What would you say? Weird conversation with a friend....

[Myira]

A very trivial thing but something just keeps bothering me about it...

A friend calls me on Saturday morning and leaves a voice message asking if I'd like to join her for shopping after 2 missed calls so total 3 calls from her and message on the last call.

DH was out for the day for a conference and I was busy with the kids, did not hear my cell ring or no idea if one of them was playing with it. I see all those missed calls and message only in the evening at which point there is no way to go shopping and lazy me does not return her call right then. I forget to return her call on Sunday as well.

She meets me today and says " Hey I called you and my call was cut twice did XXX(my husband's name) cut it? Whoa I am stumped....I say no and explain how I was with the kids etc and sorry about not returning her call. But she then goes on to say she wondered if my husband cut the calls because we were having a fight or something??? Since I am too shocked to speak I say nothing.

I am a bit mad I did not say something and am tempted to go call her out on this but thought I'd get another perspective.
What is all this aspersion casting on my hubby? Is it stemming from the fact that I may have confided some issues between DH and me to her a while ago? What do you think? If you guys think she was just trying to shame me I am going to call her off. What should I do?

[misshollygolightly]

Based on what you've said, I honestly doubt she meant to be insulting or to insinuate anything. It sounds like she was (justifiably) puzzled by not one but two dropped calls and simply wanted to make sure everything was ok. She may also have been fishing a little to find out whether you were intentionally avoiding her by cutting her calls and not responding to the message. If I were you, I'd probably thank her for her invitation and her concern, apologize for not responding (extremely busy, knew you'd understand, yada yada), and then suggest another time to get together. Unless she's ordinarily a passive-aggressive type or a drama-creator, I don't think there's anything particularly sinister in her questions. Sounds like she just wants to check on you and make sure you're not upset with her or avoiding her for some reason.

[s7714]

Strange. Assuming the details you shared with her weren't inclusive of him doing that sort of thing, I'd probably just say something along the lines of "You said something the other day about DH cutting off calls from you. It's really been bothering me that you're under the impression something like that would happen!" and see what she says from there.

[lhafer]

Based on what you've said, I honestly doubt she meant to be insulting or to insinuate anything. It sounds like she was (justifiably) puzzled by not one but two dropped calls and simply wanted to make sure everything was ok. She may also have been fishing a little to find out whether you were intentionally avoiding her by cutting her calls and not responding to the message. If I were you, I'd probably thank her for her invitation and her concern, apologize for not responding (extremely busy, knew you'd understand, yada yada), and then suggest another time to get together. Unless she's ordinarily a passive-aggressive type or a drama-creator, I don't think there's anything particularly sinister in her questions. Sounds like she just wants to check on you and make sure you're not upset with her or avoiding her for some reason.

:yeahthat:

Perhaps your phone was off or out of battery? I know when my phone is off or out of battery (or my DH's phone as we have the same phone), it rings and then goes straight to voice mail. If it's on, it rings forever before going to voice mail.

[baileygirl]

Maybe if the kids answered the phone, there was something going on in the background (i.e. tv) that concerned her?

[MMMommy]

Based on what you've said, I honestly doubt she meant to be insulting or to insinuate anything. It sounds like she was (justifiably) puzzled by not one but two dropped calls and simply wanted to make sure everything was ok. She may also have been fishing a little to find out whether you were intentionally avoiding her by cutting her calls and not responding to the message. If I were you, I'd probably thank her for her invitation and her concern, apologize for not responding (extremely busy, knew you'd understand, yada yada), and then suggest another time to get together. Unless she's ordinarily a passive-aggressive type or a drama-creator, I don't think there's anything particularly sinister in her questions. Sounds like she just wants to check on you and make sure you're not upset with her or avoiding her for some reason.

:yeahthat: I find it a tad odd that she mentioned your DH in the matter, but overall I wouldn't think much of it. She was probably just trying to piece together the reasons for the dropped calls and not hearing from you.

[sunshine873]

Maybe she's experienced that kind of thing with her own DH, so that's why she jumped to that conclusion? I guess I'd be inclined to just let the issue die.