Go the _____ to sleep!

[lalasmama]

Dwaddling. Lolly-gagging. Stalling. Goofing off. Off task.

No matter what I call it, it annoys the heck out if me, which means DD is pushing my cranky buttons more and more lately.

We've tried reminders. We've tried ignoring. We've tried up earlier. We've tried up later. We've tried early to bed. We've tried late to bed. We've tried positive reinforcement. She swam for 2 hours yesterday, claimed she was tired, and still refused to sleep at bedtime. She's so overtired she can't function.

She's flat refusing sleep. No idea exactly what time she's getting to sleep, but she's got huge bags under her eyes, and this morning she admitted that she's playing after we put her to bed. Of note, she's always been a big sleeper--"a __ year old should sleep x-y hours a night" and she was always that y value.

Thanks for letting me whine. SO doesn't have to deal with her like this, and doesn't "get" it....

[BabbyO]

I can totally empathize. Stachio was doing the exact same thing....he'd be awake after DH and I would go to bed many nights. We were able to help the situation by cutting his PM nap...but seems like you may not have that option. I hope it gets better soon!

I know this is the BP, but I thought I'd add that I HAVE to read before I go to bed. It is the only thing that settles my mind enough for me to sleep - otherwise it just races and I can't sleep. Could something similar be going on with your DD?

[amom526]

This is already DS1 at age 2. UGGHHH I know how maddening this is. This is why he is going to be in his crib for a long long tine, because at least then he is contained.

Although I imagine different factors are at play for a 9 year old than a 2 year old.

[niccig]

DS does this too. Takes forever to get the bedtime routine done and then he won't settle down once he is in his bed. He's 8. I don't want to have to march him through everything, but I think I may need to.

Once I said to him "the longer you take to go to sleep, the less time Mummy has to study, so I'll have to stay up later, and I'll be tired tomorrow and you know I get cranky when I'm tired, so you'll have to deal with a cranky Mummy." He said "yes, you do get cranky, I'll got to sleep now" and he did. But it only worked once.

[MamaMolly]

IME sleep begets sleep. It can be an ugly cycle once my Lula gets off track.

Could there be a biological reason? When Lula's allergies are flaring (like now) I give her Allegra, and we finally figured out she sleeps the best while taking it if she has only one tsp. a day, first thing in the morning. Her allergist said to give it to her at night but it wasn't allowing her to fall asleep.

Or how about melatonin?

[StantonHyde]

Have you tried the Sleep Fairy CD?? It has revolutionized bed time for us and for many others on this Board--plus the people to whom I recommended it. It's only sold on the Sleep Fairy CD web site. Best money I ever spent (like maybe $20).

[BunnyBee]

Calms Forte or Melatonin?

[lalasmama]

This is already DS1 at age 2. UGGHHH I know how maddening this is. This is why he is going to be in his crib for a long long tine, because at least then he is contained.

Although I imagine different factors are at play for a 9 year old than a 2 year old.

I don't know if there are different factors, really, LOL! Your 2 year old wants to be in charge of things just like my 9 year old, I imagine! I think that's a lot of what is keeping her up--just the persuit of control.


DS does this too. Takes forever to get the bedtime routine done and then he won't settle down once he is in his bed. He's 8. I don't want to have to march him through everything, but I think I may need to.

Once I said to him "the longer you take to go to sleep, the less time Mummy has to study, so I'll have to stay up later, and I'll be tired tomorrow and you know I get cranky when I'm tired, so you'll have to deal with a cranky Mummy." He said "yes, you do get cranky, I'll got to sleep now" and he did. But it only worked once.

I have to walk her through her morning routine, because she's so tired she can't function. ... As well as her bedtime routine. "DD, you have 2 minutes to brush your teeth. You already pooped, so there's no reason you should be in the bathroom with the door closed for longer than 2 minutes!" "DD, are your pajamas on yet? Have you peed yet?" And on and on and on it goes, until I go downstiars to oversee.

Funny about the cranky-mommy comment, because we had this discussion this morning with my DD! "DD, I can't get to sleep until you get to sleep. And when you are up and singing at 4am, that wakes me up at 4am, too. So, the less you sleep, the more noise you make. And the more noise you make, the less I sleep. What happens when people don't get the sleep they need?" "They get cranky." "Right! And you're keeping me from sleeping! And you aren't sleeping! How does that make us feel?" "We're both cranky!" "And how can we stop this?" "I could go to sleep on time and get sleep, and then neither of us would be cranky." "So why don't you want to do that?" Which is met with complete silence, usually.


IME sleep begets sleep. It can be an ugly cycle once my Lula gets off track.

Could there be a biological reason? When Lula's allergies are flaring (like now) I give her Allegra, and we finally figured out she sleeps the best while taking it if she has only one tsp. a day, first thing in the morning. Her allergist said to give it to her at night but it wasn't allowing her to fall asleep.

Or how about melatonin?

We've tried melatonin with very limited effect. At this point, I tuck her into bed, and within minutes, generally, she is up and playing, from what she's finally admitted. Not *always* out of bed, but often. She won't sleep with the door open, though, so we can't leave it a little open to disuade her from playing... I can't come up with anything else that would be causing it--other than being overtired! Like you said, sleep begets sleep, and she's so far gone, I don't think she *can* get to sleep when she needs right now. Obviously, I just hit a wall this morning with it!


Have you tried the Sleep Fairy CD?? It has revolutionized bed time for us and for many others on this Board--plus the people to whom I recommended it. It's only sold on the Sleep Fairy CD web site. Best money I ever spent (like maybe $20).

Will look into the Sleep Fairy CD. Haven't heard of it, and at this point, I'm willing to try just about anything!

After her admitting that she's playing with toys and such after bedtime, I told her I would be removing her toys for now. She can earn them back as she makes good choices, but, for now, they won't be in her room at all at bed time.

[EllasMum]

I feel your pain! At night, I have to lay down with DD or she claims she can't fall asleep. We are working on weaning her off of this - had actually done it but then I went away for a week and Grandma reinstated it. Sigh. So we are back to doing that and some nights DD takes FOREVER to fall asleep. Think more like the 30-45 minute range. Argh. I did get some Calms Forte that a PP mentioned and they do seem to help her fall asleep faster. I still treasure our 'nighttime talks' (chat about the day, school, whatever comes up) but really need to get out of the laying down business.

Um, sorry to hijack with my own b*tch! ;) Do try the Calms Forte. I used to buy the kids version but then accidentally bought the adult version. We had used it for at least a week with no negative effects, before I figured it out, so we are continuing to use it. I refer to it as her 'sleeping medicine' and she seems to actually like taking it. I don't really care if it is psychosomatic - it seems to do the trick.

Good luck with your DD!

[boogiemom]

:-/ so frustrating. I'd have toys and books out of her room. Also, however long she is taking from your day/evening because she is distracting you and/or keeping you up would be the amount of time she owes you in the evening and/or weekend. She'd have to lay quietly in her room for that amount of time. Or maybe do chores (I like dusting baseboards for my boys.) for that amount of time because you were busy dealing with her or so tired because she kept you up that you are too tired to do it yourself.

Good luck!