#*$&(#*&$ mil

[marymoo86]

Thanks for allowing me to vent.

As if my DD doesn't already get the short end of her attention. She has physically seen her 1 time this year, MIL starts complaining to BIL about why can we not come the weekend before Christmas instead of the weekend after. Because.......she doesn't want to have to keep up Xmas decorations for 4 more days.

We are the only family out of town so it isn't like we will miss anyone AND she does not work so she has plenty of time to take down the decorations.

[arivecchi]

Ugh. What does your DH think about his mother's behavior?

[marymoo86]

He thinks it is stupid but he never addresses it with her so it continues. That's another bitch in itself ;)

[jal]

Seems like she just needs to be told your schedule doesn't accomidate you coming the weekend before Christmas and you will only be able to make it for a visit the week after.

If that schedule doesn't accomidate her decorating plans, then tell her to take the #@%$ decorations down... you're coming to visit her, not the decorations.

[hellokitty]

What a peach. We're going through some similar issues with both sets of grandparents right now, esp my parents, but the dysfunction attn swings back and forth btwn both sides, if one side is behaving the other side is acting psycho and vice versa. :hug: Don't you just wish that ppl like this could act like the adult instead of spoiled teenagers?

[arivecchi]

If that schedule doesn't accomidate her decorating plans, then tell her to take the #@%$ decorations down... you're coming to visit her, not the decorations. :ROTFLMAO: What a great response.

[123LuckyMom]

Also, if she's a Christian you could remind her that Christmas STARTS on December 25th and doesn't end until January 6th. You are actually visiting during Christmas!

[eagle]

you're coming to visit her, not the decorations.

exactement

[MamaMolly]

If that schedule doesn't accomidate her decorating plans, then tell her to take the #@%$ decorations down... you're coming to visit her, not the decorations.

:yeahthat: I got nothin to add. ;)

[elliput]

If that schedule doesn't accomidate her decorating plans, then tell her to take the #@%$ decorations down... you're coming to visit her, not the decorations.
:jammin: Before I saw this awesome response, I was baffled as to why she puts the decorations up in the first place if they are so inconvenient that she has to take them down almost immediately after Christmas Day.

[vonfirmath]

Also, if she's a Christian you could remind her that Christmas STARTS on December 25th and doesn't end until January 6th. You are actually visiting during Christmas!

Really? Christmas lasts until January 6th? I'm Christian and never heard this before.

I would have no problem with MIL taking the decorations down if she wanted. As folks said, going to visit MIL, not her deco.

[snowbunnies300]

My grandmother always had her tree down a couple days after Christmas. I guess for her the holiday is over so take down the tree. I didn't understand it but it was the way she was.

[lizzywednesday]

Really? Christmas lasts until January 6th? I'm Christian and never heard this before.

...

Yes ma'am, the liturgical season of Christmas lasts from Christmas Day through January 6th.

It's the "12th Day of Christmas," which is also observed as the Feast of the Epiphany, when the 3 Wise Men found (and recognized) Jesus as the Messiah. For more info, this Wiki article is pretty good:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Epiphany_%28holiday%29

My SIL is Cuban & she celebrated it as Three Kings' Day as a kid. (I think it can also be translated as "Dia de los Tres Magos" but my Spanish is quite rusty.)

[khalloc]

I usually take my tree down about 1 week after Christmas.

I have never heard that Christmas lasts until January 6th either. I was raised Catholic and even went to Catholic school with daily religion classes until I was 12.

On an aside, I cant stand it when people keep their decorations out way past Christmas. I think Jan 30 should be the limit.

[marymoo86]

I just wanted say to that I :heartbeat: you guys!!

[karstmama]

yup, around here you'll hear it called 'old christmas' and you're not supposed to do laundry between christmas & old christmas according to the old wives. :)

[arivecchi]

I usually take my tree down about 1 week after Christmas.

I have never heard that Christmas lasts until January 6th either. I was raised Catholic and even went to Catholic school with daily religion classes until I was 12.

On an aside, I cant stand it when people keep their decorations out way past Christmas. I think Jan 30 should be the limit. January 6 - the Epiphany - was the official end of the holiday season where I grew up. I grew up in a largely Catholic country.

http://catholicism.about.com/od/holydaysandholidays/p/Epiphany.htm

[StantonHyde]

Advent is the season before Christmas. It used to be, you did not put up decorations etc so early because you were expected to reflect on Advent with Advent wreaths etc. And then Christmas was from Dec 25-Jan 6. In fact our Episcopal Church doesn't do the nativity at the kids xmas eve service. They wait till Epiphany to do the whole shebang--as would be historically accurate. (not that the December/Jan dates are probably accurate in the first place...)

[123LuckyMom]

Advent is the season before Christmas. It used to be, you did not put up decorations etc so early because you were expected to reflect on Advent with Advent wreaths etc. And then Christmas was from Dec 25-Jan 6. In fact our Episcopal Church doesn't do the nativity at the kids xmas eve service. They wait till Epiphany to do the whole shebang--as would be historically accurate. (not that the December/Jan dates are probably accurate in the first place...)

We still observe Advent in our house. We decorate slowly throughout the season of Advent and don't complete the decorations until Christmas Eve. Then they stay up until January 6th. My 4 yr old will tell you that Advent is the season of waiting. He really enjoys making an Advent wreath, lighting the candles progressively, and finally getting to the last candle on Christmas. It keeps the focus on the religious meaning of the season and off of the toys! DURING Christmas is when we watch Christmas specials and do many fun events. DH takes the week off, and we really celebrate!!! Sorry to hijack!

[pastrygirl]

Curious, what did you all think the 12 days of Christmas referred to? :) (if you didn't know about the Christmas season and Epiphany.)

[elizabethkott]

Curious, what did you all think the 12 days of Christmas referred to? :) (if you didn't know about the Christmas season and Epiphany.)
This is so funny - J asked me about the 12 days of Christmas tonight! His question: "Are the Twelve Days of Christmas like the eight days of Hanukkah, but MORE? And does that mean I get MORE presents?!"
Sadly, nope kiddo. ;)

[belovedgandp]

I figure if people stopped decorating the day after Halloween they wouldn't feel the need to take the stuff down on the 26th.

I grew up observing Advent - wreath with candles and a Jesse tree - minimal decorations until right before Christmas and then up through Epiphany.

I can understand not necessarily stretching until the 6th for everyone, but at least New Years in my book.

I love to decorate for Christmas and do the whole house up, but I do wait until after Thanksgiving. It stays up through January 6th each year sometimes the weekend after just depends on the calendar.

[ladysoapmaker]

I grew up with the tree not coming down until after Jan 6th. Growing up Catholic meant we did advent and knew the 12 days of Christmas started Dec 25th. (Mom would occasionally remind us of the significance.)

Jen

[kellyd]

So sorry... I had a similar situation when I told family we weren't traveling on Christmas Day since last Christmas they'd told me we'd celebrate a different day since it's so hard w/ the kids. This year I got "I never said that! and I'm not making 2 big meals in the same week" I told her that was fine since we didn't come down for the meal we came for the family time, but I was not traveling an hour away on Christmas Day this year period.

[vonfirmath]

Curious, what did you all think the 12 days of Christmas referred to? :) (if you didn't know about the Christmas season and Epiphany.)

Countdown of the 12 days before Christmas.

Though, mostly? Just a cool song not something real at all. I mean, who gives PEOPLE for Christmas? Maids-a milking, guys dancing, etc!

I've vaguely heard references to Three Kings Day, etc. But we didn't celebrate Christmas after Dec 25th growing up at all. We did Celebrate before Dec 25th -- but not Advent or anything like that. just learning more about the birth of Jesus and why He came.. The Christmas tree got taken down usually on Jan 1st, but always before we went back to school. It got put up on one of the weekends before Christmas when we were free.

[squimp]

yup, around here you'll hear it called 'old christmas' and you're not supposed to do laundry between christmas & old christmas according to the old wives. :)

uhhh yeah I follow that tradition. :D

[dogmom]

I feel obligated since one side of my family were Russian Orthodox that Christmas can also be January 7th! We called it the "back up" plan in our house. "Grandma can't make it for first Christmas, but she will be he by Christmas number two."

Seriously, sounds like someone has spent there extra time on developing some routines that MUST BE STUCK TO no matter what. Sometimes it's a sign of early dementia also.

[Dcclerk]

My grandmother always had her tree down a couple days after Christmas. I guess for her the holiday is over so take down the tree. I didn't understand it but it was the way she was.


I am your grandmother :)

I love all of the significance of advent and we do the Jesse Tree, etc., and I also thoroughly enjoy the knowledge of the 12 Days of Christmas.

But, even though I'm Christian, I take down the tree on Dec. 26. It goes up the weekend after Thanksgiving, and down on the 26th every year. For me, I enjoy the decorations leading up to Christmas and then it feels clutter-y and oppressive as soon as it is done.

Ridiculous I know, but it has always bugged me that my mom left her tree up past Christmas, and as soon as I had my own household, I immediately changed the rituals, acknowledging that they do not reflect everything that they could for the history of Christianity.

[janine]

He thinks it is stupid but he never addresses it with her so it continues. That's another bitch in itself ;)

You have my sympathy...IL bitch of my own to follow ;)>