Do you believe in signs from god/the Universe?

[Simon]

I have always believed that when I am treading the "right" path for my life, things will go more smoothly, and that if I feel like I'm banging my head against the wall, then maybe its just not the right thing/choice/direction. Like the Poster who just got a job and there were openings at their preferred child care, etc (sorry, don't want to use names, but you get the picture). Things are going smoothing because its the right time/job/decision, etc. Now, this conflicts with the idea of valuing perseverance and fighting for things that are important, so I get a little muddled at times. So help me out here, am I crazy or am I just being deaf/blind/oblivious?

I have been wrestling with the decision to withdraw from a degree program. This is a career changing decision. I've been drawing out the process and its time to finish or leave. I am *months* behind (self-imposed) deadlines for pulling the plug. This fall I am supposed to be making the final effort. I am making some progress and could finish, but I also feel like I am being thwarted at every turn, largely as medical stuff for Ds2 and now Ds3 are eating up more time that I ever imagined possible. In fact, I am not even doing everything I am supposed to because I have tried to maintain some work time for myself. I could easily spend even more time on medical stuff.

Monday night I am up at 2 am nursing Ds3 and giving myself a pep talk. I can do this, I have a two solid days ahead to work on this project; I could make some real progress so I will re-dedicate myself, see how far I can get, blah blah.

While I am doing this I hear a child stirring upstairs, then I hear a child creeping down the stairs and I hear Dh with Ds2 in the hall. What has happened? Ds2 threw-up. Bye-bye work time. With all his health issues, he never vomits. Seriously, its like God is saying to me, "Get the message already. Stop trying and leave." But all the logical/responsible parts of me are saying that would be madness. How could it possibly be the right decision?

Part of me wants to just say, "Sick kid, lousy timing." The other part of me feels like its God/the Universe talking. This is just one in a series of events this fall and but the most obvious in terms of timing. Does this ever happen to you? What do you think?

[Kymberley]

I believe. DH left Med school because of many signs. It was the right decision.

[arivecchi]

No, but I am not religious. I do not look for any signs in the first place and just try to make the best decisions I can given the facts at my disposal.

Sorry that things have been so rough for you, but if continuing your studies makes sense for you and your family in the LR, I would make it happen.

[specialp]

I don't, but I do believe if one feels signs, it could be because they are looking for any confirmation that the decision they want to make is the right one.

I'm sorry you are facing obstacles at every turn. I know that has to be weighing on you. Good luck to you.

[KLD313]

I absolutely do, especially if you feel that way. I would trust your feelings.

[kellij]

Well, I'm a huge believer in listening to what you know for yourself. I was married previously and he was just the wrong guy. I felt like I was going down the wrong path, and everything was a struggle. My marriage, my job, I have an eye disease that got a lot worse, gained weight, etc. I mean, a lot of that is stress from one affecting the other and then snowballing, but it just seemed like I was making a series of "wrong" choices and things kept getting harder until I backed up and headed the way I was supposed to go. I don't know what it is, if it's self-inflicted, or what, but I definitely know I've felt it.

If I was as close as you are though, I would be tempted to finish, just for the sake of finishing and then not necessarily do that job. I'm not sure what the job is, from your post, but I always think it's a great idea to have something ready to go if something happens where you need it, like something happening to your DH.

[Jacksmommy2b]

Just me, but I find that when I am looking for or seeing signs I am really just looking for justification for a decision I have all but made.

I don't think it was a 'sign from God' but more a 'sign' that your decision to leave is the right one based on your kids' health.

Good luck in what you decide!

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[California]

You sound exhausted! If you are close to finishing, IMO you should push through and finish the degree. Kids are complicated, no matter what you are pursuing in life. If you can wrap up your degree you may find that it is an asset in a related field that better fits your personality. Would you be able to find part time work with it or flexible hours? If yes, then it'll help you in the long run to take sick days when your kids need you.
Is your DH able to take sick days to care for kids? That would give you back your work time right now to get some studying done.

[maestramommy]

Yes. dh and I think we were meant to be. It's a long story but we believe.

OTOH, I don't believe in fate. I think our choices dictate much of our lives.

ETA: okay reading your post more fully. It's a tough one but I don't think any of the things you are experiencing are signs you should quit. Life is really really challenging sometimes, and I don't wonder you are burned out. Seriously, I would be ready to throw in the towel myself! But I wouldn't attribute it to signs in the universe.

[ha98ed14]

I believe in God and I believe in "doors opening" if it's the right path. That said, I still think you should finish. You are *this* close. Finish. You never ever have to use the degree, but finish it unless it will cause you or your family PERMANENT damage. Some inconvenience and strife is okay for them to bear; YOU get to pursue things, too! If you want it or think you might someday regret not finishing, finish it.

ETA: You could also look at the situation you described as "A sick kid is a sick kid. Nothing more."

[MamaMolly]

Perspective is a funny thing. I tend to see a struggle in the right direction as proof that Evil is real. I seriously used to not believe in true evil, but life and experiences have really taught me differently. I don't mean to sound corny, but DH works in law enforcement so IMO he's one of the good guys. When life starts kicking him (or us) around I see it as Evil trying to put obstacles in his path, and he has the choice to continue to fight Evil or allow it to turn him away from his calling. I feel like times of trial are the fires that forge who you become.

There is nothing wrong with realizing that you might be on the wrong path and need to change direction. But look at the goal and decide if the sacrafice is worth the goal. If it is, then it is just a series of obstacles to over come, which you can do. If not, then change the goal.

Good luck as you go forward. I hope you feel secure in your heart no matter what you choose.

[hillview]

I don't but I do listen to what I think is right and sometimes the cards stacked against me like you describe give me more motivation to make it happen (that which does not kill me makes me stronger). Other times I realize it isn't worth it and I call it in.

[Cam&Clay]

Nope. I feel like when I see signs I'm just trying to convince myself that it's okay to make the decision I already want to make.

[hellokitty]

I'm not religious, but yeah. Sometimes, when it's struggle after struggle to reach a goal, I will tell myself that maybe there is a reason why nothing is going right and I will back away. There have been times where I have sat back and reflected on periods of my life when I was upset that something did not work out, only to realize that it DID end up working out, b/c I didn't know what good things I was in store for and if that other thing that didn't work out had worked out, it would have actually complicated matters even worse. Vice versa, sometimes things come so easily, I feel like it was just meant to be. So, yes sometimes I feel like the universe is trying to tell me something, lol.

[bisous]

I do! People call it different things, "inspiration", "intuition", "mommy gut" I've heard all of these.

I had two specific instances similar to what you describe. #1, I stopped homeschooling DS1 despite the fact that he had atrocious prior experiences at school AND the fact that he was absolutely thriving at home (both of us were!). I initially really resisted my impression but the thought just would not leave me that it was time to put him in public school. After I determined that I really just needed to follow my gut, I felt great peace. Only AFTER that did I discover that it was absolutely the right time and circumstances to put DS1 back into school. He has thrived and had some amazing experiences. I cannot believe how grateful I am for my "intuition".

The second involves moving into my parent's home. I was SO sad about it and my heart and head and every part of me cried out that I didn't want to do it. The feeling that I needed to move forward wouldn't leave me so I followed my gut. It has been challenging here to say the least. However, because I have been here, I met a lady in my church that directed my family to an absolutely amazing living situation. We are about to become renters in house that we can not in other circumstances afford. It is HALF the price of similar real estate and truly a one in a million opportunity for our family. We would never have fallen into this circumstance if we had been "wise" and "prudent" and followed the course of our heart and head.

I believe in following my "mommy intuition". It isn't blind or silly or careless. It is careful and thoughtful and very easy to discern. When you make the right choice, you feel peace despite what comes next.

Only you can know what you are truly feeling in your heart. But I wouldn't discount your feelings without really serious self examination!

Good luck!

[sste]

No. If it was the case I could probably tally a few thousand signs! DH went through a highly demanding medical specialty training and I went into a career that was if anything more competitive to land positions. We both love our work, find it intellectually challenging and generally fun and we are in stable positions that allow us alot of financial flexibility. The process was NOT fun however!

I don't know if you feel comfortable sharing more but in my mind finishing might depend on how much you enjoy the work, whether there is a decent job market for it, etc. If almost done meant you needed to slave over a dissertation for two years in a field where there were almost no jobs and you weren't passionate about it either. . . well I would hesitate.

[momof2girls]

Nope. I feel like when I see signs I'm just trying to convince myself that it's okay to make the decision I already want to make.

:yeahthat:

[StantonHyde]

I have received many a cosmic thunk on the head in my life time--like a total slap up the head and not when I was looking for one either. Then there were the people who came out of the wood work at exactly the right time after my mom died. Oh yes, there are clearly signs. And sometimes in hind sight, I realize I should have seen x--but didn't because I did NOT want to see something that didn't confirm my decision.