View Full Version : My tween has an 'F' in home room and I'm not sure what to do about it.

11-16-2015, 01:58 PM
DS1 has a 504 for ADHD. Homeroom does not have any "credit". I guess it is just pass/ fail. Also, he's in 6th grade so grades don't matter at all yet. But, this is s pretty good representation of his middle school career in general.

Here's my jumbled thoughts:

DS1 is smart and gets all As on tests. He's not getting behind in subject matter.

He's still figuring out middle school.

Seems like the accommodations are not quite enough perhaps.

I don't want to be a helicopter parent or not let him find his own way.

I think to succeed DS needs more help. Possibly from me but from school for sure but I hate asking for that from the teachers.

Also, I don't want to make things too cushy but at the same time I want him to have a good experience.

I want him to be happy and successful as an adult and don't know what I need to do RIGHT NOW to help him. DH is concerned about the F.

I have s conference on Thursday and am not sure what to ask for.


11-16-2015, 02:09 PM
What is he being graded on in HR?

11-16-2015, 02:13 PM
What part is causing him to have an F? DS1 has an advisory class and it's pass/fail. They get points for participation for the most part.

11-16-2015, 02:15 PM
I can't imagine how they would grade HR. Behavior?

11-16-2015, 02:36 PM
I have one in 6th grade and is home room is his first period class. Does he have a actual homeroom grade or is it his first period class? 6th grade grades do matter here if you want to get into an Arts Program, IB program or several of the other advanced high school programs We get a weighted GPA on his report card. Did you have him tested yet?

11-16-2015, 02:36 PM
I would find out from the teacher what he's being marked down on so he can address it (after asking him if he knows). Or maybe he could ask the teacher? My DD doesn't get a grade for homeroom, and I can't imagine what they'd be graded on except behavior and timely attendance. If it's behavior, maybe he can tell you why he's having a hard time and then he could ask the teacher for help?

My 6th grader has had some issues this year and I'm really trying to coach her from home on how to address them with the teacher before I step in. It's hard! Last night, she told me that she's struggling in one class because she sits in the back row between two boys who are disruptive. As much as I'd love to step in and save her, I told her she needs to go to the teacher first. We even role played what that might sound like. I'm hoping the teacher responds positively and moves her to the front of the class. If her grades start to slip, and she's getting nowhere with the teacher on her own, then I'll talk to the teacher of course.

11-16-2015, 03:42 PM
I agree that you need to hear both sides (his and the teacher's) of what is going on - does he even understand himself why he's failing? I know that DD1 is supposed to be doing schoolwork in homeroom. I don't know if she is graded on it, though - grades are not the worry with her - it's other issues, generally.

11-17-2015, 04:16 AM
I guess he is missing assignments. I didn't have any idea there were any assignments in homeroom! It is "taught" by his math/science teacher and is supposed to be for advising and studying and is only twice a week for 45 minutes each.

So I really think this is just really good proof that he needs more help and that our current system isn't working.

11-17-2015, 07:29 AM
Not turning assignments in seems to be a recurring theme in this age group. My DD's friend is grounded from electronics for the same thing, and she doesn't have ADHD or anything, just didn't do the work because she didn't want to. In DD's science class, there were a few kids who didn't do a project that was worth a test grade. My DD is constantly being texted every night by classmates who forgot the assignment asking for copies. Just something to think about. My DD is as straight laced as they come, but I've caught her lying about band practice times and we've fought over getting homework done.

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11-17-2015, 08:21 AM
I agree with jren. I keep up on N's assignments through his student portal. Its not uncommon for younger middle schoolers to forget to turn things in. Even now I ask. What do you have to do for homework when he gets home. Usually at breakfast I ask what does he have today ( test/ assignments etc)

11-17-2015, 08:59 AM
We go through the online info on Sunday night. Most teachers have it updated for the week by then. We make a list of what homework will be due, tests, etc. In 6th, most of his teachers will take homework late without penalty. Maybe he can make up some of it.

11-17-2015, 07:15 PM
We're just starting middle school this year and there are lots of reasons why a kid might have an F. It's not the end of the world here, it usually means kids forgot to turn something in or completely missed the boat on an assignment. If he missed one day, he may have missed a key assignment, and hopefully you can make it up. At our school they are allowed to make things up and retest if they catch it right away, it is nice having that option and takes off some of the stress. Our teachers also are very open to parent communication, they don't mind hearing from us and encourage us to write if there are issues.

We have a study hall grade here, it's kind of like homeroom - they have to demonstrate that they have their binder and schedule organized. Kind of a placekeeper, but they seem to take everything seriously here, including gym. It definitely takes some time to adjust to middle school and stay on top of things, many of DD's friends have had an F on the online system when they missed a key assignment.

It's good that you noticed it online - now you or DS need to find out why. I would start with seeing if DS can figure it out himself by talking with the homeroom teacher, and if that doesn't work then email the teacher or wait until conferences. The critical point here is the end of the quarter, grades become set at that point, so it's important to resolve any issues by then.