Dual car families - sharing vehicles

[belovedgandp]

DH and I both have our vehicles that we drive most of the time. Our family of 5 fits in both; if we go out as a whole unit DH tends to drive more, so we take his car. Sometimes we need the bigger vehicle or need to swap for service calls, number of people, whatever.

I've encountered two different situations in the past month where one spouse truly does not drive the other's vehicle. In one case it caused some major juggling when her vehicle had issues.

So do you share or only drive your own?

[o_mom]

We share. I can't imagine not. We take my van if we are all going, but it is 50/50 who drives then.

[SnuggleBuggles]

We take our own cars during the week. On weekends, we drive each car equally. I always make dh drive when we are out together. :). We do occasionally switch cars but don't need to often. We aren't territorial about our cars; they just each meet our individual needs so we stick w our usual car.

[marymoo86]

DH's vehicle is a truck so I only drive if absolutely necessary. He will drive my SUV if he wants but generally I drive it.

[jennilynn]

I voted totally interchangeable, but that's new to us as of this summer. When we had two kids, we each had our own cars. But we bought a minivan while expecting DD1, and it's the only vehicle that fits all three kiddos (the other car is a Civic.) In fact, the Civic is set up to transport either of the boys and the baby, so if we're taking/picking up both boys, we have to take the van too. But we each take the Civic to work. It's a bit of a hassle since DH is 6'5" and I'm 5'4", so we have to adjust everything each time we switch!

[lizzywednesday]

Except in VERY rare circumstances, we each drive our own cars. When I have car issues, I have the option of telecommuting, so it only affects daycare drop-off/pick-up for DD.

DH really can't drive my car - he barely fits in it! - and I am just not comfortable at all in his because I have trouble re-adjusting the seat & steering wheel. (And DH hates it when I drive his car because I never manage to get the seat & steering wheel into the right position ... or I simply forget to put things right when swapping back.)

[new_mommy25]

We share. I have a CR-V and DH has a Mazda 3. DH has a long commute so he got a small car but sometimes we switch for whatever reason. On the weekends or date night we tend to take DH's because the gas mileage is better. If we are going to the beach, bringing an extra person or anywhere we need more space we take my car. DH tends to drive more just because I prefer to be passenger but we both drive. We went to a concert the other night and I drove his car home because I was the designated driver. :) I think it would be limiting to not be able to share back and forth. However if DH had something like a huge truck I might feel uncomfortable driving his vehicle.

[codex57]

DW grew up in the City where you really didn't have cars. So, she adopted my family's SoCal car-centric habits. We happen to treat cars interchangeably (it's not a SoCal thing, just what my family happens to do). I mean, I guess we have cars assigned to each person, but it's pretty nominal. When we're together for example, my dad will drive my mom's minivan (unless I'm there too in which case I end up as the driver). Like a lot of families where I grew up, we had a spare car. So, we just took the car that suited our trip's need. Right now, I actually drive the minivan while DW takes the Lexus cuz the minivan is newer so we want the Lexus to go to DW's sketchier parking lot. Come to think of it, I think DW actually took the spare Camry today so she might have a meeting downtown where it's super sketchy.

[elliput]

DH usually takes the same vehicle unless I need it specifically or he needs the other specifically. If I have both to choose from, and don't need the cargo space of the bigger vehicle, I take the one with the better mileage.

[BabbyO]

I think right now DH technically drives "my" car and I drive "his.' When we got the new family car (DH's Outback) rather than switching the plates 2x, we just put my plates on the Outback. But he drives it 95% of the time. I drive it when he's out of town, when he needs service (I work closer to the mechanic), or other specific instances. It is the car we use on trips/family outings most often, but he usually drives.

My car is an older forester and I drive it most of the time. The other reason I drive this car most of the time it that it is the older car and we don't want to be racking up miles on the new car. I drive 75 mi/day and if I drove the new car we would need to replace them both about the same time!

[infocrazy]

Well, our family of 6 only fits in the van, so that makes the decision easy. In general though, I drive the van and DH the truck (only seats for X, DD, and 1 booster). If we are all together, DH mostly drives...because I cannot take his commentary, get over here, watch out for that car, why did you switch lanes?

I do not like the truck. I feel like it turns like one of those horrible car grocery carts. Hate it. I only drive it when necessary.

[hellokitty]

Ideally, we'd like to get a fuel efficient care that can fit out entire family, and whoever I'd driving more that day takes that car. Right Noe dh has a Subaru wrx. It's stick shift. I don't drive std shift. I know I can learn, but he is such a nervous nelly when trying to teach me, I got fed up with him and told him to forget it. Ftr, i havr a better driving record than he does. However, he's so obsessed abiut his stupid car. He thinks I'm being unreasonable and wants to hire someone to teach me how yo drive std shift. I'm annoyed with him about this whole thing. Esp, since I never wanted him to get such an impractical car to begin with. We looked at new cars this past yr and basically he just wants another impractical car. So I told him to forget it.

Sent from my SPH-L720 using Tapatalk 4

[lhafer]

I drive a minivan, DH drive a Hyundai Genesis Sports Coupe. On the weekends when we go somewhere as a family - we take my car, and I drive. We never go anywhere in his car as a family. Occasionally if we meet somewhere, DD1 will ride home with him in his car, only because she's in a booster.

I lease my minivan, so if we are all home, and I need to run to the store - I will take DH's car so I don't put miles on mine. Otherwise, we stick to our own cars.

[AnnieW625]

It is totally interchangeable in our family and pretty much always has been. DH's car is my old Honda Pilot now because even though we were replacing DH's car this past January there was really no car on the market that DH really other liked or wanted (he likes the Ford Flex, Jeep Grand Cherokee diesel, Chevy Tahoe/GMC Denali, but really wants a small to mid size 4 door pick up so we agreed that the next car will be one of those cars) that got as good a gas mileage as our Passat TDI. He would have loved a used Audi A4, Mercedes C300, or a BMW 3 or 5, but the mileage for commuting wasn't all that great. DH actually gets better mileage in my Pilot than I did. I have a more stop n go commute so it made more sense for me to take the sedan, plus I really like driving a sedan more than an SUV. I will take the SUV though if I know I am going to be taking one of DD1's friends home from school or what not because it is easier to put a LBB in the middle than in the back of our Passat (I think I need a Bubble Bum for that, but it hasn't been an issue so far).

For long trips we take our Pilot because it is more confortable and we have more space for stuff if we need to store stuff. For most other trips though we do take our Passat because because our Pilot already has 130K miles and we would like it to last another 5 to 7 yrs. (225K-250K miles is our goal), and in an ideal world it will become DD1's first car because by then it will be 16 yrs. old and hella cheep to insure.

[KrisM]

We share, more or less.

During the week, we drive our own.

DH's car is tough to get 3 in, so if one of is going with all the kids, the minivan goes. If I'm running errands alone, I drive DH's car. If I'm taking 1 big kid to a practice, I drive DH's car. I tend to take DS2 in my van only because I keep the soccer stuff in there, so it's easier.

[smilequeen]

I drive mine during the week and he drives his. Now that his comfortably fits all of us, we take his on weekends except to hockey. Mine racks up a lot of miles during the week and I like to give it a rest but I do prefer to drive mine. We have zero issues sharing but I think we both like the feel of driving our regular car.

[khalloc]

We each have our own. Sometimes I will drive DH's car and thats usually because he is away on a business trip. He has a Prius and gets much better gas mileage than I do. So if I can I drive his. But he gets pissy about it sometimes and will make snide comments about me driving his car. So I am trying not to do it. I wouldnt think twice if he wanted to drive my car since it is AWD (subaru) though.

[abh5e8]

we share completely. we actually have a "work car" that we both take to work (he works nights, i work days) and a "kid car" that whoever has the kids uses. but, we have 4dc and the work car only has seats. we are very used to sharing. when we got married we only had 1 car for quite a while, even after dd was born. if we are all 6 going somewhere dh drives. i just don't like driving that much.

[newnana]

He thinks I'm being unreasonable and wants to hire someone to teach me how yo drive std shift.



Well, I had always driven a stick until buying cars as a married person. I now drive an automatic so we can swap cars if needed. My DH can't drive a stick, so it wouldn't be practical for us. Plus, teaching water skiing and how to drive a manual are the 2 relationship killers I would never embark upon when dating, no way am I risking my marriage for it. I couldn't agree with you more, that's a job for someone less emotionally involved than a spouse and not worth risking if he is too attached to his car. You will grind the gears or wear down the clutch or something to up the ante. no thanks. and I love cars.

[carolinacool]

Up until last year, DH had always had a standard, so I literally could not drive it. LOL Until 2010, we always took his car, though, for long trips because it was more comfortable and generally in better condition that whatever I had at the time. I got my Murano in 2010, and that became our go-to vehicle for travel and for tooling around town on the weekends. Occasionally, we'll take his Altima. He's had the Altima for about a year and a half, and I can count on both hands the number of times I've driven it solo. I just prefer mine unless he needs to take it in for maintenance or something.

ETA: I see stick shifts have come between other couples. LOL DH tried to teach back when he got his brand-new Maxima in 2000. After I scraped the gears a couple of times, I decided we were done. He got really red and I though he head was going to pop right off of his body :rotflmao: At the time, I think we had been dating two years.

[nfowife]

We have a sedan and a minivan. We only have seats for all the kids in the van, so when we go out as a family we take the van. If DH goes somewhere with 0-2 kids, he takes his car. If I go somewhere alone and DH might want/need to take the kids someplace, then I take his car. Both are automatic. DH used to (before kids) drive a stick and I can't drive stick so then I didn't drive his car at all. Now it's more a case of logistics than anything else. We can fit all 3 kids in his car, but it requires a bit of squishing and using the bubblebum booster which DD doesn't really like so I only do that if my car is in the shop or whatnot.

[MontrealMum]

During the week we each have our "own" car that we drive, though technically "DH's car" is mine...I'm not sure he's even on the title. He started driving that car a few years back when we bought our Subie because of the gas mileage. He drives so much more than I do that it made sense that he use the car that's cheaper on gas. Theoretically, though, both cars are interchangeable both in terms of setup (what's in them) and insurance, and we do switch as needed.

[daniele_ut]

I drive a minivan and dh drives a Subaru Outback XT wagon. He drives our oldest DS and 2 other kids to school every morning so there are rarely car seats in dh's car for our younger 2. We take the van if we are all going somewhere as a family and sometimes I drive, sometimes dh. If dh needs the van for some reason I make the seat swap and he takes it. His car is a standard transmission but I have no problems driving it as I drove a standard transmission Jetta as my primary car for 10 years. I truly can't imagine owning a vehicle that I couldn't drive.

[Tondi G]

when I drive carpool I need my larger vehicle but otherwise we are totally interchangeable.

[maestramommy]

Because Dh's car is not great on gas mileage, we usually try to stick with my car when possible. He drives his car to work when he needs to drive to work (he usually bikes or runs), to the dump, and when we both have to drive at any given time. If I don't need the car and he does, he drives my car. When we go anywhere as a family it's my car, since that's where the carseats are.

[gymnbomb]

My husband usually drives his, but will drive mine if it's more convenient (like if it's parked behind his). I will drive his if I HAVE to (i.e. one car in the shop, taking turns on long road trip, etc.) but I really don't like driving it. Although it is the same size as my car I never feel like I can get the seat and mirrors adjusted quite right so I just don't feel that comfortable driving it. I feel safe, but I feel like things are in the wrong place and everything would be so much better if I were 6 inches taller!

He also has a company vehicle which I am not allowed to drive for insurance/company policy reasons. When the lease runs out on his other car we will probably try just having his company van that he drives for work and my car that we'll drive for everything else for a while.

[Zukini]

We each drive our own during the week. After work or on weekends, mine (Lexus SUV) is the one driven primarily - whether its one of us or both going out. DH would take the suv to work but its the newer of the two vehicles and he is extra picky about door dings and the like, especially in work parking lots where folks are either in a hurry to get in or get out. Needless to say, I'm the person who parks furthest out at costco or the mall (I will drop off passengers at the door to the store if needed lol).

We each carry fobs to both vehicles on our key rings at all times. It's never an issue, as long as there's a car available for me to drive once he's left for the day I'm good.

[Mommy_Mea]

We fall somewhere in between "to each their own" and "totally interchangeable". The station wagon was "my" choice and "my" car. The recent sedan purchase was "DH's" choice and "DH's" car. But we swap back and forth pretty regularly. The new sedan gets much better gas mileage, so we try and take it on the longer trips if we don't need the cargo room.

[HannaAddict]

We share. We each have a primary car we drive but we can drive either and do if needed. Can't imagine not sharing.

[swissair81]

My husband and I despise each others cars. I drive his car if we're on a trip and sharing the driving or my car is not usable. That's about it. It's a good thing that we need to have two cars, because we would never agree on one. He doesn't like minivans and I don't like oversized SUVs.

[janine]

DH and I both have our vehicles that we drive most of the time. Our family of 5 fits in both; if we go out as a whole unit DH tends to drive more, so we take his car. Sometimes we need the bigger vehicle or need to swap for service calls, number of people, whatever.

I've encountered two different situations in the past month where one spouse truly does not drive the other's vehicle. In one case it caused some major juggling when her vehicle had issues.

So do you share or only drive your own?

I answered 2nd option but in truth I never drive DH's car (but he does mine as needed). My reason is his is a luxury big SUV and I just don't feel comfortable being a relatively new driver. Scared to damage the car and scared I'll be driving some giant boat with no sense of my size. There's no real need for me to use it, it is vehicle of choice in cases like long road trips, vacay, stuffing things from stores and DH is always there for those occassions.

[lalasmama]

We share. I drive whatever vehicle's keys are easiest to find :) DH, for some odd reason, thinks I'm safer driving his vehicle (Ford Explorer) than mine (Buick LaCross), so I take his in any inclement weather. We joke that my wedding present was a new car--his! :)

[Pyrodjm]

I drive an Ody, DH a civic coupe. If we go out as a family, 95% of the time DH drives and we take the van. he's a better driver and I don't really like driving much. He uses his car for commuting to work and I use it when I'm going out and leaving him with the girls. It's just so much easier driving the in the Ody, though we all fit in the civic. When going out alone DH drives his car, same when we go out without the kids. We definitely prefer to drive our own but switch often and use whichever both to transport kids.

[theriviera]

I drive a minivan, DH drive a Hyundai Genesis Sports Coupe. On the weekends when we go somewhere as a family - we take my car, and I drive. We never go anywhere in his car as a family. Occasionally if we meet somewhere, DD1 will ride home with him in his car, only because she's in a booster.

I lease my minivan, so if we are all home, and I need to run to the store - I will take DH's car so I don't put miles on mine. Otherwise, we stick to our own cars.

We have different cars but this is us too. Dh doesn't even have car seats in his car.

[DualvansMommy]

When i was working with a 30 mile commute one way, we used to drive our cars as our own exclusively. But since buying the Outback and SAHM, he drives the older camry for his commute and i drive the outback since it fits my needs better to lug DS, stroller, etc. However, DH's office is only 10 mins away and telecommutes from home 2x a week, so he pretty much drives my Outback often. I only drive the camry if i'm toting my Boxers to the vet, dog parks, or to the car shop.

[niccig]

During the week, we mostly drive our own cars. Weekends it just depends which car is needed. Dh will often drive on weekends as I have a shocking sense of direction and he knows the city better than I do.

[Snow mom]

Typically if we're on our own we each drive our own car. If we are going somewhere together we take my car and either one of us will drive it.

[ellies mom]

My husband has a two door Honda Civic and I have a Subaru Outback. When we go someplace as a family, DH drives my car. When we both work, we drive our own cars. Otherwise, the person who has the kids drives my car and the person working drives DH's car because his car is such a pain to get the girls in and out of the back. So generally, I drive my car half the week and DH's car the other half. When we replace these cars, DHs car will probably be the family car but both cars will be family friendly so there will be less swapping.



Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[crayonblue]

We have a minivan and a Camry. The Camry was "mine" but then DH inherited it when we got the van. He is still not happy about that! However, the Camry may have died this week...it came to a halt at an intersection, smoke and all and had to be towed to the shop. We shall see. If it is indeed dead, DH will be getting a Jeep Wrangler.

All that to say that we have car seats in both cars so that we can both drive whichever car and take the kids along. But, DH mostly drives the Camry and I mostly drive the van.

[mommyp]

Totally interchangeable!

[klwa]

I voted bicycle because, while DH & I will generally only drive our own car if we're going seperately, if we're going as a family unit, DH drives my car because it's the only one we have that comfortably seats all 5 of us. If my car needs to go to the shop, I use his car & he drives the truck (which also fits us as a family).

[mommylamb]

DH and I have 2 SUVs, and neither of us really has ownership over either specifically. One is our primary car and the other is our secondary. I drive our primary car most of the time because I commute for work and DH WAH 3 day a week and I drive him into the city with me the other 2 days and he metros home. So the secondary car is home with him on the days he WAH. On the weekends we usually drive the primary car. I'm away on a business trip at the moment so I took the secondary car to the airport so DH could have the primary while I'm gone.

[egoldber]

We definitely have his and hers vehicles. I don't particularly like to drive DH's car, but will on occasion. I have a wagon and sometimes he uses my car to haul taller items. Also he takes it in for service, and I will drive his car then.

[Philly Mom]

We have a primary car that I get to pick what it is and a secondary car that is DH's choice. I drive to and from work so I can drop DD at daycare. DH takes the train to work but often drives home with me. On the weekends, we take the primary car if we go out together. DH takes the other car if he goes out without me. DD is almost always in the primary car. DH likes to keep his car "clean". When I am not pregnant, I do most of the driving when we are together. I have been tired and/or uncomfortable in this pregnancy so DH does more driving. We used to segregate our driving by country. I drive in the US and he drove in the UK, which meant I did almost all the driving. Pregnancy times two changed it a bit.

[zukeypur]

I drive a minivan, DH drive a Hyundai Genesis Sports Coupe. On the weekends when we go somewhere as a family - we take my car, and I drive. We never go anywhere in his car as a family. Occasionally if we meet somewhere, DD1 will ride home with him in his car, only because she's in a booster.

I lease my minivan, so if we are all home, and I need to run to the store - I will take DH's car so I don't put miles on mine. Otherwise, we stick to our own cars.

This exactly, except DH drives a Honda Crosstour.