my poor kids

[boltfam]

Today was my kids' grandparent's day at school. My dad passed away a year and a half ago, and grandparent's day brought that loss to the surface. Dd was sad last night b/c she only has one grandpa. My mom decided to leave on her vacation that is a couple hours away last night rather than this morning after grandparent's day. She said she would come if ils were going to be there so that my kids had someone, and while Fil was traveling for business, mil said she would be there. Well, my kids came home and asked why mil never came. Well, she forgot, and when she called, I could hear sil's baby in the background. I'm choosing to believe she really forgot , and I know mistakes happen, but I'm just disappointed for my kids.

[PZMommy]

I'm sorry!

I hate grandparents day and so glad my kid's school does not do this. My parents live across the country, and my DH's grandparents are not involved with our lives (their choice). My kids would have no one able to go.

[123LuckyMom]

I'm sorry, but in this day and age grandparent's day is a stupid, stupid idea. My kids have only one living grandparent, and she lives three hours away most of the year. Even if she were in town, she probably wouldn't attend. All a day like grandparent's day is going to do is make the kids who don't have living, or involved, or local grandparents feel bad. It's a truly terrible idea.

[Gracemom]

Ours was today too and I had to hold back tears. My kids have only one living grandparent who lives 10 hours away. It was especially hard seeing the cute grandpas, because my FIL died this year and I miss my dad terribly. I want to rent my kids a grandpa! Sorry it was a hard day for you too.

[zukeypur]

Ours was a few weeks ago. My mom was actually able to come, for the first time ever. My oldest is 16 and this is the first time anyone has ever come. I join you in my hatred of the Hallmark-created "holiday."

[♥ms.pacman♥]

Ugh, so sorry. I truly don't get it. I'm one of those who hated grandparents' day as a kid (never could participate, my grandparents lived in another country) and i dislike it now too. all 4 gps are alive but live out of town. we had GP day a few weeks ago. i felt bad for DS but luckily it bothered me way more than him and he didn't feel bad AT ALL. i thought about DH or I coming to the lunch instead but we both got caught up in work, and DS didn't even bat an eye or care... thank goodness!!!

i truly wonder why in this day and age they still have this event. do more than, say, 25% of kids actually have a grandparent that is 1) still alive 2) lives in town and 3) would be well enough or be able to take time off work to attend? i wonder if it's a fundraising sort of thing.

[hbridge]

This is one of those things that I never understood... Along with the "father-daughter dance", the "research your heritage" project, the "where did your ancestors come from", "parent shadow the kids day"... Who comes up with these? Not every parent, grandparent, ect. can take time off of work or can be available; not every child knows there heritage, adopted/foster kids may not even know their birth parents race... All these do is show the kids who don't have these things, what they may be missing and adds stress to their lives! The schools need to come up with another plan!!!!

When DC had to research ancestors from another country, we had to go back to the early 1800's to find one! That made "interviewing the relative from that country" really impossible!!!!

[StantonHyde]

At DDs school--it is basically a huge fund raising shake down! They give a really cute performance and then ask for donations! MIL went once. (my mother died when DD was1) I don't think she ever wants to go again and I don't blame her. DD doesn't care because it isn't really a time to hang out with grandparents.

DS's school does a VIP day--you can bring any important person. Thankfully, my kids are able to glom onto other kids' grandparents. DS doesn't seem to mind.

I honestly dislike any event that requires adult participation during school hours--working parents anybody????? What's wrong with the evening?

[gatorsmom]

DD doesn't care because it isn't really a time to hang out with grandparents.

I honestly dislike any event that requires adult participation during school hours--working parents anybody????? What's wrong with the evening?

I just hate these events PERIOD. First, you are so right- there isn't enough time to hang out and enjoy the grandparents anyway. If my dad were alive, all the activity in the room would make him nervous and he couldn't hear what my kids were saying because Of all the background noise. And I KNOW my dad wasn't the only senior hard-of hearing! My kids get about 30 minutes to eat. How much fun can you really have after you gulp down your food??

As for the evening events, I truly despise those. They are a huge disruption of our day. Once we all get home from school and work we can finally unwind, eat and relax while working on homework. But the nights we have to go somewhere after schoolthere is no downtime in the day. When we have to plan an evening activity into the day we spend the evening watching the clock and hurrying to get it all done. We opt out of weeknight activities whenever possible.

[rkold]

When DC had to research ancestors from another country, we had to go back to the early 1800's to find one! That made "interviewing the relative from that country" really impossible!!!!

My great grandparents all came over mostly in the early 1900's so about hundred years after yours, but they're still not available to be interviewed because they're all long dead. This sort of assignment could be really educational but there needs to be some sort of modification when your grandparents and further generations back were all born here.

We never had Grandparents Days growing up. The first time I ever heard of them was in the Montessori DD use to attend for kids in Primary and above. I assumed it was a Montessori thing to 1) get donations and 2) share how different Montessori education is vs traditional education. The Grandparents spent a full hour shadowing the kids and I don't think they ate with them.

So far the only "days" our public school has had for K are: Spirit Day (which we failed at, not owing much in blue+gold), Pajama Day (which DD wanted to wear real clothes for) and there was a Homecoming Festival yesterday, but we had buckets of rain and it just didn't sound like fun in the rain.

[IansMom]

Wow! I had no idea so many people hated grandparents day at the school! Ours is not a fundraising event. I completely understand your points, though. We also have daddy-daughter dance night and mother-son game night.

[jenmcadams]

Wow! I had no idea so many people hated grandparents day at the school! Ours is not a fundraising event. I completely understand your points, though. We also have daddy-daughter dance night and mother-son game night.

I have mixed feelings on these type of events - I know they can be fun and special to share with grandparents/parents, but it's also hard for those who don't have families or relatives who fit the mold. My husband passed away suddenly in April and wouldn't you know that my son's 3rd day back at school after his Dad's death was the Dads with Doughnuts breakfast. It broke my heart when he said it was ok and he would just go in the main door like normal (I had arranged to have him enter a side door and head straight to the classroom to avoid the cafeteria). I think I cried for an hour after drop off that day. I don't want to say that no one can celebrate these things, but the more generic you can make them (I love the VIP idea), the more inclusive they can be

[boltfam]

I have mixed feelings on these type of events - I know they can be fun and special to share with grandparents/parents, but it's also hard for those who don't have families or relatives who fit the mold. My husband passed away suddenly in April and wouldn't you know that my son's 3rd day back at school after his Dad's death was the Dads with Doughnuts breakfast. It broke my heart when he said it was ok and he would just go in the main door like normal (I had arranged to have him enter a side door and head straight to the classroom to avoid the cafeteria). I think I cried for an hour after drop off that day. I don't want to say that no one can celebrate these things, but the more generic you can make them (I love the VIP idea), the more inclusive they can be


:hug5:So sorry for your loss. How hard, and wow, how brave of your DS. It's hard how those types of events just bring the loss to the forefront, not only for the kids but also the adults greiving the loss of a loved one. Honestly, part of the reason my mom didn't go, too, was because grandparents day is hard on HER.

I agree that generic is better, too.

[♥ms.pacman♥]

I have mixed feelings on these type of events - I know they can be fun and special to share with grandparents/parents, but it's also hard for those who don't have families or relatives who fit the mold. My husband passed away suddenly in April and wouldn't you know that my son's 3rd day back at school after his Dad's death was the Dads with Doughnuts breakfast. It broke my heart when he said it was ok and he would just go in the main door like normal (I had arranged to have him enter a side door and head straight to the classroom to avoid the cafeteria). I think I cried for an hour after drop off that day. I don't want to say that no one can celebrate these things, but the more generic you can make them (I love the VIP idea), the more inclusive they can be

oh my goodness, so sorry for your loss. :( this breaks my heart. Huge hugs to your family.