Question about Ellyn Satter

[cilantromapuche]

I posted about helping DD lose weight a couple weeks ago. I read her book and she says to let the child eat all the bread they want if that is what they want. Isn't that outdated? I don't serve bread with meals and I am taking away from the book that you serve the food they feed themselves but my kids would only eat bread if they could (that and dessert and I know b/c that is what MIL let's them do).

BTW, there is this post here on the NYT about helping a daughter (or child) lose weight.
http://parenting.blogs.nytimes.com/2012/05/03/talking-to-a-child-who-is-overweight-but-unaware/?src=recg

[Katigre]

I think that particular bit of advice is outdated and completely unhelpful for a child who might have sugar/carb addiction issues.

[sntm]

i agree. with overweight issues, unlimited bread access is not a good thing. i'd replace that with unlimited vegetable or low-fat protein options, whatever your child likes.

[Katigre]

i agree. with overweight issues, unlimited bread access is not a good thing. i'd replace that with unlimited vegetable or low-fat protein options, whatever your child likes.

Right - I'd provide a few unlimited food options and would focus on high fat/high protein items (natural, healthy fats and not processed ones, natural protein items and not protein bars, for example).

Ex. Nuts and raisins together always being an option would probably be the default in our house. We have a variety of nuts the kids can snack on if they're hungry. A scoop of nut butter might be another option.

ETA: The reason for high fat options is that they make you feel full, and if they are not paired with sugars/carbs won't make you gain weight but will give you energy. Eating low fat/just produce will not keep you full as long.

[JElaineB]

You're missing the point of her advice. The reason she says to have bread on the table is to make sure that there is something you are serving that your child will like and have it available eat so that they will not feel deprived. Feeling deprived is what leads to overeating. I urge you to let go of your resistance to following her plan and just try it full out for at least a couple of months. The whole point is to allow your daughter to change her internal mindset about food being something she has to worry about to allowing food to be a non-issue, which will lead to her only eating how much she really needs for her body to grow and function optimally. I know much of her advice seems counter-intuitive, but it does work. When we were fully on the plan it worked, really worked for us. I have the weight charts to prove it. We have slipped quite a bit and now I really regret it, it is harder to restart now that DS is older.

[anonomom]

You're missing the point of her advice. The reason she says to have bread on the table is to make sure that there is something you are serving that your child will like and have it available eat so that they will not feel deprived. Feeling deprived is what leads to overeating. I urge you to let go of your resistance to following her plan and just try it full out for at least a couple of months. The whole point is to allow your daughter to change her internal mindset about food being something she has to worry about to allowing food to be a non-issue, which will lead to her only eating how much she really needs for her body to grow and function optimally. I know much of her advice seems counter-intuitive, but it does work. When we were fully on the plan it worked, really worked for us. I have the weight charts to prove it. We have slipped quite a bit and now I really regret it, it is harder to restart now that DS is older.

:yeahthat:

Satter's main thesis is that with any food, a kid will naturally self-regulate and eat only as much as they need. She says it does take a while, and the child may go through a phase of eating even more than they used to, but then will even out.

That said, I don't think you have to have bread available if that's not something your family tends to eat. As long as you're offering a variety of foods and at least one that you know your kids will eat, you're probably in good shape. I suspect Satter recommends bread because most kids will eat bread even when they turn of their noses at almost everything else.

[fedoragirl]

I have to agree with the above two PPs. I am reading Satter's book now and it does seem to insist on letting children overcome their own eating hangups and start a healthy relationship with food. Instead of regular bread, have you tried whole wheat? Maybe you can substitute some healthy options in bread itself.

[Katigre]

Ah, that makes a lot of sense! Then I think I'd just figure out what are 1-2 foods my child will reliably eat that help them stay full and that they can figure out how to self-regulate. Not that it necessarily has to be a loaf of Wonder Bread out on the table each night, just that it was a common example of a popular kid food.

[Simon]

I think you've got it now. Its not about bread, but unlimited access to something the kid likes at every meal plus all the other healthy options. We've done something similar with super picky Ds2. He has unlimited access to at least one thing he likes and then the rest of dinner is stuff we'd like him to try. Some days OK, others (most) its a big fail but he'll just not eat vs. eat things he doesn't want/like.

However, we did have good success using this approach with snacks. Ds2 has a favorite not super healthy snack and we have given him open access. He used to eat as many as 3 servings, though never more. Now he asks for just one and is satisfied and will even pass on the food. Before we did this, when we were the gatekeepers, it was a constant desire for him.

[cilantromapuche]

Thanks for that. It has been so crazy busy and I have piles that I have to read for work that I read it really fast.
I have been insisting that they eat when we eat dinner and not come back 5 min. later for something else. I am making them save stuff for snack time when they get a cookie or something like that from school, etc.
I really wish I had read it before!!! Yikes, lately it feels like there are a lot of things that I screwed up on.

[karstmama]

no! you tried an approach and want to refine it, you didn't screw up.

remember, your goal is to raise people who can afford their own therapy.