Big Gift: Get Kids What They Want vs. What You Want for Them

[carolinamama]

DS1 is 7 and in 1st grade. We were planning to buy him a new bike for Christmas - 20 in since he is starting to outgrow his 16 in. He's mentioned that he wants a bigger bike with brakes on the handle but not for a few months.

He has just started asking for a Nintendo DS for Christmas. I don't have a problem buying him one except that he isn't a video gaming kid. Our Wii has been in the closet for the last 6 months and no one seems to care. He has an iPod Touch that he uses regularly but doesn't abuse. He's the type of kid who chooses to play outside over playing video games. But he now sees other kids playing on their DSs and says he wants one. If it matters, we are giving the kids an iPad collectively for Christmas.

In your opinion, would you get your child what they ask for or what you want for them and kinda think they will use more (but of course I could be wrong)? I just don't want him to be disappointed on Christmas morning.

[SnuggleBuggles]

I have a 10yo ds and DSs are really kind of the staple of his peer interactions when they aren't playing outside. "Don't forget your DS!," they say as they are making their plans. It becomes a social device, in some ways. I'd personally get the DS. I'd consider the bike a "just because" purchase and it get it another time; if you want him to bike then he needs a bike that he can use and it was an expected purchase to need to upgrade, I bet.

I usually do go with what they want vs what I want for them. :) It's Christmas. :)

[icunurse]

What they want, even when I cringe at it ;). DS asked for a 3DS, which I finally broke down and bought. I figure I can enforce the same rules as with his DS and if that is what he really, really wants....Christmas is about being almost magical, if possible. Getting the gifts that you never thought you wold (within reason). DD wants an AG doll and thinks she has zero chance of getting one....except one sits in u closet as I write, waiting for Christmas Day.

Not sure what kind of bike you are looking for, but Walmart has a Huffy for $39 right now. It isn't heavy and has held up well for my DS and a couple other people we know who have it.

[KrisM]

To a large extent, what they want.

DS1 asked for a 3DS. He has a DS Lite, but wants to play the newer games. He's not a big video game kid either. We borrowed a Wii for 2 weeks in February and no one has asked about doing that again since. He knows the 3DS is really expensive and figures he won't get it. But, that's his gift. And, yes, he plays on his own, but he very often plays with friends and neighbors. When he goes next door to play, he usually brings it. They do play outside, etc, but after a few hours, they switch.

I don't gift bikes, as for us, Christmas is not bike season. DS1's birthday would be great, as it's April. But the other 2 are too late. If they need a bike, they get a bike.

[niccig]

I just posted asking the same thing.
I'm not sure. DS doesn't play much with the games that we have.

It sounds like some kids play the DS socially, but we haven't experienced that at all.

Still on the fence on this one.

[queenmama]

I would go with the DS in this specific situation, because, like PP said, it's not bike season here... Not until April, really! But that depends on where you live.

DH shops for gifts that HE wants for Henry vs what Henry wants. Sometimes it's fun and surprising, sometimes it can be disappointing. I'm talking specifically of the "big" gift, because I always buy several of the "smaller" things on Henry's list.


Lara

[carolinamama]

Thanks guys. I think we will go with it and deal with the bike isssue in the spring.

[lhafer]

In your case, I would go with the DS over the bike. Bikes are better for summertime or birthdays IMO.

But to answer your question - it really comes down to the toy options I think. Like my DD1 really really wants one if those huge radio controlled nemo fish balloons. She's been asking for over 2 years now. But she will never get one. Only because I know it has about a 15 minute wow factor, and then the excitement will be over forever. Not worth it, even though I know that's what she would really like.

So instead I'm getting her some other stuff (a new scooter and some new littlest pet shop stuff) that I know she will be very happy with. So I'm taking my considerations over hers with that. I always choose what the big gift will be. She asks for so much and its always a variety of stuff, that rarely does she have ONE big thing that she wants. So I take into consideration what she's into and go from there. This year the BIG gifts will be the circus littlest pet shop stuff set up and on display for her, and a huge melissa and doug stuffed white tiger.

[elephantmeg]

we are somewhere inbetween. DS wants santa to bring the lego fire temple. It's $120 which is really over our whole budget for everything (santa plus us). He had a list of other things he really, really wanted so we're going with the imaginext castle for the santa present and a lego set, a brickmaster set and either a lego game or a used digital camera. Bikes though are a replace as needed item.

[redhookmom]

What they want. It is their one day when they get just what they want and not what mom thinks is best.

There are certain things like bikes, books, craft supplies that I look at as the supplies of life and are budgeted elsewhere.

I can remember going to sleep on Christmas Eve just hoping, hoping, hoping that Santa go the one thing I really wanted.