see nursing as being the most flexible one for you. You may go into nursing school and even discover that you have a completely different interest from maternity care.

:yeahthat:

I loved L&D enough to know I want to go for midwifery. It's slow and steady, but I'm getting there. Plus as a RN, you make money much sooner than as a doctor. In addition, if you finish you Associates and get a job, many times the hospital you are working for will help you with tuition, and also may forgive the loan if you give them a certain number of years as an employee. Also, I agree with you about not wanting to have to deal with some of the things OBGs deal with. I'm perfectly happy with my midwifery track.

[swissair81]

What about Physician Assistant?


ETA: Duh! I guess you wouldn't be able to deliver...but I'd imagine you would be able to work in an OB/GYN office...a

I think it depends where. My step-sister is a PA in Maryland and she delivers babies.

[karstmama]

i'm a midwife, though not working as one now.

if you're a medical assistant / single mother, the path to midwifery would be much easier than the path to ob/gyn or family practice physician. i agree with the above, unless you're totally committed to the md, it's not worth it. if you look only at the salary, it looks big, but when you take out what you pay for student loan service and insurance, it's much less take home than you might think.

so easiest path - associate's degree rn, then work as a nurse maybe in labor & delivery or maybe on mother/baby while taking your adn to bsn courses, then some work in l&d for a year or so, then back for your msn in midwifery. there are distance courses and traineeships. i completed school at east carolina university (in-state) with no student loans whatsoever.

is that right for you? only you can tell. but it is the easiest path and you'll make good money as an rn the whole time.

keep us informed!

[codex57]

salary isn't necessarily that much over a RN either. RNs can get overtime. Not that they can't get paid real well even before the overtime.

Plus, I dunno how open they are about it, but some med schools (and other of the doctoral grad schools) hesitate to take older students because the training is so long that by the time they're done, they don't have that long of a career left. Better to give the coveted spot to someone younger who can have a longer career.

[Sillygirl]

How can you know in advance if you're 100% committed to becoming an MD before you start? I sure as heck didn't. I didn't know any doctors socially and I had only the vaguest idea about medical economics, lifestyle, etc.

Yes, the training is long and hard. Yes, medical school can be super expensive. I love being a doctor and I wouldn't change it for the world. And there were times along the way I nearly quit. And I changed my chosen specialty at least five times. In the end, I wound up where I'm supposed to be.

It might not be the most flattering way to paint my personality, but I like being in charge. I'm a leader. There's no way I would have been satisfied as an RN or NP or PA.

I did residency with a few single moms and it's super hard on them. Do your training where you have family or friends for help. Make your own support structure. There are programs and schools that cater to nontraditional students. You can do it.

The training is long, but your time in your career is longer. Make sure it's something you love to do. Even with all the hassles, I still think being a doctor is amazing. It's worth it.

[lalasmama]

I guess I should have mentioned that I have absolutely no interest in being an RN at all; I've been a MA for so many years that I'm ready to start being more on my own. The idea of hospital nursing makes me think, "Bleh!" I have no desire to go to school for years more and still have to have a doctor telling me what to do.

If I do the midwifery route, it would be a Certified Professional Midwife, which is actually a BS/MS program. I think I'm about 2-3 terms from having the pre-reqs completed for it (just need to finish up my science classes), so, if accepted my first application round, I'd be done in 4-5 years.

As I've started writing about it to clearly think it over more, and reading responses, I have to say that the idea that "if my heart isn't all in it, becoming a doctor probably isn't the right way to go" is really resonating with me at the moment. Maybe that tells me where my heart really is...

[zag95]

Lalasmama-
You mentioned that you have Lifebalance at work- do you have access to EAP? See if you can meet with a career counselor to work thru some of the points discussed here.

I'd say work toward being a CNM (Certified Nurse Midwife)- can you go P/T in your current position and be working toward your goal of becoming a midwife? Is there a P/T option or is it only FT?

Can you get any tuition reimbursement to take classes toward your goal at your current place of employment? To me, given your current situation, I'd also be looking at what the job market looks like for midwives in the Portland area, if that is where you plan on staying for a while. You might look on the Oregon employment website and see what the projection is in terms of employment opportunities in the future- in other words, what's the demand? Will you be entering a field that is saturated in PDX or is there a need??

GL!!!

[georgiegirl]

Midwife.

The cost of becoming a physician (not just $$$ but the strain it put on your family) is really high. In your situation (being a single mom), there's no way I would recommend it. Dh is a physician, and he was not able to contribute much when dd was young. She was born during his last year of residency and he was really busy and stressed his first few years of practicing. Most people who have kids during medical school or residency need a major support person to give the kids what that parent cannot give them. Granted its easier now than when dh was a resident (he had "real" call where he had to be in the hospital for 36 hours straight every 3rd or 4th night on many rotations when he was an intern.). Then there's the whole issue of malpractice insurance. Unless you are 200% sure you really really really want to be a physician, I wouldn't even think about medical school in your situation.

I have several mom friends who are going back to school to become midwives. From your posts, I think any woman would be lucky to have you as part of their child's birth.

[Sillygirl]

The new hours regulations have really changed residency. I've talked to lots of residents who say it's pretty easy. That might not be as true for the surgical specialties, but there has been a huge culture shift in medicine. Get going now because I think eventually they'll have to tack on extra years to make up for the fewer hours.

[Liziz]

The new hours regulations have really changed residency. I've talked to lots of residents who say it's pretty easy. That might not be as true for the surgical specialties, but there has been a huge culture shift in medicine. Get going now because I think eventually they'll have to tack on extra years to make up for the fewer hours.

"pretty easy" is relative....the hours DH had to work seemed "pretty easy" this year with the second hours reg change (i.e no more 36 hour shifts)....until DD was born. Now, even with the "easy" hours, he often leaves the house before DD is awake in the morning, and if he's lucky, makes it home in time to rock her to sleep at night....6 days a week. DD is only 9 weeks old and it's so hard on him to not be able to have more interaction with her....and I have to imagine it would be even harder to be in that situation with an older child.