The old "If you don't have anything nice to say..."

[crayonblue]

After an exhausting search for a rental house close to the beach in SoCal, we finally found one! Yay! The owner approved us and we are set. It's a lovely home. It has it's negatives but the positives are really appealing...1 mile from the beach, walking distance to downtown area, a mile to preschool and bus stop for DD1. Just convenient in every way. It's newish and allergen free (DH is deadly allergic to cats) and just as cute as can be.

But, it's small. Small rooms. We needed four rooms (DH works from home some and needed a dedicated office). This house was the ONLY one in the entire area that gave us four bedrooms for a "reasonable" price.

So, I sent a link of the place to a friend who I thought would be interested in seeing what we found. Her response, "WOW, those rooms are TINY!!!!! It will be like living in an apartment."

Well, gosh, really? You in your big ass Texas house. I think a whole lot of people need to live in CA for a while so they can learn to keep their mouths shut about housing sizes and prices.

I KNOW we are going to get a LOT of these types of comments from people used to sprawling lots and large houses. The house will be too small, the yard too small, the traffic noise too loud, the parking situation a pain, etc.

DH would say she's just jealous! But, it still put a damper on how excited I was today.

Whatever happened to "If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all?"

[crl]

How annoying. Location definitely trumps size for quality of life in my book so it sounds like you found a winner! (Not meant as a dig at living in TX, meant as in location related to school commute, beach, etc.)

Catherine

[jgenie]

Sorry she wasn't excited for you.

So happy you found a house that works for you and is close to your DDs schools!!!

[crayonblue]

How annoying. Location definitely trumps size for quality of life in my book so it sounds like you found a winner! (Not meant as a dig at living in TX, meant as in location related to school commute, beach, etc.)

Catherine

Exactly! Driving all over tarnation is not my idea of fun.

We lived in a townhouse in MD before our current house here and got the same kind of comments. Even as far as, "I could never live in a townhouse." So, it was quite refreshing to live in a "big" house here and not get those comments. Now we are going back to smaller and I am mentally preparing myself...Maybe I should just say, "Well, you're just jealous you can't walk to the beach!"

Ha.

[momm]

Sheesh.
You cannot have a mansion near a beach.. Simple as that!!

[elektra]

It sounds awesome! Location, baby!

[specialp]

Who wants to stay inside a big bedroom and stare at 4 walls when they have a beach down the road?

It sounds like a great place, great locations and perfect for you!

[AngelaS]

I'm excited for you! :)

[wellyes]

What a classless loser.
Your place sounds wonderful - hope you enjoy it!

[SnuggleBuggles]

Didn't you say in another post that it was 1700 sq. ft? If so, that is a perfectly fine size house! It sounds awesome. Location sounds amazing.

People should travel more to developing nations or large cities and see home sizes. Yeesh.

[ahisma]

We live in a pretty small house (by choice). I would happily move to a smaller house to be near the ocean. In a heartbeat.

Some of our friends can't believe that we purposefully live in a smaller house than we could buy in a different, more suburban, area. Their houses are nice, but I'd be miserable living in their neighborhoods. I need a home in a walkable area or I'd lose my mind. I love that my car can be parked for a straight week without any real effort.

Your place sounds awesome! She truly doesn't get it. Her loss, for sure.

[♥ms.pacman♥]

Eek, what a beeyotch. Who says stuff like that??? So sorry. Don't let that put a damper on your excitement. That place sounds awesome. As they always say in real estate... location, location,location. we are planning to move in a few years so we can be closer to work/downtown, even though it will likely mean a smaller house.

Your DH is right, she's just probably jealous ...it's as hot as h*LL here right now. To a comment like that, i would want to respond with "Yeah, it is a bit on the small side. But it's a mile from the beach, within walking distance from school and downtown so I think the outside more than makes up for it." And i would totally want to add "DId you know it was 76 (or whatever) degrees today? " Or "how far is *your* house from the beach ?" :icon_twisted: Ok maybe i wouldn't say all that but i would totally want to.

[BunnyBee]

Less to clean and you can walk to the beach? Score! Phooey on her and her big ass :rotflmao: Texas house.

[KpbS]

I don't understand why people feel the need to have giant spaces. It really is more to furnish and clean. And most importantly, it's none of her business how big/small your house is! You needed 4 rooms in your area, you found it! That's awesome!!

[twowhat?]

I'd respond right back "I know*!! Isn't it great?? We are SO excited!"

*sorry, no room for you to stay when you visit

[Rainbows&Roses]

I turned a small dining room into a bedroom, slept on the floor and lived with four other people in a 2 bedroom/1 bathroom apt to live close to the beach in Southern California, so I agree with your DH - they are just jealous.

[joules]

Horay! I'm glad you found a place! Sorry your friend is so clueless. I'm hoping she just typed it without thinking? I have a friend that makes comments like that a lot. I just try and brush it off because she *is* quite clueless sometimes....but it still hurts sometimes.

DH's bff lives in Texas (bff used to live in SoCal too). In the middle of the summer, DH likes to say things to him like: "omg it's sooooo hot here today. It's like 79 degrees!"

[Still-in-Shock]

Just so you know, I live in a small house in Texas. LOL
It was just me and the cat, and then DH moved in. People have asked if we will move now that we have a baby on the way, but why should we? We back up to the school! I have a playground in walking distance! And the smaller size means that we have more money to do other things, as well as less to clean.

Enjoy your beach house! Ignore your short-sighted friend's silly comment, and be sure to send her pictures of your family doing fun things.

[WatchingThemGrow]

So excited you found a newish rental with 4 br! So excited for you!!! ignore her.

[edurnemk]

I'd respond with "I know! Less space to clean, so I'll have more time to hang out at the beach! Isn't it great?"

Your friend was very rude.

[liz]

I'd respond right back "I know*!! Isn't it great?? We are SO excited!"

*sorry, no room for you to stay when you visit

this made me lol :rotflmao:

Congratulations on your new home :cheerleader1:!!!

[TwinFoxes]

Be sure to email her your weather forecasts when it's 73 and gorgeous in July...how hot do you think it will be outside her big-ass Texas house? There's nothing like beach living.

And I hear you about out of state folks not getting SoCal real estate prices. Our 2 bedroom house in West LA cost twice what my SIL's midwest McMansion cost. But I wouldn't have traded! (I'm sure the feeling was mutual!)

[brittone2]

What a classless loser.
Your place sounds wonderful - hope you enjoy it!
:yeahthat:

I remember buying our first home in our mid 20s and having my brother tell me how it was "nice for a starter home." Um....thanks? Super awesome of you to say it in such a way. The same brother has declared bankruptcy several times and bought two houses way out of his league and was foreclosed on. Life is complicated, and that can happen to anyone in the wrong circumstances. But yeah, super nice to judge me for buying a house we could afford in a nice neighborhood that we went on to make a sweet profit off of.

I think everyone sticks their foot in their mouth sometimes, but you just don't insult someone's *home*!

Your new place sounds fabulous!

[dogmom]

I would remind her of the supply/demand issue. Apparently your area is more in demand that hers and she should wonder why her house is so big for so little money. Nothing is free people.

[crayonblue]

Didn't you say in another post that it was 1700 sq. ft? If so, that is a perfectly fine size house! It sounds awesome. Location sounds amazing.

People should travel more to developing nations or large cities and see home sizes. Yeesh.

Yes, 1700 sq. ft.

[crayonblue]

Your DH is right, she's just probably jealous ...it's as hot as h*LL here right now. To a comment like that, i would want to respond with "Yeah, it is a bit on the small side. But it's a mile from the beach, within walking distance from school and downtown so I think the outside more than makes up for it." And i would totally want to add "DId you know it was 76 (or whatever) degrees today? " Or "how far is *your* house from the beach ?" :icon_twisted: Ok maybe i wouldn't say all that but i would totally want to.

Just for fun, I looked. High of 75 for us this week. High of 99 for her. Hee.

[crayonblue]

DH's bff lives in Texas (bff used to live in SoCal too). In the middle of the summer, DH likes to say things to him like: "omg it's sooooo hot here today. It's like 79 degrees!"

It IS fun to say things like that!!! I TRY not to but sometimes I just can't resist! Ha ha!

[crayonblue]

Thanks everyone. I feel better. :) Our "plan" is to rent here for 2-3 years and then buy. But plans never seem to work quite like I have in mind, so we shall see!

[icunurse]

Some people need to have big things (or shiny things) to feel better about themselves. And that's fine. Just don't let them rain on your parade. You have the ocean for a backyard! You have important things convenient to you. And your family loves each other so much that you don't want to put tons of space between each other. Sounds great to me! Enjoy your new space!

[Tenasparkl]

1700 sq feet near the beach sounds great! I've got a little less space than that & a long drive to the beach also here in SoCal. Enjoy the new place!

[schrocat]

1700 sq ft in California near the beach is nothing to scoff at. I've had comments from friends living in Houston too. I just shrug it off. We have better scenery here in Seattle anyday.

[mommylamb]

Just tell her it's a trade off- smaller house for a better life style- and since you're not too materialistic, the size is fine for you.

Of course, that doesn't really fit your "if you can't say anything nice" motto. Then again, I say, If you can't say anything nice, come sit by me ;).

[trales]

1700 sq ft. is not small, I consider that mid-large. We have 1426sq ft and it is just fine, I guess that is just east coast living. You can be outside 90%of the time, in really nice weather, not too hot, great breezes and play on the beach, sure beats the heat of TX in a huge A/C house with no fresh air.

[babystuffbuff]

Congrats on finding a house that is a great fit for your family! And sorry about your friend's thoughtless comment. We live in DC and our place is tiny, but we are within a block of six different restaurants, three blocks from the train station, and there is a great corner shop across the street where we can pick up pretty much any grocery item if we can't get to the store. Convenience is so much more important than size. :)

[Tondi G]

UUGH! That's annoying. Don't let it get you down! I've lived in CA my whole life ... when I visit other places with their HUGE rooms and properties I can help but think .... Those rooms are HUGE and then quietly think to myself .... that much more to have to keep clean!!!

I'm glad you guys found a house with all the specs you wanted!

[nfowife]

Um, there's a reason it's so cheap to live in TX. And where I just moved from (OK). Because it's hot as balls, cold and wet in the winter, flat with no scenery, and nowhere good to go on a road trip within a reasonable drive. So, the reason is, it stinks and that's why it's cheap! Enjoy your new home by the beach! It's worth it!

[Reader]

1700 sf is plenty of space. We use about that much (don't use our basement at the moment) for our family of 5 in CA.

[sunnyside]

Sorry to hear they rained on your parade. I know I was excited to move into a condo a long time ago and showed it to my friend, only to have her ask me how on earth I would survive with only one drawer in the kitchen. (There were cabinets, too). Some people just can never be positive!

[kara97210]

Your new home sounds lovely - congrats! Your friend was definitely being rude. It would be one thing if you had sent her a list of homes you were thinking about renting and asked what she thought of them, but it's just mean to be critical of the place you've decided to move into. And to me 1700 sq ft, near the beach, sounds pretty perfect to me.

[arivecchi]

1,700 near the beach in California trumps a McMansion in 99-degree Texas any day! (sorry to the Texans on the boards!)

[bisous]

1700 square feet sounds great. Not even small to me. I'm sure you'll make it look lovely and that makes all the difference. I like being in a small space because I feel like every square inch is being used and beautified. And you simply must take into account the easy access to the out of doors. There is so much living out there!

Don't worry about your friend a minute longer. I wonder if she is regretting her thoughtless remarks? Maybe she was just thinking ahead for you about storage solutions? Maybe she really does this your find is remarkable, she was just a bit clueless about expressing her admiration?

Your place sounds perfect for you. Wishes for the least stressful move and fun decorating and organizing your new place. The location sounds amazing!

[MontrealMum]

I'd respond right back "I know*!! Isn't it great?? We are SO excited!"

*sorry, no room for you to stay when you visit

:yeahthat:

Congratulations on your new home, and poo to your clueless friend. We also live in a super small home. On the water. It's wonderful :)

[crayonblue]

OK, you guys are going to think I am crazy (or crazier than I really am) but we ended up turning down the house.

Long story but we didn't feel good about it and our current landlord confirmed our concerns.

Soooooo, I cried a lot yesterday cause this is an overwhelming process.

Got up today and looked at the listings and saw a new one. Called the guy and drove over and OH MY GOSH!!!!!!!! Unobstructed view of the ocean from the entire back of the house which is all windows. Completely gutted and will be done in a month. Can you guys please pray that the landlord will choose us...if this is the right house for us??? He is going to get a TON of applications over the next few days based on the location, view and price. Still a "small" house but with those views, I'll camp out in the backyard if I have to!!! :)

[crl]

Best of luck!
Catherine

[baymom]

Good luck!!!!

[Still-in-Shock]

THis does sound like a better place - hoping it comes through!