I think my breastfeeding days are coming to an end and I'm not sure how I feel

[TwoBees]

DD2 is nearly 10 months old. I have been pumping since I returned to work when she was 10 weeks. I pumped 3x/day until she was about 6 months and then 2x/day (based on schedule changes and my availability to pump, not necessarily by her need). We're still nursing nights and weekends. My supply has dropped considerably and I am no longer pumping enough for the 3 bottles she takes while at daycare. She gets formula occasionally so I'm not worried about the switch. But I'm not sure how I feel about the end of nursing. I am SO ready to be done with pumping, and I am ready to be done with being the primary food source in the middle of the night, but I think I am going to miss the closeness of nursing. I know there are things I can do to increase my supply but I'm not sure I want to at this point. I feel blessed that I made it this far but disappointed that I may not make it to the 1-year mark. I'm just...confused.

Any BTDT?

[Philly Mom]

I don't think this is the end of nursing if you don't want it to be. I never pumped enough for DD2 so always supplemented with formula once I was back at work. I pumped twice a day until 7 months and then once a day until 10+ months and then I stopped pumping (I had a couple days where my schedule did not permit it so I just stopped because I was DONE with pumping). DD2 is 11.5 months and we are still nursing twice a day during the week and 2 or 3 times a day on the weekends depending on what she wants. She has two small bottles of formula at daycare. I don't think she needs it so I keep them small but I think it helps relax her and her teachers feel better having it. Right now, she is pretty uninterested in nursing during the day even when we are together. I just give her water. She has yogurt every day so I don't worry about it. I know my supply has gone down, I don't feel as full as I used to first thing or at the end of the day, but yesterday she clearly had more than enough in the morning because she nursed for a while and then spit up a bunch of milk a little bit later. I am also sad about the end, which for me will come soon because of work commitments, but we will make it a year.

As an aside, I have a friend who stopped nursing, other than the morning feed, by 7 months, but kept the morning feed until a year. It is totally doable. Sending hugs. I think this transition is hardest on the mommies.

[123LuckyMom]

You may not continue to be her primary food source, but you will still be her primary comfort source and can continue to nurse if you like. It takes a long time for milk to truly dry up, so if you want to nurse once or twice a day for a while, you certainly can. Think of those times as for closeness and not for nutrition. You can stop pumping, too. My daughter is 2, and we nurse at bedtime only. She doesn't need the milk, but she wants to nurse anyway. Frankly, I am past ready to be done, but I'm waiting to wean until after winter, because I think the antibodies in breast milk can help stave off colds and such. She'll be nearly 3 then but will have been nursing only once a day for well over a year.

[sunnyside]

You may not continue to be her primary food source, but you will still be her primary comfort source and can continue to nurse if you like. It takes a long time for milk to truly dry up, so if you want to nurse once or twice a day for a while, you certainly can. Think of those times as for closeness and not for nutrition. You can stop pumping, too. My daughter is 2, and we nurse at bedtime only. She doesn't need the milk, but she wants to nurse anyway. Frankly, I am past ready to be done, but I'm waiting to wean until after winter, because I think the antibodies in breast milk can help stave off colds and such. She'll be nearly 3 then but will have been nursing only once a day for well over a year.

This exactly. My daughter nursed until 3 years 3 months and the last year or so, it was only once a day, sometimes twice. I still had milk.

[ncat]

I stopped pumping at around 11.5 months for both DSs, but continued to nurse at home for several months. I think my supply had dropped quite a bit in the last month or so of pumping and I was ready to be done. You should be able to use formula and as much milk as you want to pump for daycare, and keep the nursing sessions that work for you and your DD.

I am struggling now with when to wean DS2 - I remember being sad when I fully weaned DD and DS1 at about 17 months, but relieved at how much easier my life became. I am going to have a harder time with DS2 - he is my last baby.

[TxCat]

Hugs! I completely get where you are coming from. I stopped pumping as soon as DD2 turned 1 because it was just too exhausting to keep up with, but I still nurse her when I'm home - usually in the morning and at night, and sometimes 1-2x in the middle of the day. Two months after no longer pumping, my supply is down considerably, but DD2 still enjoys the nursing sessions we do have, probably just for the closeness and cuddling. And honestly, in case DD2 is my last, I'm enjoying these remaining nursing sessions too. Anyways, this is a long way of saying that you don't have to stop nursing completely if you and DD2 aren't ready.

[lmh2402]

echoing PPs. I thought for sure our nursing days were over when I went away for a long weekend...last spring! DD is still nursing - usually just once a day, sometimes twice. sometimes not at all for a few days in a row because my schedule just doesn't allow b/c I'm not putting her to bed. But for the most part, I put her in for naps and night time and she always asks to nurse. I have no idea how I still have any milk, but I guess I do. And she just likes to snuggle and relax. It works for us because like TxCat, I'm not having any more kiddos so I'm soaking up this nursing time while it lasts. I think you definitely can continue the nursing relationship in whatever form you want it to be - meaning, you don't have to remain her primary food source in order to still nurse.

[HannaAddict]

I wouldn't view it as the end to nursing. There is still a ton of benefit to any breast milk and tons of benefit to the comfort and closeness nursing can bring. If she is fine with bottles and nursing, I'd continue nursing and just not beat yourself up about supplementing. Hugs.

[TwoBees]

I have spent the weekend reading and processing all of your replies. Thank you so much for the feedback and encouragement. I really am ready to be done with pumping and I think it might be time for me to drop one pumping session each day. DH also gave DD a bottle of powdered formula yesterday (we had previously used RTF single-serve bottles since we weren't using much, and the powder was a different variety of the same brand) and she took it so well that DH joked that I was "fired." It helps me to know that all of you dropped the pumping and/or daytime nursing and were still able to continue with the closeness and nighttime nursing.

[SoCalMommy]

I agree with prior posts. I hated pumping and once I stopped I still BF my DC for closeness but didn't rely on it entirely for nutrition since she was well into solids and I had to also supplement since my supply decreased. I enjoyed it so much more after I stopped pumping! Also agree that the extra antibodies are great during winter/flu season. A definite plus! Hugs mama. You are doing a fabulous job!