push presents

[megs4413]

is this something you traditionally do or are planning to do? We haven't done it before, but DH brought it up yesterday and said that he wanted me to be thinking of one. I am coming up blank. I'm not a big jewelry person, though a mother's necklace sounds OK. What have you done or will you do? What do you think of this tradition?

[BabyBearsMom]

DH offered it to me but all I wanted was sushi lol

[SnuggleBuggles]

Never heard about it till this board a few years ago. Didn't expect anything. I would have liked flowers or something but no need for a fancy gift.

[mommylamb]

DH got me small, inexpensive Jewelry gifts both times. It was a nice gesture.

[Philly Mom]

Not me, but friends of mine have. I joked with DH that I wanted an extra day of a housekeeper for a push present (still kind of do). He ignored me :). If I was to get anything, I like the necklaces that have charms with the kids names on it. The charms look like circles with the names engraved. Probably not good at describing it.

[123LuckyMom]

I certainly have heard of the tradition, and I think it's lovely! I very much like the idea of a spouse giving the mother of his or her children a gift to commemorate the day their child was born. We didn't do this. I'm also not a big jewelry person, and any jewelry I would want, I wouldn't have wanted DH to buy then. I would rather have that money to splurge on stuff for the baby. My taste is very expensive!

I don't like the term "push present", though, because it implies the woman is being rewarded for birthing rather than that the gift is to commemorate the birth. I think this kind of gift should be a lasting one, like jewelry one would pass down, and not just an extravagant one like a Birkin bag or (on a lower budget) a tablet or something. If I had wanted to spend the money, I would have asked for a gold watch. I saw one at Tiffany's I love, and my mom has a beautiful Cartier one. I just didn't feel the need.

[pinay]

I jokingly talked about it when pregnant with DD2, since we knew she would be our last. DH took me seriously though so we ended up deciding to get me a ring with the girls' birthstones that I could stack with my engagement and wedding rings.

[scrooks]

I joked with my DH that after my 3rd csection I deserved a push present. He bought me an iPad to use in the hospital :jammin:

[marymoo86]

We haven't specifically talked about it but I got a watch with a pink face for DD with her name/bd engraved. I wish there was room to add surprise DD2 on there. I would like something to commemorate her as well with her name engraved but do not care what.

[bisous]

I've never had one. I'd like it, but don't want to pay for it, lol. Not really in the budget!

[shawnandangel]

Lol I can't even get my DH to give me a back rub, I would never expect a gift because I would be setting myself up for disappointment.

[bostonsmama]

DH balked when I brought it up the first time, so to remove any disappointment from him turning me down a second time, I'm not asking. It seems to be more common among my girlfriends who have spendier tastes (and husbands with fabulous incomes).

Jewelry (the kind I like) is such an extravagant purchase these days, that it really seems silly to wear something around my neck that costs more than a used car. I would love an initial pendant w/ DD and DS's first letters of their names, but it'll be something we'll have to work into the budget, and it'll likely come out of what I would be getting for Christmas. I'm a clothing junkie, so I'd love a giftcard to a fabulous store to restock my postpartum wardrobe. Ahhh, a girl can dream, right?

[scriptkitten]

i thought the gluttony of stuff i got at my baby shower was my present.

[megs4413]

DH balked when I brought it up the first time, so to remove any disappointment from him turning me down a second time, I'm not asking. It seems to be more common among my girlfriends who have spendier tastes (and husbands with fabulous incomes).

Jewelry (the kind I like) is such an extravagant purchase these days, that it really seems silly to wear something around my neck that costs more than a used car. I would love an initial pendant w/ DD and DS's first letters of their names, but it'll be something we'll have to work into the budget, and it'll likely come out of what I would be getting for Christmas. I'm a clothing junkie, so I'd love a giftcard to a fabulous store to restock my postpartum wardrobe. Ahhh, a girl can dream, right?

I think this is why he feels safe to suggest it...I really don't have spendy taste. I mean, i am a bargain shopper through and through when it comes to stuff for me. the only jewelry I own is my wedding set and besides my iphone/tablet/laptop is the only thing I own that cost over $200. He on the other hand...

I thought i had settled on an expensive diaper bag (which i was originally planning to get used!) but he said i can have it, but it doesn't count as my gift because it's for the baby. so...back to the drawing board! I am thrilled he's trying to do something for me this time. he was an absolute jerk the first time I was pregnant (i mean, horrible, you can't imagine) and was so busy working in my pregnancy with DS that he didn't even come to an appointment until i went in to deliver. my doctor had noted that i was a single mom in my chart because he'd never met or seem him. it was very embarrassing explaining who he was at the induction. :-/ DH's exact words to me, "I'm trying to do it right this time." I think it's sweet of him. :)

[AnnieW625]

I didn't officially get them either time I was pregnant, however with DD1 we had never heard the term until around 2008 or 2009 so DH just joked that I got my Honda Pilot (my first new car) as my present. With DD2 we did send DD1 to daycare full time the entire time I was on maternity leave so that was valued at $2700 so that was a pretty pricey present, but with DD2 being a pretty horrible sleeper during the day it was absolutely worth the cost to not have DD1 trying to wreek havoc with me as well all day long.

[hellokitty]

This sounds very odd, but my mil gave me what would probably be considered a, "push present" after I had DS3, she got me a necklace and pendant. It was nice of her, but I kind of felt weird about it. Let's just say that had DS3 been a girl, I don't think my mil would have given me that necklace (yes, she is one of those old asian immigrant's that I referred to in the other thread and LOVES to be seen with my 3 boys and getting attn that her son has 3 sons). DH never got me a push present, but I did get an extra nice present (tiffany bracelet) for Valentine's day (a few days after DS1 was born).

[cckwmh]

With DD, Dh surprised me with a loose stone that I could have made into anything I wanted. The catch was that whatever it was would be eventually be given to DD when I thought she was ready. He did ask that when it is given to her he didn't want it to be for a special occasion (wedding, graduation, etc).just to give it to when I felt The time is right. It took about four years to save up to do with it what I wanted to do. And now I have a gorgeous Art Deco style right hand ring that will eventually be DD. DD calls it my family ring. Now that I'm finally the expecting DD2, DH did mention the other day that he will have to do something similar for her too.

[citymama]

Never heard about it till this board a few years ago. Didn't expect anything. I would have liked flowers or something but no need for a fancy gift.

Ditto. Never heard of it and the name itself turns me off - seems more like a reward for producing an heir/offspring than a celebration of the mama! If I were in your shoes I would probably ask for an ipad! Great for all those hours spent nursing or rocking on the glider...

[wendibird22]

I've heard about it but never received one. DH brought me flowers after each delivery.

[erosenst]

Think some may be regional/cultural. It wasn't called that, but my dad bought my mom jewelry when my brother and I were born in the early 60s (!). DH bought me a stone which is now set in a mother's necklace when DD9 was born.

Fwiw, we are Jewish, and it appears to be the norm among our Jewish friends, and increasingly common among non Jewish.

Sent from my phone. Please excuse typing errors I've made, and auto correct 'fixes' I missed.

[stinkyfeet]

I didn't get a gift for any of my pregnancies, and I'm ok with that. DH will get me anything that I ask for, but I don't ask for much.

[abh5e8]

i've never gotten a gift from dh....but my ILs have given me nice jewelry with each baby.

[essnce629]

I think it's lame! I think it goes in the same category as giving presents and tipping for every little thing.

My "push presents" were my babies!!!

[gymnbomb]

Think some may be regional/cultural. It wasn't called that, but my dad bought my mom jewelry when my brother and I were born in the early 60s (!). DH bought me a stone which is now set in a mother's necklace when DD9 was born.

Fwiw, we are Jewish, and it appears to be the norm among our Jewish friends, and increasingly common among non Jewish.

Sent from my phone. Please excuse typing errors I've made, and auto correct 'fixes' I missed.



I do not expect a gift from my DH because we're not really the type to get each other presents -- we prefer to use the $ for vacations and such. However, your post reminded me that my Dad gave my Mom a nice pearl necklace when I was born (in the south in the early 80's). They divorced when I was in elementary school, but she held on to it and gave it to me a few years ago. I haven't worn it, mostly because I haven't had the occasion to, but I do love it and will always keep it.

[spannaz]

I think it's a great thing. I'd love a keepsake for having a child with my husband. My mom got gifts from my dad for each me and my sister, and my mom has already passed along to me the earrings she got when I was born. I intend to pass along whatever my husband gives me to my daughter.


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