Do I tell DS now or wait until next school year?

[HIU8]

DS's school ended today. Friday DS's good friend (there were only 8 in his class--5 boys total) was pulled from the school by his parent on Friday suddenly. The only reason I know this is b/c the mom of this child had set up a party at a jump place today. I took DS and it was cancelled. I emailed another mom and she told me what happened (but did not understand why I was not included in the email that explained that the party was cancelled and the little boy was no longer at the school). Anyway, do I tell DS? He is upset the party was cancelled and is very focused on it (overly so). Should I just wait until the beginning of the school year to let him find out his friend isn't returning to school?

[SnuggleBuggles]

Tell him now- just get it over with. :(

[AnnieW625]

Until you know the whole story no I would not tell him especially since he goes to such a small school. If you never find out I would just tell your son at the beginning of school that the boy moved away. If that ends up not being the whole truth and the boy ends up returning then maybe the boy will tell your DS what happened.

[ZeeBaby]

Will he have seen the child over the summer? I might wait if not.

[HIU8]

Will he have seen the child over the summer? I might wait if not.

We will not be seeing this child over the summer or ever again.

[HIU8]

Until you know the whole story no I would not tell him especially since he goes to such a small school. If you never find out I would just tell your son at the beginning of school that the boy moved away. If that ends up not being the whole truth and the boy ends up returning then maybe the boy will tell your DS what happened.

I don't know if I will ever know the full story (or if I even want to know, honestly). I feel bad for DS b/c this little boy was a good friend.

[SnuggleBuggles]

Wow, why won't you see him again? It doesn't sound like the bad blood is with your family, right? Sorry you are dealing with this.

[HIU8]

This child doesn't live near us and isn't enrolled in camps in the area.

[wellyes]

So a good friend of his is being pulled from his life forever? Yes tell him now. Just be prepared that whatever you tell him might spread.

[SnuggleBuggles]

Certainly you can meet in the middle for some play dates. Maybe?

[AnnieW625]

Then tell him that the boy no longer goes to school and of he asks why then say I don't know. Good luck

[ahisma]

DS had this happen, although he was just 4. The boy was seriously his ONLY friend. It was hard.

To make things worse, the boy was suddenly going to come back 6 months later - the school told DS before they told me. DS was thrilled, elated.

Then, he didn't come back.

My gut says to be as upfront and candid as possible, unless there are adult circumstances involved.

With this situation, I think the parents were just free spirits...in every sense of the word.

[HIU8]

Certainly you can meet in the middle for some play dates. Maybe?


I get the gut feeling that she pulled her DS and is cutting all ties with anyone associated with the school (hence canceling her kids end of the school year and bday party combo). Having talked with this mom throughout the year she seems like an all or nothing type of person. I'm fairly certain we will never see her again as she chose to change circles per say.

[nfowife]

Has he asked about the boy? Or just the party? I probably wouldn't say anything unless my child asked about that kid. If they did ask (and that probably wouldn't be until next year) say, I think he changed schools and leave it at that. About the party, you can say you don't know why the party was cancelled and leave it at that.

People moving doesn't really bother my DD, since we are military and WE move pretty often. However I'm sure that the next move will be harder as we will be leaving the elementary school she's been at since k and it will be after 2nd grade. It will be more difficult.

[Green_Tea]

Has he asked about the boy? Or just the party? I probably wouldn't say anything unless my child asked about that kid. If they did ask (and that probably wouldn't be until next year) say, I think he changed schools and leave it at that. About the party, you can say you don't know why the party was cancelled and leave it at that.



I agree. Unless this was his very best friend that he spent a great deal of time with outside of school, I'd wait for him to ask. And then I'd answer honestly - that you heard that they decided to go to another school and you don't know why they cancelled the party. If it's not someone he would have seen regularly over the summer, he may not really care come fall. Why get him all worked up now?