Obnoxious Group Gifts Rules?

[bisous]

DH has a big extended family. With his siblings and their respective families we usually do a gift exchange. On even years just the cousins exchange gifts. It is super cute and I LOVE even years! On odd years you buy for the whole family. Which I find really difficult. Even worse, this year the gift giving LIMIT is $25. We have a family of 6!! What can I buy for $25 for a family of six? I like to buy presents. Would I be a horrible person for secretly spending way more than that?? FWIW, the family we are "gifting" lives in another state. All the other families live locally so we might be able to be discreet. Or would that be rude?

TIA!

Jen

[SnuggleBuggles]

Board games, movies, pass for mini golf or movie theater, baking set (brownie pan, potholder, cookbook, bag of chocolate), hot cocoa and mugs (you can find cheap mugs around), popcorn set (big bowl, fancy popcorn and/ or seasonings)...I can think of lots of stuff. :) I think it's ok to spend a little more but it might make them feel bad for not spending more.

[Still-in-Shock]

If you find a coupon and buy something that's worth more than $25, will you be breaking the rules? And I was going to suggest a board game too.
My ILs with a 11 yo and an 8 yo like Labyrinth
http://www.amazon.com/Ravensburger-26448-Labyrinth/dp/B00000J0JF
and my 17 yo nephew likes the triangle version of Blokus
http://www.amazon.com/Mattel-R1985-Blokus-Trigon-Game/dp/B001P06GXY/

[specialp]

If I found the perfect gift and it was $30, I would spend that but I would not spend "way more" than the limit. I have been on the receiving end and it is very aggravating, makes others feel bad or like they have to make sure and spend more on you, and eventually the limit doesn't exist, etc. It's okay to suggest a higher limit for everyone to agree to, but I would stick to what it is for this year and look at it as a fun challenge. We finally ditched the gift exchange because of one family member who would always go well above the limit. I think a game set or board game is a great idea!

[carolinacool]

I don't know if its rude, but I think if that's the limit that was set, you should try to follow it. I assume that your own family will be receiving a $25 gift. If it's fine with you, it should be fine with the family you are buying for. It would be one thing if you had a very specific idea in mind that you just can't let go of, but it sounds like you just want to buy lots of presents.

Maybe you can revisit for 2015 and suggest raising the limit.

[bisous]

I don't know if its rude, but I think if that's the limit that was set, you should try to follow it. I assume that your own family will be receiving a $25 gift. If it's fine with you, it should be fine with the family you are buying for. It would be one thing if you had a very specific idea in mind that you just can't let go of, but it sounds like you just want to buy lots of presents.

Maybe you can revisit for 2015 and suggest raising the limit.

Thank you for this perspective. I would be perfectly fine with receiving a $25 gift. I'll try to find something special for $25. I like the idea of a board game but that's pretty much what we do every year. It is kind of a joke now because about 4 years ago we had a conversation about how to do this. Me and one other SIL were arguing for cousin presents every year. The other two family members were arguing for FAMILIES every year. We compromised on switching off. My SIL mentioned that part of why she liked doing cousin presents was because "not everyone in a family might like playing board games" so now I'm wary to buy them, lol!

The only bummer about the low limit is that it makes shopping much more difficult. In a rare year where I happen to have more money than time or inclination, I rather resent being given such a low limit! But it is what it is. If this is the worst Christmas time family gripe, it will be a good year, lol.

Thanks for weighing in!

[Mermanaid]

That's hard. Since they are out of state you have to ship everything? Can you do something homemade? Last year I took photos of our cousins and transferred them to wood then sealed them. They loved it and it was very easy and defiantly under $25.

This year I am going to paint terra cotta pots a solid color the paint on the house address or last name for my family. Of course that may be hard to ship.

If the family likes food you could find a small gourmet basket to send them. Or maybe a Harry and David basket they could munch on for Christmas Eve or day.

Oh how about $25 worth of lottery tickets? They could have a lot to scratch if you sent scratch offs.

[azzeps]

How about a "movie night" themed basket? A couple of DVDs, some popcorn, candy or other treats, wrapped up festively?

I like the idea of making them something... do you have any special talents or craftiness? I think those are always nice gifts to give and receive, if you have the time to do it. I'm into photography, so I give framed pictures often.

[carolinacool]

How about a "movie night" themed basket? A couple of DVDs, some popcorn, candy or other treats, wrapped up festively?.

I think this is a great idea! Bisous, I have to admit, I'm with your sister-in-law on the board games. DH and I Are not into them at all, although that could change when DS is older. If they do seem to be a common present, I think the movie night idea is a nice alternative.

[rin]

We buy for several whole families in each of our extended families, and while we don't have a strict limit we usually do around $25-$40 for each family.

Things we've done in the past:

Movie night (a DVD, some fancy popcorn, maybe some fancy hot cocoa mix)
Harry & David fruit (always on sale, this one usually ends up being around $20.)
Steak deal from Omaha Steaks.
Magazine subscription (we've done National Geographic, Cricket, and Zoobooks)
A holiday wreath (if the family will open it before Christmas)

HTH! I'll be watching this thread for ideas for this year.

[candaceb]

What about a box of pears from Harry & David?
Fancy cinnamon rolls delivered for Christmas morning?
3 months of netflix?

[123LuckyMom]

You've gotten some good ideas! I, too, would honor the $25 limit as closely as possible (shipping and wrapping costs don't count!)

I like Christmas crackers with the silver charms. I think Williams Sonoma sells them

How about a gift certificate to a local bakery?

[minnie-zb]

I saw this on Pinterest and thought it was cute (don't know if you sew):

http://zitzmanfam.blogspot.com/2012/07/movie-theme-birthday-present-girl.html -- you could tailor for a theme, doesn't have to be girly

How about a nice ornament for the family?

[BunnyBee]

This malted pancake and waffle mix is supposedly the same as W-S:
http://www.amazon.com/Golden-Malted-Natural-33-Ounce-Containers/dp/B001EO6BFE/
You could buy a 3 pack and repackage it in a pretty container (these style jars are always at HomeGoods, Marshalls, etc.):
http://www.amazon.com/Anchor-Hocking-3-Piece-Cracker-Canister/dp/B00BWB8S14/
Real maple syrup from TJs or a bottle from HomeGoods

Or maybe pancake molds? If they're Star Wars fans (and really, if they're not, why are you acknowledging the relation? ;) ), these are cheap:
http://www.williams-sonoma.com/products/star-wars-pancake-mold/?pkey=cpancake-molds&cm_src=pancake-molds||NoFacet-_-NoFacet-_--_-

You could get a pack of flour sack towels and let your kids decorate one for each of the families with fabric markers. :)

I'd do the same gift to all the families, throw them in flat rate boxes, run some construction paper and extra holiday catalogs through the shredder for packing material, print the labels from home, and you're done!