Interesting article...

[Mopey]

This was sent to me this morning. I searched and I don't think anyone has posted it. I did think it was interesting; I am not a big victim of this "busyness" except when it comes to explaining to clients that the kitchen was "so busy" when it takes me a few days to get back to them (always true!). But I am a fan of not overscheduling - so far. I'm sure that will change with two kids, school, etc. but for now I am not a fan and we stay mellow. The person who sent it to me is the busiest, can't sit still person I know and they said it really resonated...

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/scott-dannemiller/busy-is-a-sickness_b_6761264.html

Enjoy some food for thought :)

[AnnieW625]

Thanks. I think the author did a good point of stating that people are just too busy, but in a nice way he needs to chill a bit and realize he probably suffers from busy sickness as well. If you get mad because you and your wife have split up to get things done then that a big issue IMHO.

I work full time outside the home and always have (less a total of 9 months I took off for maternity leave total, with two healthy pregnancie and a second trimester loss) so from a parenting perspective I knew I was going to have a schedule different than about 80% of the moms I knew.... for a higher col my area has a lot of SAHMs or part time working moms, but still more sahm in my experience. So because of that I knew it would be next to impossible to over schedule my toddler(s) and now elementary aged children (Dd2 starts kinder in the fall) so as an example in my family right now year round swim has never been scheduled for either kid because the more affordable options are still at 4 pm M-F. Up until this year my Dd1 only ever did activities (other than summer swim lessons that were nicely scheduled at 5:30) on Saturday mornings, she now has ballet from 6 to 7 on Friday nights. She also has ballet, plus choir on Saturday AM and when basketball was in session (just ended a week ago) she did ballet, and basketball almost back to back (but no chior because that was too much) and Dd2 went to gym class with DH. Sure I missed watching DD2 do gym, but we made it work and we will make Dd2's t ball work too since it is essentially at the same time as Dd1's ballet. We didn't decide to become parents to be complain about being parents all of the time. If we over schedule then that is our own fault and we can't complain. There are some weekend days I have driven 30 miles around my city and I don't feel I have the right to complain about that. If I over scheduled that is 100% my fault.

Socially we do our best to get our kids to birthday parties because we think it is important too even if that means buying a present in between activity A and the start of activity B and then wrapping it quickly after activity B and praying we make it to the party on time because we want our kids to have fun and birthday parties were always fun for myself and DH as kids and we want our kids to have the same experience.

Somehow I fit in gym time on my lunch hour a few days a week (and DH goes after work) and we both have volunteering duties once or twice a month, but these activities are important to us and we want to show our kids that being healthy and volunteering is an important part of life.

(excuse the typos as this was typed on my iPhone from the eliptical machine at the gym)

[rlu]

I've been reading about the minimalistic (or slow living or other phrases) movement with interest. I'm also reading a book Paris Letters where a lady boils down her "baggage" (life) to a few pieces of luggage (and sheds more as she travels) after saving enough to quit her job to travel in Europe for 2 years. I haven't finished but do wonder if she goes a bit crazy with the lack of things to do. At the point I am at in the book she is lounging around Rome, painting, eating, walking, sight-seeing with little schedule or point to each day. I don't know I could do that for more than a few weeks.

I am in the class that gets to create my busyness (rather than those who need to work several jobs to survive and have no choice in their busyness) and I am working to eliminate some of it (DS bridges to Boy Scouts tomorrow which means co-Den Leader drops off my responsibilities after 5 years) but really it is the attitude that helps or hinders in dealing with the stress our chosen busyness creates. The author gets there at the end of his article pointing he no longers feels his life is "busy" but "full".

Elsa (Let It Go) and Taylor (Shake It Off) sing a lot in my head these days.

[Kindra178]

Interesting article. I really think it depends on the kid. My guys want to go to birthday parties, playdates and play two sports a season. I think many of us were just as busy as kids. It definitely taught us how to juggle as adults and be successful in our careers.

[abh5e8]

love the article! Dh and I have made many intentional decisions in our 10 years of marriage/dating, so that our family will not be busy. Sure, with 4 kids, there are still busy days, but I admit, when I hear of the schedules some of ya'll keep, I know I could never keep up. It has been a little tough for both Dh and I, as we grew up in families that highly value and praise performance...of all kids. sports, grades, activities, education, finances and jobs. but letting it all go, is wonderful. we love our little (country) life. its 20 mins to the far side of town, at 8am or 450 pm. we live in the county and its 15 mins to work. kids are in sports and activities, but we home school, so by 3:30 we are all ready to get out a bit. I always encourage people to vision...what do you want your life to look like? and then, how to I make that happen? Realizing you don't "have" to keep up with the Jones is a huge step in that direction.

[Mopey]

I agree we definitely love birthday parties for the social aspect and Mopey loves her friends (we have one or two - including hers! - every weekend for another six weeks) so that doesn't bother me. I do get a little overwhelmed trying to juggle work with full time care-giving but who doesn't?! I still try to always have my own social time - dinner with girlfriends or a quiet hang with my BFF. I can easily see us trying to make sure we have that one day a weekend to lounge or hit the movie theatre when the kids are bigger. And if we have to trade off activities then cool. But another factor for me (with my personality) is the number of kids and another reason I am happy with two. :-) I've always found those people who can't seem to sit still or be mellow/not busy really fascinating. I love the idea of looking at your life as full :D

[div_0305]

I love the idea of looking at your life as full :D
:yeahthat: Since I read the article you posted yesterday, I've been tempted to respond (in the same way as the writer's acquaintance) to the 3 people who already volunteered to me about how "busy" they have been, even "crazy busy." I will consciously try to say life is full from now on, instead of how busy/crazy busy things are. Thanks so much for sharing it with us!