Jacksmommy2b
09-11-2012, 05:57 PM
I appreciate your excitement. Honestly, I do.
But can we just clarify a few things?
To everyone:
Yes, this is baby #3 but I promise you the labor and birth will still make enough of an impression that I will not forget to mention it. I promise. When there is something to announce, I will. Just like I did with the last two, remember?
You do not have to keep calling and texting. The random 'just making sure I shouldn't start boiling the water!' ha ha ha and 'Don't worry, I have the towels ready' ha ha ha calls stopped being funny about a week ago. Just so you know. Oh and "When are you giving me my great-granddaughter" makes me want to smack you, even if you are my only living grandmother.
Additionally - the questions about effacement and dilation? You do realize you are essentially asking out the status of my vagina, right? And you are aware that that is just never really appropriate, right? And you do know that it is ten times ickier because you are my dad, right? I get that all your kids were born by c-section, but you are an executive at IBM - I think you can grasp the basic mechanics enough to know just how strange those questions continue to be.
And to my mom and sister:
I still don't want you there. No, really. Yes, I'm sure. Thanks for checking again, but I still haven't changed my mind.
And no, this isn't 'your last chance'. You still have three other children (or two other siblings) of childbearing age and plenty of time to guilt them into allowing you to witness their children's birth. Please continue to sigh and pout as it just cements in my mind that I would not want you in that room in a hundred, million years.
But can we just clarify a few things?
To everyone:
Yes, this is baby #3 but I promise you the labor and birth will still make enough of an impression that I will not forget to mention it. I promise. When there is something to announce, I will. Just like I did with the last two, remember?
You do not have to keep calling and texting. The random 'just making sure I shouldn't start boiling the water!' ha ha ha and 'Don't worry, I have the towels ready' ha ha ha calls stopped being funny about a week ago. Just so you know. Oh and "When are you giving me my great-granddaughter" makes me want to smack you, even if you are my only living grandmother.
Additionally - the questions about effacement and dilation? You do realize you are essentially asking out the status of my vagina, right? And you are aware that that is just never really appropriate, right? And you do know that it is ten times ickier because you are my dad, right? I get that all your kids were born by c-section, but you are an executive at IBM - I think you can grasp the basic mechanics enough to know just how strange those questions continue to be.
And to my mom and sister:
I still don't want you there. No, really. Yes, I'm sure. Thanks for checking again, but I still haven't changed my mind.
And no, this isn't 'your last chance'. You still have three other children (or two other siblings) of childbearing age and plenty of time to guilt them into allowing you to witness their children's birth. Please continue to sigh and pout as it just cements in my mind that I would not want you in that room in a hundred, million years.