DH work travel at 38 weeks

[ncat]

DH - please understand why I am nervous and upset that you plan to spend a week in Europe when I am 38 weeks pregnant. Just because our first two babies were born at 41 weeks does not mean that this one will be as well. And perhaps I do not want to be a single parent for a week when I am very, very pregnant.

[belovedgandp]

Oh no. That is so not cool. Time to start bribing your OB to issue all sorts of cautionary warnings?

[StantonHyde]

This is the problem with having subsequent children--DHs think--oh DW can do this, we've done it before, its easy. umm, no, its not. We just make it look that way!!!!

[elliput]

Not cool. :irked: I'd be asking DH what all of his backup plans are for if you go into labor. Who has he arranged to watch your other DC, who is going to be with you at the hospital/birth center, what are his plans for returning early, who is going to help you the week he is gone, etc.

[JBaxter]

Not cool at all. Even my husband said Man he should know better than that. Our babies were born at 41 weeks but he declined all travel after 36 weeks < well non drive-able travel>

[sarahsthreads]

Nope, that would not fly in our house. (Though I tend to deliver a week or so early every time.)

Our current...conflict...is that DH goes to an annual conference overseas (for business) that will be at most 3-4 weeks after DC3 is born. So it would be me alone for an entire week with three kids (one brand new, two that need to get on and off a bus in a timely fashion and to and from whatever extra-curricular activities, not to mention it's the week of both kids' back-to-school nights and they're both going to be in new schools with unfamiliar teachers) and a dog. I know at 3-4 weeks pp I am not going to be able to hold down the fort entirely by myself for a week. I certainly couldn't have with either DD1 or DD2, and I don't see how adding a 3rd child in there is going to make things smoother? He has this rosy memory of that time being so easy and wonderful that is so far from reality it's laughable.

Someone needs to knock some sense into both of our DHs!

Sarah :)

[georgiegirl]

Not cool at all. I told DH no more traveling starting at 34 weeks.

[Giantbear]

homeboy needs to stay at home.

[PZMommy]

No way! I'd be livid. I delivered my first at 38 weeks and my second at 36 weeks.

And for the other poster who said hers is traveling when the baby is a few weeks old, I'd be furious over that one too. I recall being so sleep deprived by that point I could hardly function, much less take care of a toddler and a newborn by myself.

I hope both of your DHs come to their senses in time!

[kaharris83]

I hope your DH changes his mind. DS1 was born at 39w5d and I was in complete denial that DS2 would be born before at least that time and didn't do anything to get ready for his arrival, thinking I still had weeks to go. He came at 37w5d.

Even if baby doesn't come while he would be gone the stress of the possibility of baby arriving at any time while he's gone would be too much for me to handle. Hoping your DH comes to his senses quickly.

[hillview]

yeah even here that'd be a no go. SORRY

[mikala]

Yikes. DS1 arrived on his due date. I went into labor with DS2 at 37.5 weeks. I didn't have any pg complications either time and even my OB was startled when I called to tell her I was in labor with DS2.

Moral of the story...past uterus performance does not guarantee future uterus performance. Is there any way to reschedule the trip or do it remotely?

I also sympathize with PP whose husband will be gone right after baby's born. For me that time was a haze of feed/sleep/poop/attempt to keep the older kid from burning the house down while you take care of baby.

[belovedgandp]

Chiming in on the leaving with new little ones. DH ended up out of the country for 11 days when DC3 was 10 days old. Missed half of first three weeks of life. Then was home for 4 days and left again. I was so PO'd at DH right after DC3 first birthday when a friend pointed out I was probably suffering from a form of PTSD on the anniversary of that awful time. It sounds extreme, but it was that bad. I have flash backs to those nights with three 6, 2 1/2 and 2 weeks and it was BAD.

[crl]

For the out of town right after birth, I'd be explaining how much help needs to hired to make that happen. Night nurse, day time baby sitters, grocery delivery.

Catherine

[flashy09]

I would throw a fit. Not only is that a full term, very possible delivery window, but you don't need to be a single parent at that time. Also it's an exciting, nerve wracking, full of emotion time and your DH should share in some of that! Not the time to leave at all. Tell him I said so!