Home alone as of what age?

[kozachka]

At what age would you be comfortable leaving you DC alone for more than just a short period of time? I understand that it depends on how mature your child is and where you live, so please answer based on your circumstances. DS is 9.5 and I begged me to leave him at home today while I headed to a theater performance in the city, rather than have him stay with my mom. I was a latch key child as of at least 8 years of age, so think he is more than ready but wonder how he'd react / what other people would think if they knew I did it.

[Jen841]

We started @ 9.5 with grocery trips and me doing karate drop off and pick up for no. 2. He calls me a lot.

[sarahsthreads]

Our parks & rec department has a "Home Alone Safely" class that they offer for 7-12 year olds. I'm planning to have DD1 attend that and then try her out this summer for short drop-off/pickups when DD2 has a little summer camp that DD1 doesn't. She'll be a couple of months shy of 9. I tried to look up a legal minimum age to stay home and couldn't find one?

I think for something as long as a theater performance where she wouldn't have easy access to call me if something came up, though, I'd have to say closer to 11 or 12.

We live in a pretty safe neighborhood and, in fact, live next door to a sheriff who conspicuously parks his car at the end of his driveway, so my concern for her safety is more whether she'd hurt herself trying to cook or something rather than worrying that someone would break in.

Sarah :)

[SnuggleBuggles]

Ds1 is almost 11 and I still wouldn't leave for more than an hour. He just isn't comfortable yet. I don't know when.

[hellokitty]

Ds1 is 9.5 yr old too. I've thought about it. For something quick, like running out to get something at the store (we live with 5 min of all of the big shopping in our area so a quick errand would be 15-20 min round trip), he'd probably be ok. However, it would just be him (no younger sibs) and I need to either reactivate out landline or getting a third line on our cell phone plan, so he at least can call is if needed. Henie the type of kid who would just read, watch tv or play on the computer while we were gone. However, I really think that this is on an individual case. I would probably trust ds2 by age 9 as well. However, ds3 who is almost 4, but my wildest and craziest kid. Idk if I can ever trust him alone!

[JBaxter]

9.5 I do and hour or so. He has specific rules he must follow Stay in the house lock the door answer on the 1st ring no friends over dont answer the door.

[BabyBearsMom]

My parents would leave me for 20 or 30 minutes at around 9. I think I was 11 before it was over an hour. I would check your state laws though. I think our state has a rule about it before age 12

[AnnieW625]

Haven't gotten there yet, but by the time I was 9 or 10 I could stay at home for an hour or so when my parents went to do something. We however knew all of our neighbors and lived in a 10 house cul-de-sac so in many cases someone was always home as we had a few retires and SAHMs in the area so my mom always told someone I was home alone. I am thinking 10 or so for quick trip to the market for my Dd1.

DH was a latch key kid along with his brother. I believe he started at 7 yrs. old, but his brother was 12. His grandparents and other family members were 10 minutes or less away if need be. By the time my DH was 10 or 11 though he was home alone because my BIL was 15 or 16 and had an after school job or sports practice.

[crl]

I leave my nine year old alone while I am in the neighborhood--like dd s riding her trike up and down the street. I'm not good with being truly gone yet. I worry that he would try to save the dog instead of getting out in case of fire or that he would hurt himself trying to cook in the toaster oven.

Catherine

[KrisM]

DS just turned 9. I leave him for 30-45 min if I'm around town. He's asked for longer, and would likely be fine, but I don't think he's old enough.

[vludmilla]

[QUOTE=sarahsthreads;3800625. I tried to look up a legal minimum age to stay home and couldn't find one?

[/QUOTE]

There is no minimum age to stay home alone in NYS, according to Child Protective laws though there are minimums in other states.

[Beth24]

DD started at 9.5 as well. But for short periods of time...I think she's been alone for an hour max.

[wendmatt]

DD is 10 and I started letting her stay home for a short time recently. I had a class that didn't get me home until 20 mins after she got off the bus (which is right outside our house in a gated community) so she would come in and I'd call as soon as I got out of class as she was walking in the door and I'd be home shortly after.

[Nooknookmom]

We started @ 9.5 with grocery trips and me doing karate drop off and pick up for no. 2. He calls me a lot.

Ditto here. Didnt have cell for DD1 way back then ;). The next year at 10 and 5th grade she stayed home a lot more and did have her first cell for calling me or dad.

[egoldber]

I started leaving older DD for short periods of time (run to CVs to get a scrip, drop a letter in the mail at the post office 5 minutes awa, etc.) when she was 8/9.

Starting at 10, we would leave her for an hour or so.

She is now almost 12 and we have led ther home alone for 2 to 3 hours.

That being said, I am personally uncomfortable with a daily, long term, latch key situation because that is when kids tend to get into trouble and try out risky behaviors.

[StantonHyde]

9.5 I do and hour or so. He has specific rules he must follow Stay in the house lock the door answer on the 1st ring no friends over dont answer the door.

This has been my standard. I leave them to go for an hour long run/swim or if I am getting his sister from school. DD is ok being with DS alone but not by herself.

When I was 11-and very mature--my parents started leaving us alone while they went out to dinner for a few hours etc. When DS is 11, I could probably see leaving him for 2 hours during the day, but not at night based on his maturity, needs, etc.

So I would say that leaving him while you went to a theatre performance would be a no go for me at this point. Maybe when he is 11.

[brittone2]

DS1 is 9 and we are considering short stints. In the fall I may let him stay home for 30 mins or so when I run to drop DD off at dance and drive home again (DH will pick up on his way home from work). He's thrilled he doesn't have to go ;)

[s7714]

9 for my oldest DD. Only a hour or two here and there with lots of check ins both ways. She's now 10 and loves to be left at home alone.

Out of necessity I left my almost 8 year old home alone for a few minutes the other week while I ran to pick up/drop off my oldest. She had the stomach flu and dragging her along just seemed more ridiculous than leaving her alone for 30 minute stints. I'd never leave both my DDs alone together however as they'd probably do bodily harm to each other before I returned!

[Indianamom2]

I found this site which was helpful and had a state by state listing:

http://www.latchkey-kids.com/latchkey-kids-age-limits.htm

[kbud]

I have to laugh because the guideline on the chart for FL is 18!!! Really? It's so ironic too because once a child turns 4 in FL he/she does not need to be in a carseat or booster.

[hillview]

DS1 I leave in the house when I am down the street with DS2 riding his bike (DS1 is almost 8) but it will be another year+ before I leave him alone for a longer time. he is very well behaved. DS2, maybe when he is 18 :)

[erosenst]

We started leaving DD alone for short periods at 8.25ish. We can get to grocery and back for quick pickup in 20 minutes, and did it when DH or I was out of town and the other needed something.

She did great and was comfortable, so it relatively quickly increased to an hour or so. She's now 9.5, and I think the longest has been 90 minutes. We still don't leave her alone at night - although if something came up and I had to run to store, would do it. Just not comfortable, for some reason, with a longer period even though we're in a very safe area.

She almost never calls for anything while we're gone. She can fix herself a snack, take care of basic needs, doesn't go out of the house/answer the door, knows what to do if we don't come home at expected time, etc.

Having said all of that - it TOTALLY depends on the kid IMHO.

[indigo99]

At age 10, I was walking half a mile to/from school each day and staying alone for a few hours each afternoon until my mother came home from work. That seems so young to me now, but I was a mature child. My state recommends age 10 as the minimum, but we'll see whether or not my boys are ready at that age.

[JBaxter]

Oh man SC has NONE. Do you know how easy it would be to actually let Jack sleep when I run Nathan to school ( 1.2 miles)? And it would be LEGAL. He's the only 4 yr I know who will sleep to 9 or 10 if you don't wake him up. If I only had the nerve.

[kozachka]

Thank you for all the feedback, ladies. I've been leaving DS for short periods of time (= around an hour or less) for probably a year now, and he's been fine. At this point I would not think twice about leaving him for 2-2.5 hours during the day, he'd just read books and play Legos. He does have has his Dad's cell phone and an iPad, and knows how to call me on Skype from it. I was wondering more about the longer periods of time, say 3-5 hours. Sounds like the consensus is 11-12 years of age, even though there are no legal limits in CA. Good to know.

P.S. I took two modes of public transportation to school (the only one in town where you could study English as of 1st grade at the time) for an hour each way since we moved, I was 8.25 at the time. So I feel more comfortable trusting DS, especially since he's previously demonstrated that nothing goes wrong when I left him home for progressively longer periods of time to run errands that he had no interest in accompanying me for.

[MontrealMum]

I was a latchkey kid from about age 10 or so. But that was in a mid-sized town in a close knit neighborhood. I was babysitting for other people's kids from age 12. But for DS? I'd say at least 12, ballpark. It's hard to know as he's only 5.5, but many of my 12-14 yo students still have nannies (with no younger siblings) so that is influencing my opinion in part. We live in a big city, and it just feels so foreign to how I grew up. There are so many factors that differ from my own childhood that it makes me wary. Even though they may not necessarily make things less safe it's "different" and I don't feel comfortable with leaving him on his own earlier. Mind you, SIL took the city bus cross-town starting in the 1st grade to school here in Mtl. In the 60's, but still. Not something that would have happened in my hometown! So I get that this may be about me, and not DS or where we live.

I will say, though, that a great local support network of neighbors and friends' parents are certainly a factor, and we are working at fostering those connections because I think they're incredibly important. Our downstairs neighbors both work FT but I would feel very comfortable with DS going to them in an emergency for help. It's that sort of thing that I think really colors my opinion on at what age DS can stay home alone, and what time of day (ie, when neighbors are home).