Help me help DD with school

[elektra]

Academics are not coming easy for DD.
My focus thus far has been letting her make mistakes, being selective in my corrections, and reading books to her- all with the goal of trying to foster independence, curiosity, and enjoyment of learning.

But it's like things have gotten harder all of sudden and she is getting discouraged. She still cannot read or effectively sound words out, and she is needing to be able to do this in order to complete her work (ex. filling in the blank in a sentence). She is supposed to be learning sight words and she is either not really trying or is just not getting it/memorizing them.
Her handwriting is still pretty bad with a lot of backwards letters and numbers still.
We did a bob book last night and even after we told her at least 10 mites that "saw" is "saw" and not "was" she kept saying "was".

We do flashcards for the sight words per her teacher's instructions, and I have her try and sound stuff out here and there. She gives up really easily or seems to just guess, like when I ask her a math word problem.

It quickly turns to whining and throwing the paper/pencil.

And it may sound like all we do is work and math drills but that is not the case at all. We do 10 min max at a time.

I feel like things should be clicking by now for her and they are not yet.

How can I better help her?

[brittone2]

Is she getting phonics in school?

[AnnieW625]

:yeahthat:

Have you had her hearing or her eyes checked? They usually do done sort of screening in kindergarten.

I would start off by talking to her teacher.

Good luck!

[BunnyBee]

Does her school have a reading specialist? It could be normal and things just haven't clicked yet. Reading is being pushed in schools earlier and earlier. Or, it could be a sign of dyslexia or another learning disability. Your signature says 5, and young 5 versus old 5...

[niccig]

Does her school have a reading specialist? It could be normal and things just haven't clicked yet. Reading is being pushed in schools earlier and earlier. Or, it could be a sign of dyslexia or another learning disability. Your signature says 5, and young 5 versus old 5...

:yeahthat: DS took the longest time to learn letter sounds. He was making progress but was very slow. His teacher wasn't worried. I had him tested for phonemic awareness where I take him for speech therapy and he tested very low. We've worked on that and even though now reading at age level, I had him evaluated by reading specialist and he has weakness in a few other areas of reading. I decided for DS to see her weekly now to work on them, rather than wait as felt waited too long to get help in first place. DS is grade 3 next year, so want him to be on track for harder school work.

[sophiesmom03]

My school district told me letter reversals were common until age 7. I'm not a teacher so have no firsthand expertise.

[Melbel]

We have had good luck with more subtle teaching tools such as DVDs (i.e. Talking Letter/Word Factory) or computer/iPad games (apps such as Starfall ABCs, PocketPhonics). We also would play with foam letters in the bath (finding letters, later changing cat, to bat, to hat, etc.). Perhaps if you can sell it as entertainment, you will not face the power struggles.

As for reading, my kids all learned much better with Dick & Jane books. They liked the illustrations and the repetition helped to build confidence.

HTH! Hugs.

[zag95]

I would talk with the teacher- and see if there is a reading specialist that she may be able to get some additional help from.

One thing that I have been doing with DD (who is in PreK but just turned 5) is doing books on CD, with following along in a book. I show her the words, and she looks and listens.

DD has also watched some of the Leapfrog DVDs on Netflix.... and done some games (Starfall, games on PBS, Word ID on Dora, etc) I would try to incorporate some of that type of thing, so it makes it more "fun" and less frustrating. The classroom teacher or perhaps the public library might have some other suggestions on literacy-focused websites and resources.

[icunurse]

My Dd will be 6 this summer and is having many of the same issues that you are describing. To make matters worse, her older brother just learns easily, which makes Dd look even more behind.

Short of a vision issue, I think that what you are describing is frustratingly normal. Letters can be reversed up to age 7. And I think sometimes with sight words they see the letters and not the order. Or part of the word (DD will say black when the word is blue, but gets it right when i stress to look at the whole word). Her phonics skills seem lacking from how it was when DS was in K and I'm not sure if it is her class or just her. She has finally started to take an interest in reading and writing, like writing in her super secret diary lol. But I am considering enrolling her in Kumon over the summer just to keep her/us on track.

Don't even get me started on math....

Hang in there :)

[inmypjs]

I would also start by talking to the teacher. I would second some of the recommendations that have been given - fun Ipad apps and Leapfrog DVDs can be great learning tools. I might also suggest finding some modeling clay or playdoh and helping her model all of the letters. Some kids have trouble with the 2D symbols of letters and do better with them when you turn them into 3D objects.

Reversals of letters and numbers are very normal through age 7, and she is only 5. But if your gut says something is off, pay attention to it. If you are still having these concerns in first grade, I would take her somewhere privately for testing.

I also wanted to add that dyslexia is much more common than people think - 15 to 20% of kids depending on the criteria used. Most teachers don't know much about it. Most people also seem to think that dyslexia is defined by reversals. Kids can actually have it without experiencing any reversals. Many experts now view dyslexia as a processing style that does make things like reading and spelling very difficult, but also comes with some amazing strengths. If your child is bright but struggling with reading, I wouldn't assume it was normal. I would stay on top of it because many schools won't intervene until they are much further behind, like in 3rd or 4th grade.

[daisysmom]

My dd just turned 6 and is in a private kindergarten. She is almost the youngest in her class (one girl is younger by a day but many kids turned 7 this spring). A lot of the reading and writing really has clicked in the last 2 months. One thing our teacher told me several times is not to push things and key him do the heavy work with her. He thought that I would run the risk of turning her off of it. It did work. I too would start by a meeting with the teacher. My dd can read. Kit, but if it is 715 at night and I lush even a simple bob book, she makes a lot of mistakes. They are really tired at that time. We working moms aren't there to see that lightbulb moment at 11 am.

[hillview]

She is 5? Um I wouldn't worry too much at that age. DS1 is 7 and reversal prone (has been for a couple of years). is she left handed?

[brittone2]

I agree that adding in games might be helpful and less stressful.

DD used Boggle Jr. a lot. Sometimes I'd have her work with the cards and spell out the words (all the words are just 3 and 4 letter words) using a variety of things: play doh formed into letters, magnetic letters, letter dice, etc. As she progressed we worked on doing it with the letters/words covered up; she would just spell from the picture (the boggle jr card holder can be set up this way).

She also enjoyed having me write a letter on an index card, and she'd match the letter/initial sound to various objects. So I'd put out a playmobile rake, a horse, a plate, etc. and she'd match up P, R, H with those PM objects. AS she progressed, we'd do things like match up cards with pig, cup, dog, etc. written on them with those PM objects (so a whole word vs. just the initial sound). We kept adding to the difficulty- eventually it was longer words, and there would be objects with the same initial sound (hat and horse, for example). Eventually we worked with simple sentences ("Brush the dog.") that involved the little PM pieces. Sometimes they were very silly and ridiculous things, which made her laugh, and tested her comprehension ;) We got increasingly complex with it. But it was fun and playful and light.

I'd keep reading a lot, talking to her about some of the phonics rules, keep exposing her to lots of rich language in books and audiobooks.

I think you should talk to the teacher because she's frustrated and having trouble completing the classroom work. It doesn't sound out of the realm of normal for a 5 yo to me, but I'm not a reading specialist by any means, and I think it is hard to know without seeing the bigger picture. If her phonemic awareness isn't where it should be, etc. than maybe they can address that. It is hard because I'm sure you don't want to miss something, and you want to stay tuned in to what is going on so you can help her...but at the same time, 5 is so young! (eta: my very early reader and natural speller DS1 had letter and number reversals at 5 and 6 for sure. It is funny looking back over some of his work where he was working ahead of grade level but still reversing. For him it was totally in the realm of normal. DD still periodically reverses, but I think DS1 did it more)

[elephantmeg]

for reading I found the "now I'm reading" books to be what it took for DS to learn to read. He HATED bob books
http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_ss_i_0_8?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=now%20i%27m%20reading&sprefix=now+I%27m+%2Caps%2C578&rh=i%3Aaps%2Ck%3Anow%20i%27m%20reading

I didn't worry much about writing until the summer after K and I put him through the "handwriting without tears" workbook over the summer. I felt that it was just too much during the school year-K was too overwhelming.

I really loved both of these-we have pretty much all the now I'm reading books now and DD has also learned to read using them on her own pretty much.

[arivecchi]

My DS just started reading in the last month or so and he does not sound out every word correctly. He still reverses letters as well. His teacher said that is normal. We are using BOB books and sight word apps on the ipad right now. One thing to keep in mind is that our kids go to half day kindy, so they are not going to be as advanced as full day kindy students. I would not be freaking out just yet. It's not an easy skill to learn but they all get there! I would keep using the ipad apps and learning books until it starts to click for her. It definitely all of a sudden started clicking for DS like a PP said, so now we are practicing more. Here they require vision tests before enrolling kids in kindy. Do they do the same in CA? In that case, you can rule that out. Talking to her teacher to get feedback is a great idea as well.

[elektra]

Thanks everyone. We did break out our set of bob books last night after a friend forwarded what bob books their Kindergartener was into. ;)
I must admit that it is super frustrating for me and worrisome to repeat something over and over and have DD not pick up on it. Even DS will eventually shout out the right answer. I am trying really hard to be patient and not let my frustration or concern show.

[squimp]

She's in K, right? How long have you been working on those Bob books? We also used the Bob books and I think they're good at the very beginning. Our kindergarten teacher taught everyone to read using a big stack of Dr. Seuss and PD Eastman books (Go, Dog, Go). I agree that at some point it will just click, but if you have been agonizing for a long time on the Bob books, I wonder if you might want to rule out some other issues. I would talk with the teacher first and get advice, so you can see if she's far outside the teacher's expectations.

[azzeps]

My daughter didn't really care much for the Bob books, although there was one that she read, when I realized she really could read... and I think she realized it too. Anyway, if she's into fairies, Barbie, Disney Princesses, whatever characters, they have early reader type books for all of those. Also, my daughter has been using a Tag reader, which we got her when she was 3, and she still loves it at 5. We have a ton of books. I think it helps with the love of books/reading. She also loves starfall.com and that doesn't come across as "drills" or "homework" but as coveted, much requested "screen time". heh heh!! Oh, and I also give a lot of credit to Word World on PBS for demonstrating the "sounding out" concept. Good luck to you, if anything, I think she's still within the range of normal. Hope you find some fun ways to reinforce what she's getting at school, etc.

[elektra]

Thanks everyone. I am not overly worried that she is outside of the normal range of learning these things. So I think she is probably later in learning these things that the average K'er but nothing abnormal at this point.
But I feel like I should be proactively helping her more. We have had those BOB books for about a year, as I got them at her preschool's scholastic sale but she never showed interest and I never pushed it.
But now I feel that I should push it a bit more. And she will love the apps I think.
And luckily DH seems to be stepping it up too and reading more with her at night. DD seems to respond to him better, and I know she likes the attention.

[niccig]

DS was same as your DD. He was getting frustrated as didn't know a word and we were getting frustrated as had read it several times already in that book.

We swapped to star fall books as he could click on the word he didn't know and it would tell him, rather than me. I just kept reading books to him. I let it go too long, it was half way into first grade before I started teaching him more at home and had him tested. He had his long and short vowels by then, but it was still just sooooooo slow going for him and he hated reading.

I know there is a range for normal, but waiting longer in DS's case wasn't going to help him. He needed explicit instruction in phonemic awareness in conjunction with more phonics work. Research is clear that poor phonemic awareness in grade 1 w/o intervention means child still has poor phonemic awareness and still a struggling reader in grade 4. Speech therapy did the phonemic awareness and I did a phonics program with DS over summer between grade 1 and grade 2. I got lucky and chose a free phonics program that was easy for me to do with him (all paper and pencil, but we used a whiteboard), and it also helped his phonemic awareness as we concentrated on one sound and all the different ways that sound can be written. DS caught on to this quickly.

I would keep an eye on things, but if you're not seeing improvement towards end of K, have her tested with reading specialist. DS just got evaluated by reading specialist and his phonemic awareness and reading now are at age level, but he's still weak in a few areas (word attack, reading rate, sight words), which she thinks is because of the later start he had with reading. We're working on catching him up so it won't come back to be a problem later on. DS's teacher thinks his reading is fine as he has made a huge jump and is at grade level, but I'm not willing to wait and see if the other areas improve. They may very will, but the demands are more in grade 3, and I've seen how his improved reading has made spelling and writing much easier for him.

[bisous]

Does her school have a reading specialist? It could be normal and things just haven't clicked yet.

My mom taught K for years. I don't know anything about dyslexia or other problems some of the PP mentioned. I do know that it is normal for young fives not to "get" reading yet. Barring any special problems, she will get it when she is ready. My mom always says it is developmental. She says she gives the skills (and she is highly trained in reading acquisition) phonemic awareness, phonics, sight words, etc which you are doing and waits for the pieces to fall into place.

FWIW, DS1 was not an early reader. He really "got it" in mid 1st grade but he quickly surpassed other kids his age and is now the top reader in the class. We just didn't stress but kept up with stuff like you are doing. Especially we read to him all the time.

I would just not stress about it too much. If you are concerned you can ask for evaluations but I don't think what you are mentioning sounds outside of normal. Just keep reading books and developing a love of books. I cannot believe how far that has brought DS1.

[egoldber]

Honestly, I think 5 is too young to be worried about it. Many, many 5 year olds are not reading yet at all. And I think too much help can just make some kids stressed when they simply are not developmentally ready.


she is needing to be able to do this in order to complete her work (ex. filling in the blank in a sentence)

So I'm asking the following because my K kid gets similar work. She seldom if ever fully completes any of these activities. My understanding is that they are for practice and the kids are just supposed to do as much as they can and they are not necessarily expected to completely finish the activity. They want them to practice writing as much as they can, but it isn't expected that they will always finish or always know the correct word to write.