american_mama
09-19-2013, 01:52 AM
I'd like to hear people's stories and experiences hosting a high school foreign exchange student for a year. Specifically, I am curious about experiences arranging it directly with the foreign family rather than going through an organization, and expenses related to being a host.
The background is this: I have been friends for 25 years with a German man I met when HE was an exchange student in my hometown. I know him well: he and his wife and kids came to my wedding, DH and I have visited them in Germany twice, including once this year and I visited them on my own as well. I am considering offering for his teen daughter to be an exchange student at our house for a year. Their whole family is very internatinoal and is very talented linguistically, which is one reason I thought she might be interested in doing this.
My concerns are mostly about having a teenager in the house. That's just a phase of childhood I don't have a lot of current experience with. She;s also a very, very pretty teen who seemed from our spring visit to be very social and attract a lot of boy attention. I keep thinking that I'd be doing a lot of de facto parenting to this girl, or is that incorrect? Who does things like say aye or nay to social events, nights out, trips, electronics use, appropriate friends, etc. when you have a teen exchange student? Who comforts her if she's crying over loneliness? Would a teen feel odd being in a house with much younger children (mine are 11, 8, and 5 and the 5 year old is totally in love with her and would want to be with her all the time.)
Lastly, cost. How much would adding a teen to my house likely cost? There have been years in the past where we just couldn't have afforded to add another optional person, although I think we're in a much better place now. Who pays for things like big trips, new clohtes, fun purchases, etc? If an exchange student is placed through an organization, does the foreign family pay anything to the host family? If so, can you see the same thing being done in a private arrangement like I am discussing, or is that just too awkward?
DH is probably on board; I suggested this idea once to him and he said he'd been thinking the same thing. I just want some real life background.
The background is this: I have been friends for 25 years with a German man I met when HE was an exchange student in my hometown. I know him well: he and his wife and kids came to my wedding, DH and I have visited them in Germany twice, including once this year and I visited them on my own as well. I am considering offering for his teen daughter to be an exchange student at our house for a year. Their whole family is very internatinoal and is very talented linguistically, which is one reason I thought she might be interested in doing this.
My concerns are mostly about having a teenager in the house. That's just a phase of childhood I don't have a lot of current experience with. She;s also a very, very pretty teen who seemed from our spring visit to be very social and attract a lot of boy attention. I keep thinking that I'd be doing a lot of de facto parenting to this girl, or is that incorrect? Who does things like say aye or nay to social events, nights out, trips, electronics use, appropriate friends, etc. when you have a teen exchange student? Who comforts her if she's crying over loneliness? Would a teen feel odd being in a house with much younger children (mine are 11, 8, and 5 and the 5 year old is totally in love with her and would want to be with her all the time.)
Lastly, cost. How much would adding a teen to my house likely cost? There have been years in the past where we just couldn't have afforded to add another optional person, although I think we're in a much better place now. Who pays for things like big trips, new clohtes, fun purchases, etc? If an exchange student is placed through an organization, does the foreign family pay anything to the host family? If so, can you see the same thing being done in a private arrangement like I am discussing, or is that just too awkward?
DH is probably on board; I suggested this idea once to him and he said he'd been thinking the same thing. I just want some real life background.