PDA

View Full Version : Just so frustrated!!!! Poop in the potty!!!!!



glbb35
11-03-2012, 02:43 PM
I know this is not the end of the world and eventually it will be a thing of the past but I have to bitch and whine somewhere to keep me from loosing it! My twins are in the midst of poop training and I am just so tired of it. Potty training we have mastered pretty well over the last few weeks. Pooping on the potty isn't going anywhere.I am so tired of dressing them and having to shower them, rinse out their yucky underwear, then wash them, then redress them until God knows when it happens again. They are tired of us either ignoring it all together, or yelling at them, they are tired of the showers "no more showers!" and the constant changing of clothes. IT happens only about twice a day but I am over it.

I just got the baby down, the kids are outside while DH works on one of "his" projects and I finally sat down to enjoy a meal while it was warm. Too much to ask???? I guess so. Then both twins come in b/c DH sent them b/c they both sh$$ in their pants. So I have to put down the food, and then go upstairs and put them in the shower and clean out their underwear. Yuck!!!!!!!!!!! Why, why, why won't they poop in the potty????????????????? I don't understand how smelly, squished sh$$ feels better than letting it drop out your butt into a toilet where your mom can help you do a quick wipe? Am I being insensitive to their plight? Ugh, just poop in the potty!! Please I am crying to stop smelling sh$$. Please Lord, give me strength and help me to remember this too shall pass. And please while you are giving me strength, give the kids the courage to just poop in the potty. For all of our sakes. Ugh....

Ok, rant done. I am sure you know don't want to eat lunch now. Sorry. I had to take the frustration somewhere so I maintain my dignity here. Thanks for listening.

B

DS 03, 06,twins 09, 7/11

hbridge
11-03-2012, 02:50 PM
BTDT (but only with one)!!! This is when I found the wonders of Pullups. For my child, we used them for the time between wet training and poop training, they saved us many times. DC could pull them up and down like underwear to use the potty to pee, but they would also contain the poop and make cleanup much easier on both of us. We traveled quite a bit at this stage and there was NO WAY I was traveling with "poopy" underwear.

I know people hate pullup style "diapers", but they are fantastic for this.

Good luck and know this is a stage that WILL pass.

Mommy_Mea
11-03-2012, 03:08 PM
Smiling and nodding the while way. I wad just telling my best friend (yet to have kids) about poop struggles after she saw him poop his pants. He has been pee trained since January, and I thought we had poop licked (eww, lol) in June, but we are in the middle of regression #2 right now. Pooping in the potty had always been scary for him, and very stressful. I never thought poop would make me want to pull my hair out, but here I am, losing my mind as I see ds1 do his poopy dance. So, I completely understand! We have had some good forward progress, so this to shall pass!

the first success we had was telling ds1 that when he turned 3, no more diapers, he needed to poop on the potty (we had been putting a diaper on him when he need to poop). After one or two accidents, he started using the potty. after our first regression, we find his "currency" (hot wheels). We set up a reward chart, and he got a car after pooping x number of times (x becoming a progressively longer period).

I hope any if this can help!

mikala
11-03-2012, 03:12 PM
Totally feel your pain and went through something similar. Have they ever pooped in the potty? Any chance they are constipated? Is it a fear or they just don't want to stop playing? Maybe time for a naked day followed by some commando time? We had good luck with the "oh crap" ebook plus a small candy reward only for pooping. The author of the book recommended a month of commando time before undies because undies feel too much like diapers.

I think I'd also start using some chilly water for cleanup after accidents if it's stubbornness instead of a fear or physical issue. :rolleyes:

Kymberley
11-03-2012, 03:45 PM
We're dealing with this here as well, with just one child thankfully. I gave up. He pees just fine, butI didn't mention pooping or potty for a month. That ended a couple of days ago. He's still pooping on himself, but I refuse to be completely enraged like I used to get. He'll get it. Until then, Pulllups. And I'll be darned if anyone is going to make me feel guilty about it.

georgiegirl
11-03-2012, 04:28 PM
Both of my kids were pee PT way before poop PT. however, my kids would request pull-ups to poop in. I didn't pressure them too much, but every so often I would try bribery and other ideas (the poopy fairy). Dd was in underwear full time a month after 2, but didn't poop on the potty till she was 3.5. Yes, over 1.5 years later. So frustrating. What worked in the end was pez.
Ds was pee trained for 6 months before ring poop trained. We finally got him pooping on the potty a month ago. Again, we used pez and peer pressure . (His younger cousin came to visit and she would poop on the potty.).

Both my kids were scared for some reason.

Can you tell them they can ask for a pull up if they need to poop? That way you are eliminating the nasty pooping in their underwear problem.

elephantmeg
11-03-2012, 05:03 PM
pull ups and bribery! Really! DS got a matchbox car for each poop... and a whole set (5) of them for the first poop.... Then after 10 or so I went to a sticker chart where he got a car for every 5 and then every 10.. and at the end of the chart (30 or so) he got some toy he really wanted

glbb35
11-03-2012, 07:04 PM
Well we got through a few hours and then one pooped again. I was so angry I just took him up to the shower and showered him again and never said a word. He knew I was mad and actually didn't say much back and didn't cry much.

We have tried pull-ups and do use them at night. Since they are potty/poop training at preschool they have them in the routine of only wearing underwear. They on;y go 1/2 days 2x a week but it must make an impression they only want to wear underwear. I finally did put twin#2 in a pull up and he was actually bummed.

We have tried reward charts, candy (which after Halloween we have lots to bribe with!) but I think they think it is sooooo gross that they don't want to touch it when they have to wipe. One had gone on the potty once the other not at all. 2 at a time can be difficult but it can also be a great motivator.

We will keep plugging away and seeing how it goes. We have no choice so I guess with it now and laugh about it later. :) Or cry now and then cry of relief later :) to met this is one of the hardest things about being a parent. To me babies- pretty easy breezy and I have had premies with issues. But this, just stumps me. Why can't they do it!!!!

:) We will be fine here. Just need to vent. It is nice to know I am not alone!

Thanks and if you come up with any other ideas, I am all ears!

B

DS 03, 06, twins 09, 7/11

Green_Tea
11-03-2012, 08:00 PM
Oops. Double post.

Green_Tea
11-03-2012, 08:02 PM
Can you tell them they can ask for a pull up if they need to poop? That way you are eliminating the nasty pooping in their underwear problem.

A huge :yeahthat:. Then you'll be able to determine if they actually are ready to by poop trained. Many kids have a hard time "timing" it right and by the time they realize that they need to poop, it's too late. If they can hold it long enough to get into a pull up, then you can be fairly sure that they are 100% ready to actually poop on the potty. You'll also avoid all those showers.

FWIW, a PP is right. It's not at all uncommon for a kid to take months to be poop trained even if they are 100% pee trained. It took my DS close to a year.

Also, you mentioned that they are grossed out by wiping. Can you assure them that *you'll* handle that part?

BabbyO
11-05-2012, 11:49 AM
A day or so late...but I can TOTALLY relate...except that it was only 1 DC. He just refused to poop on the toilet even when he KNEW he had to go. (He'd head off to his corner).

Anyway, a friend lent us the book "Everyone Poops." I have NO idea why, but DS just got it after we started reading this book...and he loved the book - asked for it every night. I swear it was less than 2 weeks and he was going poop on the potty 99% of the time with a few minor accidents.

elephantmeg
11-05-2012, 01:36 PM
the other thing to watch for is that they aren't constipated. The power struggles over poop training led to wicked constipation in DS which made it worse since it hurt and we ended up doing miralax for a while. And yes, I heard the whole "you have to stick with the underwear" too. And did it for a while. But eventually I came to the decision that I wanted to spend time with DS not being frustrated with him over poopy underwear..... it will happen. Unfortunately it feels like FOREVER while you are in the middle of it...

catsnkid
11-05-2012, 03:28 PM
We had to do Miralax for a few months since ds was holding it in and prolapsing his bowel. If you don't know what that is you really don't want to. What finally worked was giving him an ikea potty and had him sit on that while watching tv in the evening. It worked and we have been poop trained for several months and prolapse free for 2 months with no miralax. One recent exception was that he woke up with it in his pull up last week, but it had been a long time.

rin
11-05-2012, 04:53 PM
Oh man. DD1 went through this too. It was awful! I finally invested in a box of latex gloves to at least make the poopy underwear cleanup slightly less revolting for me.

What worked for us was finally just finding her currency, which turned out to be M&Ms. We taped a baggie of M&Ms to the bathroom wall, and told her that when she pooped in the potty she could have some M&Ms. It took a few days, but then she just decided she was ready, and so far (almost a month now) it's been pretty much 100% since that first day! Still holding my breath, but so far so good.

ETA: We're still doling out M&Ms for every poop. At this point (she only gets a few each time, it took us almost a month to go through that first regular sized bag) I'm perfectly happy giving her M&Ms for the next year if it helps form the habit. I'm sure at some point she'll stop asking, and if not, I'm counting on the whole poop-in-the-potty thing having become enough of an ingrained habit that she likes doing it for its own sake.

brittone2
11-05-2012, 05:01 PM
Yeah, I will say like a few PPs that getting into a battle can lead to withholding, which is a freaking nightmare!

We didn't have battles over it, but DS1 started withholding after a move (didn't want to poop in the new house) and it went on way too long. He had encoperesis type of stuff going on for a long time afterward.

So he pee trained at 2 (right before or around 2nd bday), but he was over 3 until he was pooping regularly in the potty. He was constipated from withholding and the soft stuff would leak around causing "skiddies" as he called them. I remember having a newborn/infant and I'd just sit down to nurse her or she'd fall asleep in arms or need a nap, and DS1 would need his undies changed. Sometimes more than 2x a day. Not fun!!! It wasn't really in his control at all at that point due to constipation, but it didn't make it less frustrating.

Anyway, I say that only to caution you that making it into a battle is a cause of withholding for many kids (wasn't in our case, but a common theme with constipated kids. And that can cause lasting issues with leakage and other problems that are very frustrating anyway.

That doesn't make it less frustrating though!

Thankfully my next two kids only had very mild issues with poop training. DS2 went through a bit of attempting to withhold a few weeks after he started pooping in the potty, and I went right to miralax after my experience with DS1. Worked great for us. To this day, if he doesn't poop for a few days, he has more pee accidents, since constipation can also affect their bladder control. That doesn't happen often, but right now I know he has to poop because he's had 2-3 accidents in the last two days, and hasn't pooped in a few days. Once he poops, the pee accidents will stop. THat's how it presents with him. He rarely withholds, but when he does, that's what we deal with.

Hang in there!

MamaInMarch
11-05-2012, 07:24 PM
I think I'd also start using some chilly water for cleanup after accidents if it's stubbornness instead of a fear or physical issue. :rolleyes:

I hope this was a "joke" because I find that downright cruel.