Who should share? Shared room WWYD

[bisous]

We live in a small house. We love it, but it is small. There is no possibility that we will be moving to a larger house any time soon.

It has three bedrooms and there are four children.

Here's how it breaks down:

DS1 10 yo has type 1 diabetes and needs his blood sugar to be tested at night. He is currently sharing with...

DS2 6 yo and an awesome sleeper. Both big boys share happily, play together all the time, go to bed and get up at the same time

DS3 is 2.5 and currently has his own room. He has sensory issues. He's super, super hard and sleeps with a white noise machine. He gets into all the big boys things. He breaks their creations and their special things and climbs the bunk beds in the boys room.

DD is 5 mo. I usually put my babies in the room with siblings at 6 mo. But this is one is actually super EASY and mellow, meaning she could probably go anywhere or even stay in my room!

Here's the quandary: DH wants to put DS3 in with the two bigger boys. We have a bed for him (trundle on the bunk bed) and I've always loved the idea of having my kids bunk together. That said, there are NUMEROUS reasons why this would not be fun. I'm sure we would disturb DS3's sleep when we test DS1's blood sugar. I don't think DS3 is ready to get out of a crib. The boys room is in a louder area (his current bedroom is more private) and frankly, I don't think one tiny baby (DD) needs to take up so much space when our house is so small!

So WWYD? Would you

a. Put all three boys together and DD in her own room?

b. Have DS3 and DD share for a time?

c. Keep things as is (DD in our bedroom, DS3 with his own room)

or maybe even

d. Move all three boys to quieter bedroom?

All my family and friends have different opinions. I'd LOVE to hear the BBB opinion!

[pharmjenn]

We live in a small house. We love it, but it is small. There is no possibility that we will be moving to a larger house any time soon.

It has three bedrooms and there are four children.

Here's how it breaks down:

DS1 10 yo has type 1 diabetes and needs his blood sugar to be tested at night. He is currently sharing with...

DS2 6 yo and an awesome sleeper. Both big boys share happily, play together all the time, go to bed and get up at the same time

DS3 is 2.5 and currently has his own room. He has sensory issues. He's super, super hard and sleeps with a white noise machine. He gets into all the big boys things. He breaks their creations and their special things and climbs the bunk beds in the boys room.

DD is 5 mo. I usually put my babies in the room with siblings at 6 mo. But this is one is actually super EASY and mellow, meaning she could probably go anywhere or even stay in my room!

Here's the quandary: DH wants to put DS3 in with the two bigger boys. We have a bed for him (trundle on the bunk bed) and I've always loved the idea of having my kids bunk together. That said, there are NUMEROUS reasons why this would not be fun. I'm sure we would disturb DS3's sleep when we test DS1's blood sugar. I don't think DS3 is ready to get out of a crib. The boys room is in a louder area (his current bedroom is more private) and frankly, I don't think one tiny baby (DD) needs to take up so much space when our house is so small!

So WWYD? Would you

a. Put all three boys together and DD in her own room?

b. Have DS3 and DD share for a time?

c. Keep things as is (DD in our bedroom, DS3 with his own room)

or maybe even

d. Move all three boys to quieter bedroom?

All my family and friends have different opinions. I'd LOVE to hear the BBB opinion!

I would not put DS3 into the room with the other boys. You listed numerous reasons why this wouldn't work out well for any of them.
I don't see any reason why DS3 and DD couldn't share a room for the next few years or longer, if his room is large enough for 2 cribs then 2 beds.
If she is doing well in your room, and it isn't interupting your life with your DH, then maybe leave things as is for now, and review options at a later date.

[ckso]

Given the circumstances, if it were my, I would opt for C: keep things as is. Even though your DD sleeps really well, she's still a young infant which means she will still go through various stages of sleep regression so putting her with DS3 may be too disruptive for him especially since you say he's the hard one. For that same reason, I wouldn't put all the boys together either. Especially if he's getting into his big brother stuff.

I think 2.5 is that explosive age where they're learning and changing so fast. They get into things they shouldn't and although starting to understand when you tell them "no", they forget pretty quickly. When they are 3-4, that's when they mature quite a bit and are less likely to be destructive/disruptive and maybe even sleep better.

Since your DD can sleep anywhere and you don't mind her continue to sleep with your bedroom, then I would do that so it'll allow DS3 to mature a little more. Then you can gauge whether it's better for him to move in with the older boys or share with DD

[bisous]

That makes a lot of sense! I think I've over-thought this whole process. I'm itching for them to get where they are supposed to be permanently but I think DS3 still has lots of growth and maturity to go through and it is just tough to say how he will be in another year or even another 6 months!

Thanks for weighing in. :)

[hillview]

I'd let it be for a while if having DD in your room isn't a burden for you guys for alone time :)

I'd also consider moving DD into the room with the big boys ... sounds like DS3 really needs his own space.

[AshleyAnn]

I'd go with C until that no longer was working for DD and then reevaluate. I'm not sure what my next step would be - I wouldn't expect a teenager to share a room with him much younger siblings so probably option B.

[123LuckyMom]

I agree with maintaining the status quo. It's working now, so don't worry about changing it until it's no longer working. Reevaluate when you're no longer happy with DD in your space. By then, DS3 might be ready to join his brothers or bunk with DD.

[KpbS]

I would move DD in with DS3. Her easy personality can adapt to his white noise needs and it seems like they might both enjoy the togetherness and become pals. Him dropping his nap, while a challenge to the daily routine of late afternoon and dinner (BTDT!!) would be fine for her having her own space to nap and they would most likely both need early bedtimes, her being a baby and him being exhausted so you could out them down at the same early time and focus on the big boys.

I'm sorry about the extra hour a day. That is really hard. Is there an end in sight?

Hugs!

[BunnyBee]

Lots of good reasons for not moving DS3 in the big boys' room, so cross that off the list!

I'd keep DD in with you if it's working. Don't mess with the status quo if everyone is sleeping. My littles usually stay with us until at least 3, and we had extra bedrooms.

[lil_acorn]

Another vote for C. If it ain't broke, don't fix it!

[queenmama]

I vote for C also. Maybe DS3 and DD can share in the future, or maybe he'll even be able to bunk with the big boys when he matures a bit, but right now, I think it would be unfair to them.

Lara

[vonfirmath]

I see no problem with having DS3 and DD share a room when you decide to move DD out of your room.