low adaptive score--and I'm sad

[JustMe]

My friend encouraged me to ask dd's developmental ped. if I could do an adaptive checklist on her...there are some new services available there that she could qualify for if she scored low. I really thought dd was doing okay in this area, and didn't think there would be a point. An adaptive checklist had been part of her eval 2-3 years ago and she had done fine. I thought she had made progress since then. OTOH I thought it wouldn't hurt and it would be interesting to see how she scored. Dd is the type of kid who is kind of all over the place in terms of strengths (some very high ones) and challenges. Got a call from the dev. ped. after I sent it back that she scored low--low enough to qualify as developmentally delayed for the new services. I am very happy she will qualify for services finally, but sad that this is where she is. I really didn't expect it as, aside from academics, she has made so much progress in the last year.

[hillview]

hugs. it is hard. both dss have challenges too. permit yourself to grieve a little and to process. HUGS

[JustMe]

Thank you, hillview!

[KpbS]

Hugs to you, JustMe. I hope she can get exactly what she needs in terms of therapy and make some great strides. :hug:

[niccig]

Hugs, I know this is difficult. Hopefully she'll make even bigger leaps with the extra services.

[Pepper]

Echoing the PPs - it is hard to get that news, even if it means DD will get more services. Big hugs.

[Gena]

Hugs. It's hard.

DS tests all over the place - he has scores that run the entire bell curve, 99%ile in some areas and 1%ile in others. The first time we got test scores back in the 1%ile, I was shocked and disheartened. I always knew that somebody's kid had to have the lowest score, I just didn't expect it to me mine. And it was in an area where I thought he was a little behind, but not too bad - I was wrong.

DS has had high-stake tests where we expected him to do poorly because of his language difficulties, and he still scored even lower than we expected. We got over it, but our initial reaction was shock and sadness.

Test scores can be informative, but they just give a snapshot of one moment in time. They don't tell the whole story of your child's development and abilities. So use them to your advantage to get services, but don't let them determine how you (or anyone else) think about your child.

[JustMe]

Thank you for the support and understanding.

Gena, dd too can score very high on some subscores of certain tests, and also has scored in the 1%ile with in the same test...so I know how that feels. On the adaptive eval, she scored low all around.

I hope you are all still reading b/c I can use some input on this. Dd started middle school this fall and today came home to show me she got an F on her Health test. Health is not a core subject, so I am not sure how much her accommodations are being enforced. I looked over the test and felt dd did not understand most of the concepts plus I think there may have been a couple of times when the teacher did not understand her spelling (and they are not supposed to grade spelling, the teacher just didn't know what she was trying to say). This is a kind teacher, and is actually one of dd's favorites. I really don't know what I'm supposed to do--let dd fail, ask the teacher if she is aware of all of dd's accommodations, spend tons of time teaching dd these concepts (which is a problem time-wise, not to mention she has core subjects she needs to spend lots of times, not to mention when I did that type of thing when she is younger it led teachers believe she was fine and should not qualify for special ed).

What I did do was to e-mail dd's case manager/spec ed teacher, tell him the situation, and ask for advice. For those of you who have followed the me for dd vs the school district's saga previously, things are definitely better in this middle school in that I can see her accommodations are being implemented in the core subjects (well except for one very important one in math), that teachers seem to "see" dd both in terms of strengths and challenges, and that the teachers seem to really want to help her even if they don't get what that takes at this point.

[egoldber]

What I did do was to e-mail dd's case manager/spec ed teacher, tell him the situation, and ask for advice.

This is what I have been told to do. I would also have cc'd the health teacher just to let them know that you're in communication with her case manager and have some concerns. Do you get interim reports? Can you see what her grades are overall in all the subjects? I really like the transparency in MS and I feel like I have a much better grasp of where she is having issues vs. not.

And I'm glad that your MS experience has been better. That was ours as well, that the professionals were, well, more professional LOL and that they took her issues much more seriously.

[JustMe]

Thanks, Beth.

Thursdays are the day I get off work early and get to pick dd up, so I went to talk to the case manager/spec ed teacher. We looked over the test together and I showed him dd's notes (which are quite extensive notes that she copies from the board--basically, mostly things she does not understand). He said he was going to talk to the teacher and ask that I get an e-mail home summarizing the main concepts dd is supposed to learn. That should help, I hope.

I am glad I was able to get help..much better than in the past. OTOH, I got the impression that the e-mail I sent last night would not have done anything if I hadn't shown up today (spec ed case mgr made a comment about it being easier and quicker than dealing with e-mail). I get that, but this is so why I only work 35 hrs, wish I could find a way to work less, and am scared my job will insist I work more.