What would you say to this mom/friend if anything?

[JustMe]

I have a friend who lives about 5 hours away from me. Every year we get together 1-2 times and meet halfway. I actually met her on-line when we were adopting from the same agency,so her dd is just 2 months older than mine. My dd was really excited about getting together with them last time, but then would not talk to her dd at all. Her dd kept asking mine questions, etc, and many times my dd just ignored her. I talked to my dd about this during the time we spent together and, I think she was overwhelmed, b/c she seemed confused about what I was talking about. I did talk with my friend about this during that day, and she shrugged it off like all kids are different, my dd will be okay, etc...but I feel terrible that my dd treated hers like that. To be honest, I worry they won't be interested in seeing us again. When we got home, my dd talked excitedly about the time we had together, and I told her that she had actually been rude to her friend by not answering her questions, not talking to her. Dd again acted shocked and asked to e-mail her to apologize (by her own accord). Dd did this and we did not hear back (this was several months ago). My friend and I have not corresponded, although that is not necessarily unusual.

I am not sure if I should send an e-mail to my friend and, if so, what to say? My friend is aware dd has a diagnosis, but I don't know if she is connecting it or not. I don't know if I should apologize, just say how bad I feel etc. My dd still identifies this girl as one of her best friends :cry: .WWYD?

thanks!

[BDKmom]

I wouldn't really address it again for now. You and your DD have both given apologies/explanations. I would just initiate some casual contact. Maybe an email or phone call (whatever is the typical mode of communication between you) in a week or so and ask how their holidays went and see how it goes from there. She may be afraid that things will be awkward, or may just be busy. I think just moving forward is the best course at this point.

[Pepper]

I wouldn't really address it again for now. You and your DD have both given apologies/explanations. I would just initiate some casual contact. Maybe an email or phone call (whatever is the typical mode of communication between you) in a week or so and ask how their holidays went and see how it goes from there. She may be afraid that things will be awkward, or may just be busy. I think just moving forward is the best course at this point.

Agreed - since this is really bothering you, it seems like reaching out to say hello is a good way to alleviate your worry.

[Liziz]

Yes, I wouldn't bring it up again directly -- I'd just reach out in friendly conversation to touch base, see how they're doing, etc. I wouldn't put too much stock in the fact you didn't get a reply to the email -- a lot of people I know are just terrible at replying to emails...either they get busy, or they just don't see emails as something that needs a reply -- so it could have just been that, too.