Facebragging

[KpbS]

So annoyed when certain friends use FB as a platform for bragging. You don't need to tell the world that your DC has finished his summer reading program in 5 days reading X number of minutes just to ask for some book recommendations for your 7 yo. Truly. I get it, I've got a voracious reader at home who I actually have to limit his hours spent reading. Just ask for the recs already.

[babyonway]

That is why I hate FB. Don't we all wish life was really as perfect as our "friends" posts? Hee hee


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk.

[swrc00]

I hate to admit it, but I have one friend, who I occasionally have to remove from my news feed for this very reason. She constantly brags about her daughter's abilities and how proud she is of her. She does this multiple times a day.

[bisous]

I have a few friends like this. It is annoying. I try to be "happy" for them but it just rubs me the wrong way. I'm actually finding FB more and more annoying altogether!

[mytwosons]

My biggest pet peeve of FB! But, I just remind myself that those people must be unhappy or insecure.

This morning, a "friend" was facebragging about moving into a 1.75 mil house courtesy of her DH's employer. She is moving from an area that has been hit hard, so many of her FB friends have been squeezed financially. I know at least one of her friends lost their home, several others are struggling to hold on or short-sell and some have DHs who have been laid off. So insensitive and self-absorbed.

[AnnieW625]

I hear you. I only check FB on my phone now so I am severely limited with features, but I actually think I avoid a lot of the bragging and such. :bag Sometimes I feel about people who post their kid/family brags in the BBB Lounge too; now the pancake cake (and other baking brags or woodworking stuff) brag, that is AWESOME!, but sometimes kid brags are just as irritating as FB brags.

[janine]

I am waiting for them to get an option that says "BS" next to the "like" button before I start participating again.

Agree that FB has really brought out the worse in terms of keeping up with the Joneses because nothing can actually be verified.

[MMMommy]

I hear you. Not FB, but a friend of mine sent out this holiday newsletter where it contained nothing but brags about her kids and herself and her husband. 90% of the newsletter was boasts and brags about everything her children have done exceptionally. Ranging from "perfect attendance award" in school, to "doing X number of math problems in Y number of minutes," to "reading at an X grade level," to earning medals and awards in ALL extra curricular activities. The remaining 10% talked about how well her and her husband were doing in their respective professions and promotions.

I wanted to gag.

[hellokitty]

I don't mind occasional bragging on facebook, since I think it's normal to think that your kids are great. However, some ppl are out of control and yes, it's super annoying. I wish that facebook had an, "eye roll" response.

[OKKiddo]

I hate to admit it, but I have one friend, who I occasionally have to remove from my news feed for this very reason. She constantly brags about her daughter's abilities and how proud she is of her. She does this multiple times a day.

I have several friends that I have to hide as well. I don't think they understand how especially hard it hits me because our children are the same age exactly but my children are developmentally behind hers due to their autism. I can't focus on what they "should" be doing at this age, I can only focus on what they've already accomplished and how far we've come. Needless to say, they have no power over me if I can't read them. :)

[crl]

Oh, see this unnerves me. I just started doing Facebook. I posted that ds played in his first baseball game, but didn't post how he did because I didn't want people to think I was bragging. (But I am so proud of him, I really kind of wanted to share.). Guess I should remember to keep quiet.

Catherine

[kristenk]

Oh, see this unnerves me. I just started doing Facebook. I posted that ds played in his first baseball game, but didn't post how he did because I didn't want people to think I was bragging. (But I am so proud of him, I really kind of wanted to share.). Guess I should remember to keep quiet.

Catherine

I think your post was fine! I think it's more the over and over and over and over positive posts that get to people.

[Green_Tea]

Oh, see this unnerves me. I just started doing Facebook. I posted that ds played in his first baseball game, but didn't post how he did because I didn't want people to think I was bragging. (But I am so proud of him, I really kind of wanted to share.). Guess I should remember to keep quiet.


It kind of unnerves me, too. I'm not sure what makes something qualify as bragging, or what makes it annoying. Is it the frequency of the posts? Or is any post that celebrates a kid's accomplishment annoying? I have lots of friends who post things like "So proud of Sam for scoring a goal today!" or "Both girls got great great report cards - we're off to Ben & Jerry's to celebrate!" Right now my feed is full of recital pictures and baseball stats and end of year honor roll certificates.

I kind of like hearing about what other people's kids are up to, and have definitely been know to say how proud I am when DD placed at a swim meet or DS read me an entire book. I don't do it every day, or even every week, but isn't that what Facebook is kind of all about - sharing what's going on in your life?

[MamaMolly]

I think it is fine to post things like recitals, awards, etc. Stuff you'd like to show grandma. But if you are on FB several times a day updating the world at large on the insignificant details of your child's life then it is a big YAWN.

Also, referring to your spouse only by a pet name is gaggy.
As is a nightly facebrag about your dinner. Unless you are running a restaurant, then it is ok.

[KpbS]

No, no I want to hear about home runs, recitals, honor rolls, etc. It's the frequency like PP mentioned and this one post with the over the top details--All of his summer reading requirements, specifically X minutes in 2.5 days--that just got to me. :rolleye0014:

[HannaAddict]

This is why I rarely post on FB, there are a few over the top people that deserve eye rolls, but I hesitate to post any fun trips or horse camp ( because it is pricey) so people don't take it wrong or feel jealous. The taking pictures and posting dinner thing doesn't bug me, but my flank steak and minute rice won't ever be posted!

[Uno-Mom]

One thing people do forget about fb: not every status is intended for every friend. Yeah, obviously we all get all our friends stati but some people post extra stuff to placate out-of-town grandmas, etc. Dh and I posted an absurd number of baby pictures when Sprog was born, for example, with the disclaimer to explain that we were oversharing for dh's opposite-coast relatives.

I like to imagine that made us bearable for all our child-free friends!

I enjoy reading about kids' activities and accomplishments. Like others have said, it's different when the posts are obnoxious and 5x daily! I don't have any friends like that. I don't think I'd enjoy being friends with someone that clueless.

[elektra]

Well I do think it can be difficult to balance being upbeat and positive (as opposed to constantly complaining and being negative) with not being a braggart or "acting like your life/child is the best thing since sliced bread" on Facebook. I know I have done Facebragging before, as I posted tons of DD's recital pics, and I plan to post more from our vacation. However, I totally feel you OP, as I have certain FB friends who have the ability to use whatever kind of nuanced verbiage that they are gifted with that manages to grind on my last nerve.

[roseyloxs]

Guess I am lucky I don't have friends like this. Although my friends mostly have young kids so the bragging is usually about first steps or the rare 4 hour nap.

Although I was once pretty peeved when a friend posted that she had her pre-preggo body back in under a month. Then said anyone can do it if they put in the hard work. Her baby was in the NICU since she was born 2 months early. So not only did she not put on the major lbs you get at the end of pregnancy but she was also able to go to the gym 3x a day. Not that I envy any mom who deals with the emotional roller coaster of NICU concerns but the statement irked me all the same.

[wellyes]

I like braggy posts, but this is BP, so I won't get into it too much. But I will say:
Also, referring to your spouse only by a pet name is gaggy.
Or frequently referring to your husband as "Daddy"

[mytwosons]

I don't mind the occasional "braggy" kid post. I like to hear what my friends' kids are up to!

I think it can be a fine line, but you know it when you see it. In the case of the friend I mentionned, she is clearly over the top. Her xmas cards are always filled with detailed bragging. e.g. A top ten list of great things that happened to them with the dollar amount included.

A good clue she is over the top: The people who comment or like her posts changes every 6-12 months. People become friends with her on FB and then can't take it after a while. She then meets new people, friends them and the cycle starts over.

[janine]

I think there is a difference between a braggy/trying to one up everyone post and one that is proudly updating everyone (on kids). And I think those reading totally see the difference!

Braggy posts to me aren't just about kids...and it's usually the same person over and over. There is never deviation from the message.

[niccig]

I get the poo posts. I would take bragging over knowing which kid left a turd in the bath tub. That I did not need to know :barf:

[m448]

Which is why I hate facebook. Don't get me wrong, I'm on it and enjoy connecting with relatives overseas and seeing their pics. I enjoy the messaging system (person to person) and having a platform for starting a thread involving a small group.

But the wall is akin go wearing a bulletin board of your personal information on your back. TMI on a bad day and boring on a good day. I think facebook makes us have to put up with people who otherwise wouldn't even write letters or make phone calls. Suddenly they have a platform for every nonsensical thought.

And yes I'm aware of the irony that I have a blog but I like to think of it as my little playground and I'm not assaulting people in my life with hourly updates on my lunch, my latest bag or that it's taking too long for my dentist to call me back to my appointment.

[klwa]

I get the poo posts. I would take bragging over knowing which kid left a turd in the bath tub. That I did not need to know :barf:

*laughs* I had one of those showing up yesterday. All I could think was, hopefully her DD will NEVER KNOW mom was talking like that. :)

[janine]

another thing that annoys me is when a husband or wife posts some nausteating love letter to their spouse on FB going on about how much they love them..see you later honey, etc. Is there some reason this has to be public to 100 of their closest friends?

[edurnemk]

another thing that annoys me is when a husband or wife posts some nausteating love letter to their spouse on FB going on about how much they love them..see you later honey, etc. Is there some reason this has to be public to 100 of their closest friends?

:yeahthat: this is also my main pet peeve with FB. It seems more about bragging about how wonderfl and perfect yoyr marriage is, than actually commucating with their spouse. Can't you just tell him IN PERSON? Or call him, text him, email him or sent him a PRIVATE message? I have never written on DH's wall.

[kdeunc]

another thing that annoys me is when a husband or wife posts some nausteating love letter to their spouse on FB going on about how much they love them..see you later honey, etc. Is there some reason this has to be public to 100 of their closest friends?

Amen! DH's sweet young cousins (in their 20s, I'm old:)) do this all the time. Really?? Can you not tell her that at home?

[AnnieW625]

Oh, see this unnerves me. I just started doing Facebook. I posted that ds played in his first baseball game, but didn't post how he did because I didn't want people to think I was bragging. (But I am so proud of him, I really kind of wanted to share.). Guess I should remember to keep quiet.

Catherine

See that would not bother me at all or receitals, or ballet/dance, or what not. It is the constant my kid did this, and my kid did that as well as all of the silly relationship talk that sometimes happens by people who waste way too much time on FB. I also get irritated with people who link to their own sugary sweet blogs that paint their lives as being perfect as well.

[lizzywednesday]

See that would not bother me at all or receitals, or ballet/dance, or what not. It is the constant my kid did this, and my kid did that as well as all of the silly relationship talk that sometimes happens by people who waste way too much time on FB. I also get irritated with people who link to their own sugary sweet blogs that paint their lives as being perfect as well.

Posting that you're proud of your kid for playing in their first baseball game or participating in their first dance or music recital is perfectly fine.

Plenty of my friends who are parents post about their kids' first steps, teething, etc., and it's wonderful to be able to share those milestones with their kids, in my opinion.

It's the over-the-top, constant bragging that seems to fill some other void in someone's life, THAT is what the OP is talking about I think.

Like you're the perfect housewife or perfect mom or your perfect son/daughter just got a perfect report card with perfect attendance or whatever, but you rarely post anything less-than-perfect, so it's kind of, well, irritating to the rest of us who try our hardest to share news, warts and all, with our extended net of acquaintances.

I even self-censor - I don't post about politics or religion, though I do occasionally post about sports.

[MMMommy]

another thing that annoys me is when a husband or wife posts some nausteating love letter to their spouse on FB going on about how much they love them..see you later honey, etc. Is there some reason this has to be public to 100 of their closest friends?

:yeahthat:

Can't stand the spousal gushing posts. "I have the sweetest, most loving husband in the world...."

[elliput]

another thing that annoys me is when a husband or wife posts some nausteating love letter to their spouse on FB going on about how much they love them..see you later honey, etc. Is there some reason this has to be public to 100 of their closest friends?


:yeahthat:

Can't stand the spousal gushing posts. "I have the sweetest, most loving husband in the world...."

I was looking back through the FB history of a friend I have known since elementary, but had just recently reconnected with and saw this type of posting from both her and her DH (who was also in our HS class). It abruptly ended several months before I reconnected with her, and then I realized her relationship status was single. :eek: So just because there are public declarations of love and admiration doesn't necessarily mean everything is going well in the marriage. It may be a big ol' sham.

[echoesofspring]

I am waiting for them to get an option that says "BS" next to the "like" button before I start participating again.

:bighand:

[Fairy]

Like with anything, there's a balance you need to strike to not get the eyeroll. Constant negativity? Hide. Constant bragging that your kid is super duper? Hide. Constant politics and causes and Save The _____? Hide. I also try to self-censor.

[Still-in-Shock]

I have a "one post a day" rule for myself, to make sure people don't get bored or overwhelmed. My pet peeves are the people who post all day long about everything, and I mean EVERY thing that happens in their life. Please spare me.

[TwinFoxes]

Like with anything, there's a balance you need to strike to not get the eyeroll. Constant negativity? Hide. Constant bragging that your kid is super duper? Hide. Constant politics and causes and Save The _____? Hide. I also try to self-censor.

Of these, the constant negativity and the constant harping on the same causes (I love animals too, I really do, BUT KNOCK IT THE HECK OFF WITH THE 'PLEASE ADOPT THIS LOVELY DOG" POSTS! I DON'T LIVE IN YOUR CITY!) are the ones most likely to get you sent to the "hidden" group. Also posts about how offbeat and quirky you are. You aren't. Yawn.

[Still-in-Shock]

I forgot about those, Twin Foxes. I also have lots of people who post that people should copy their post or profile picture to support every known illness and other such stuff, and I resent when they imply that if I don't, I'm a heartless witch. I know they all mean well, but I sure would like them to all think first, because we don't need 70 posts about hating cancer.

[klwa]

:yeahthat:

Can't stand the spousal gushing posts. "I have the sweetest, most loving husband in the world...."

I was FB friends with a lady who was posting that regularly. When I knew that her husband & my SIL (brother's wife) were having an affair that all four of them knew about & were trying to work through. Sadly, just about everyone on her Facebook feed knew about it as well, because their pastor (all 4 of them) made a comment from the pulpit one day about it. And still, the lovey dovey gushy posts.

[MamaMolly]

:yeahthat:

Can't stand the spousal gushing posts. "I have the sweetest, most loving husband in the world...."

My DH posted one of those once. He'd forgotten to sign out of his FB account. It was REALLY sappy. :innocent: :loveeyes: :innocent:

[Melbel]

I am actually pretty tolerant of most facebragging and enjoy sharing in my friend's triumphs, big or small (straight As, performance in a game, honors, etc). As indicated by prior posters, there are limits though, and it can be difficult on where to draw the line. I agree that frequency is an issue, even if it is the weekly updated that their gymnastics protege won yet another competition. We get it - she is very talented and we are happy for you!

I have had some face brags on occasion, but try to keep it the exception, not the rule (i.e. DS teaching DD2 to read, DS' return to swimming and personal best time). I tend to think personal best times in swimming are fair game because it is not comparing my child to any other child. Then again, my FB friends may not see it that way! I have not ever shared my DCs' grades because that seems like more blatant facebragging. DD1 is a great swimmer, but I have not shared any of her successes on FB either. It makes me a little sad when I feel we cannot share life's victories without becoming a braggart. We have revealed our Lyme story on FB for the purpose of increasing awareness, so we try to balance the sad with happier moments too. I tend to share more pictures than most because I enjoy photography and it is the easiest way to share with family who are always clamoring for more. Photos of trips and birthday parties could be construed as facebragging, even if it was not our intention.

My most annoying facebragging friend is the single mom who posts pictures of herself rocking a bikini every single weekend. She looks absolutely fabulously, no doubt. A picture or two would not annoy me. The frequency of the posting is the in your face part, particularly considering that most of us do not look so great in a bikini these days.