do you have a hobby you enjoy but..

[♥ms.pacman♥]

..you are not good at it, at all??

do you ever struggle with this? a hobby you truly enjoy doing, have been doing for many months/years but then seems like you don't really improve much at it.. and seems like you're constantly watching people who're just starting out already being 10x better at it than you are? LOL.

i got back into running late last year. i did a 15k race earlier this year..and am less than 2 weeks away from my first half-marathon (eek!) in over a decade.

i love running as a stress-reliever...i get the runners high and all that. i sometimes run with coworkers which is great motivation and some socialization. love the excitement after completing a race. and the sense of accomplishment of completing the training/races, especially given i WOH FT and have 2 young kids. and of course the health benefits , yadda yadda.

however, i'm incredibly, ridiculously slow. i'm part of a moms running group on FB and its a blessing and a curse at the same time, as pretty much everyone is much faster than me. group runs sometimes give me major anxiety bc i'm always the one struggling to keep up. i'm fairly thin, have been training for nearly 6 months (and have been doing yoga for years prior) so i feel like i have no excuse to be so slow and i can't help be embarrassed by it. i try to not compare my self to others, but i have to admit, it bugs the crap out of me to meet people who have never run in their lives, ex-smoker, are 30+ lbs overweight, and then after one month of training they're all running 9 min-miles (And here am I struggling to keep 12-minute-per mile pace without passing out ). I love running, but i find this often really tears me down and it tends to take the enjoyment out of it. All the canned advice for getting faster i am already doing up the ying-yang (say to lose weight, train for a race, eat enough healthy foods, do hills, stay hydrated etc).

I admit i'm very type-A and am very good at other things that seem to come difficult to other people (science/technical subjects, etc). I've never ever been athletic person in any way, shape or form, so i wonder if i need to just accept the fact that i will always be a back-of-the-packer no matter what I do. I'm starting to believe that some people are just genetically advantaged for certain things than others. Which is fine by me...though DH TOTALLY disagrees with me on this and thinks everyone has the potential to achieve xxx or yy if they just work hard enough. I find that hard to believe though...i'd say the deck is stacked pretty damn hard against me, athletic-wise. :) I don't think DH gets it because he is one of those people who is pretty strong, well-coordinated and could run pretty fast all while having been a couch potato for years.

Thoughts???

[american_mama]

I can only respond to the very end of your post. In athletics, I don't think hard work can always overcome basic genetics. Maybe you're built slow. Maybe your hard work will improve your speed, but you'll still be slow, just not as slow. That's the way it sounds.

My DH is very athletic and is built for sprinting. He was a state champion in the 300 meter, and easily could have gotten a full scholarship in track (but he got one in football instead as a running back). He used to run distance with a friend who is built for it, and the friend would eat him up, but put them on a track, and my DH will blow him away. Different builds, different muscles.

[gymnbomb]

As an exercise physiologist, I can assure you that while almost everyone has the ability to improve, everyone does NOT have the ability to get to xxx level. Everyone has his or her own personal theoretical maximal capacity that they can approach through training, but there is a huge range in what that personal max is. If you love it, keep doing it and be proud of yourself! You are getting tremendous physical and psychological benefit from it no matter what your pace :)


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[hellokitty]

OMG, when I read your title, I immediately thought about running, without knowing that was also going to be your story! :) About 4-5 years ago, I started running, I loved it, but sucked at it . I'm what's known as penguin... I will never run fast, as fast as I try, if a saber tooth lion was chasing a group of ppl, even with that motivation, I'd probably still be the one eaten first. Then I injured my knee about 1.5 years into it, I was supposed to get surgery for it, but instead, I took a year off doing pretty much NOTHING (only standing if I had to, avoided activity) and it calmed down, but I still feel like I could tweak it very easily. I've since then given up on running. I wish I would have started when I was younger, but I started when I was in my very late 30's and my body rebelled. I agree with you, I have a lot of friends who run, almost all of them run faster than me, even when I was doing well and had trained. It's frustrating to want to be good at something, but trying harder and practicing more doesn't produce that result. However, I've also seen several of them, as they hit 40, end up with knee injuries, however a lot of them try to go back to running. I'm too spooked to do that.

Now I walk. I know that sounds hokey, but due to my knee injury and fear of re-injury, I refuse to do anything high impact again. My paid job, actually involves promoting walking to prevent chronic disease, and so I have seen the evidence that walking as lifestyle change is effective, beneficial and reasonably sustainable. I also enjoy walking with DH, we walk at least 50 min a day about 3-6x a week. Here is the sad part. We walk very fast (when the dog isn't with us) and I can walk almost as fast as I ran... it just makes me shake my head that it's like I did it for nothing and injured my knee for nothing. I should have just stuck to walking to begin with, my joints thank me. I still get sore hips, but I think that's b/c I'm in my mid-40's. I miss running, but it was also a very humbling experience. One of the few times in my life I have not been able to master something I tried.

[specialp]

Yes, I have, but athletics are a different subject all the way around.

DH is a runner. He said the First Running Program helped him on his time. He said it is too late now if the half is in 2 weeks, but for the future info. it could help you improve your time a bit. He said something about speed/tempo work easy run in the week, etc., but now we have screaming kids around (spring break here) so that was all I got.

I do not think the competition aspect ever bothered him because his whole job is competition with others. It was nice to find a hobby where it was all about competing with himself. He also didn't run with others in the beginning because he really had to squeeze runs in schedule. But he did join a group and started trail running and mountain biking on the weekends and I know he came home a sore body and sore ego a few times!

Seriously. Be proud of yourself and stick with it and forget about keeping up with others (or your end up hurting yourself). I have zero athletic ability. I'm pretty amazed I manage to walk that's how uncoordinated I am. I really admire you for doing this!

[Corie]

I have this pinned on my Pinterest page.

http://i196.photobucket.com/albums/aa274/jellybellysmama/fd55a3ca05230c5b54d9af0abd922583_zps8keigvtm.jpg (http://s196.photobucket.com/user/jellybellysmama/media/fd55a3ca05230c5b54d9af0abd922583_zps8keigvtm.jpg.h tml)

[hillview]

Yes. Running and crossfit. Progress is painfully slow. Not used to that. I try to set different goals. Like go 4 days a week vs speed / weights (for xfit)

[egoldber]

You can come and be my running buddy LOL! :) I hear you on the running groups and all of them being too fast. It can be very disheartening. I was actually just complaining to DH that were no running groups for slow women lol!

I have spent the last 2 years trying to get below 10 minute miles. I started at 12 minutes, so it's taken me about a year per minute to consistently improve my pace. I can now just barely run 3 miles at times between 9 and 10 minutes every time I run and it feels like a huge accomplishment.

It also seems like you have been focusing on increasing distance vs pace. I think for most people you have to do one or the other. My goal now is to run a 10K, and I have started to train for that. But there is no way I could improve time AND also improve pace at the same time. I don't have the time to put into that.

[StantonHyde]

Oh yes!!! Running, swimming, triathlon---and I love it!!!! I do it for me. I am not a competitive person. I compete against myself only. And I do get better every year. My motto is that you just have to out live your competition and then you'll be the best!!! Wait till you get in the 50 and up group--it gets better!!!

[SnuggleBuggles]

I'm also a slow runner. I have good days but those put me at 9.5-10 min/mile. One day I did 8 on the treadmill. That was amazing...and it was only 2 miles. I joke that I'm not good at either speed nor endurance. I'm good in the 3-5 mile range.

I dislike running with others. I prefer to have the quiet to think. I also hate trying to coordinate pace. I just don't bother anymore.


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[mom_hanna]

I have to say I admire you for sticking with running even though you think you are not fast and get discouraged by the improvement you see in others. I am a runner/swimmer/cyclist and do fairly well at all three, but I am often more impressed by those who are out there purely for the enjoyment of it and don't care if they are at the back of the pack. I would think about what you would tell your kids if they had a hobby they really liked but didn't think they were good at. Would you tell them that how good they are doesn't matter as long as they enjoy it? And to keep at it and not worry what other people think? That's what I'd tell you! Keep it up! It's good for you physically and mentally and you enjoy it when you don't compare yourself to others. If you want to work at getting faster, by all means, do that, but if you really just want to enjoy it, then do that. There are probably many others like myself who are still impressed with you regardless of your speed.

[Philly Mom]

I am a very slow runner and cannot do over 3 miles. My body gives out so I commend you. I also like to run with people but no one is as slow as me. I have been doing pure barre the past month. I am not good and only getting marginally better. I like it though so I will keep doing it.


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[Twoboos]

Oh I hear you. For me it's tennis (although I am no great runner, if I've been training I can do about a 10min mile). I started playing with casual lessons once a week about 4 years ago. This past fall I started on a team, practicing 2-3 times a week and one game a week. And I am just not good. My season was terrible (2-9 record, it was brutal). Each week I decided I was going to quit! :p But I keep going back.

My coaches and teammates say I am much better than when I started on the team, but really all those loses take a mental toll. And to see all the others keep winning... I'm happy for them but want that, too. (Yeesh that sounds so whiney.) The coach wants to make sure we're having fun, and I am but jeez, it's WAY more fun to win!

I do like it, and I am determined to improve, for whatever that's worth LOL. :rotflmao:

[khm]

OP you are awesome! I think it is great that you are so into running! I get that it'd be hard to have newer runners surpass you though. :( I do think some people just "get" running. Their bodies and muscle types are suited for it and it comes more easily for them than for others. I think some people can train for a short bit and be really good at it, others can't.

Maybe get a real running coach for a bit? Maybe there is some quirk to your cadence or your breathing that is holding you back. If there isn't, well, then you'll know are are at your max and you are awesome for rocking it!!

I hate running. Hate. I do kickboxing. I'll never be the Before/After poster girl at the gym and there is no "competition" in hitting a bag, so I had to set up my own goals. I have a crazy auto-highlighting spreadsheet that I use to keep track of how many times I go. My goal is to end up with an average of 4/week or better after a year. My goal is to do each workout like I MEAN it. My improvements are more internal than external. My body just is not one that is capable of the radical changes that make the fitness ads. I don't think I could do workouts with public goals and records, it'd just bum me out, though I do like the group feeling of going to a gym, I'm glad there are no numbers to compare on a board.

If you like the group aspect of your running, then embrace it. Be the person that helps the new runners. Go do races where you don't know anyone. Make a goal to do more races than the others ;), or just X more than you did last year? Something that is just yours.

[94bruin]

This is a timely thread. I'm just starting to get back into running. (I ran track in cross country in jr high/ running has been my primary method of exercise through the years.) While this may not be for many people, I just discovered the Jeff Galloway method of running. He's more about running and finishing races rather than speed, which I think is great. He also recommend running at intervals, which is something I'm still trying to wrap my head around. But he says that it helps prevent injuries. I have to say that it's great. I used to be able to run maybe about 30 mins straight (at a very slow pace.) But with his run-walk-run method, I can go much father. I'm not concerned about speed at this time, but hope that it'll come slowly. I'm just happy to be able to run-walk-run farther than I've been able to run continuously in a long time.

I like the meme that Corie posted up top. Also, on some running forums (specifically Disney race forums), they say that DLF>DNF>DNS. DLF=dead last finish. DNF=did not finish. DNS=Did not start.

[SnuggleBuggles]

This is a timely thread. I'm just starting to get back into running. (I ran track in cross country in jr high/ running has been my primary method of exercise through the years.) While this may not be for many people, I just discovered the Jeff Galloway method of running. He's more about running and finishing races rather than speed, which I think is great. He also recommend running at intervals, which is something I'm still trying to wrap my head around. But he says that it helps prevent injuries. I have to say that it's great. I used to be able to run maybe about 30 mins straight (at a very slow pace.) But with his run-walk-run method, I can go much father. I'm not concerned about speed at this time, but hope that it'll come slowly. I'm just happy to be able to run-walk-run farther than I've been able to run continuously in a long time.

I like the meme that Corie posted up top. Also, on some running forums (specifically Disney race forums), they say that DLF>DNF>DNS. DLF=dead last finish. DNF=did not finish. DNS=Did not start.


Just stay at the back of the pack if you want to run/ walk in a race! I had the misfortune of being behind 2 ladies who were alternating running vs walking in a half marathon. Because the start of the race was so crowded, I was stuck behind them and almost tripped when they came to an abrupt walk after having a nice running pace before that. Great for training- terrible for participating in a crowded race. :)

[twowhat?]

As an exercise physiologist, I can assure you that while almost everyone has the ability to improve, everyone does NOT have the ability to get to xxx level.
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Absolutely YES. I picked up ballroom dance in college and LOVED IT. But there is no way ever in hell no matter how much I practiced or trained that I would EVER get really good at it. My body is not built for it. My legs are bent in funny ways, my feet point out in funny ways (I tripped LOTS of partners), and my back has a deep arch to it. All genetics. But as a hobby it was so much fun!!!

Running is not something I ever in my lifetime will ever enjoy - it's just plain painful to run. My body mechanics are just not built for efficiency when it comes to running and although I would improve with training, I would never, ever be good at it or even enjoy it.

The definition of hobby doesn't include "being good at it" ;) It just means "enjoying it"!

You should totally get that "A 12-min mile is just as far as a 6-min mile" put on a t-shirt!! I love that!!

[AnnieW625]

I am a very slow runner and cannot do over 3 miles. My body gives out so I commend you. I also like to run with people but no one is as slow as me. I have been doing pure barre the past month. I am not good and only getting marginally better. I like it though so I will keep doing it.


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This is me as well, but I honestly don't enjoy running much. I can walk a 13 minute mile so I would prefer to walk if I have to.

If I had the time and money I would do more yoga, and probably do something like Cross Fit because I started working with free weights way back in the mid to late 90s when it wasn't normal or trendy for women to do so; must women only did machines or just cardio and I always did a mix of everything and was never intimidated by free weights. I do my own little workouts at my regular gym, but I think Crossfit could be helpful for me.

[♥ms.pacman♥]

thanks everyone!! feeling better about it now. i try not to compare myself and focus on the positive benefits of running (my resting HR went from 82 to 66 bpm in 4 months!!), but sometimes it's still hard given i'm still pretty slow and i still get very winded even going at a very slow pace. especially with social media (FB group, everyone posting screenshots of their runs all the time), i come across sooo many posts with things like "had an awful run, had to push baby in the stroller and am recovering from the flu, hence the super slow pace", and it's like a 10-minute-mile pace. Grrr!! Makes me feel like crap. On a good day i will do 11:30 or 12minutes-per-mile. I don't know, I guess I also have a very low tolerance for all the passive-agressive, fishing-for-complements that so many moms do on Facebook and the like (not just running, but other stuff) so it's a double-whammy. i feel like there is so much of that "Mompetition", and whose the biggest mom-martyr crap going around that i don't need more of it.

and yeah, love that meme. many days i don't even make 12-minute-miles though, LOL!



they say that DLF>DNF>DNS. DLF=dead last finish. DNF=did not finish. DNS=Did not start.

Ok I LOVE this!!!! So stealing it!!!!

and good point re: training for speed vs. distance. i haven't done tempo/intervals but probably should. i think after this race i'm going to focus on shorter distances and speed..and also strength train. also especially bc very soon it will be way too hot here to run much more than a couple miles!!

[SnuggleBuggles]

Block those braggarts. I don't have anyone like that. My feed is a peaceful place. :). If your running group is the problem, turn off notifications and only click over to them if you need to know something or if you had a great run and their self congratulations won't bug you. :)


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[jent]

"Wisely and slow. They stumble that run fast."
-- Shakespeare

In college, a good friend was a cross-country runner. He loved it, but was never fast enough to be competitive. He & his friends at the back of the pack dubbed themselves the "slowboys" and had t-shirts made up with the ^^^ quote.

DH also loves cycling... but is always at the back of the pack, no matter how hard he trains. But 20 years later he is still riding any chance he gets.

[mikala]

Right there with you, op. I'm just not built to run fast and it's disconcerting that my running pace isn't much faster than some of the power walkers I've encountered. I've been tempted to buy this: https://www.etsy.com/listing/245675849/funny-womens-running-flowy-tank-top-i?ref=market

Or this: https://www.etsy.com/listing/188920815/i-run-slower-than-internet-explorer-on?ref=market

[dogmom]

Welcome to the club of slow runners! I average around 11-12 minutes for my run, although I was on the shorter side for my one half marathon race, which surprised me. The only reason not running 9 min /mile bothers me is unless I can get to that I'm never going to run a marathon. A couple of thoughts:

1) You may have more slow twitch than fast twitch fiber. This is basically genetic. You can get faster, but for some people it might be easier to get faster than you and you will never be a great sprinter. But if you aren't aiming to come in first for a race this shouldn't matter.

2)Stress, diet, sleep deprivation will also affect your pace.

3) You can improve your pace, but you need to look at some training programs and do different paces, sprints, and so on.

Having said all that I have no interest in that kind of training. I run because it is the most efficient way to exercise, I can zone out, it keeps me sane, I've lost a ton of weight doing it, it keeps me sane, it's easy for me now that I'm used to it. It would not be as relaxing or easy if I had to pay attention to intervals/pace time/stuff like that.

So "good" is all relative. What do you want to get from it? If you aren't getting it, then do something. If you are otherwise getting it, keep doing what you are doing.

[squimp]

Find a friend who runs at your speed. I am very slow but I accept it. I have a friend who will run at my speed and just chat, it is great. It's OK to not be type A in every aspect of your life. :) Hobbies are supposed to be good for our mental health, it sounds like this is adding more stress.

[♥ms.pacman♥]

I run because it is the most efficient way to exercise, I can zone out, it keeps me sane, I've lost a ton of weight doing it, it keeps me sane, it's easy for me now that I'm used to it. It would not be as relaxing or easy if I had to pay attention to intervals/pace time/stuff like that.

oh wow, you totally hit the nail on the head! i think that is a big reason why i run ..it's a major stress-reliever (keeps my sanity), as it does let me zone out, and yes, it's most efficient..i don't need to drive to the gym or to a pool or whatever, i can just go out the door and run. i ran at lunch yesterday with coworkers and it was great.

and yes one friend commented to me that she did hire a trainer to help her get faster but then all the intervals/tempo runs were not enjoyable at all and often got physically sick at the end. that's the thing that happens to me if i TRY to go fast AT ALL..i either start blacking out or feel like i'm going to puke. DH says "oh but that's what you have to do" but then, i guess if that is how it is, then i'm fine being a slow-poke! :)

and yes, the sleep issue i admit is huge for me. as a WOH mom during the week i normally get around 6 hrs of sleep only, as i have to be out of the house with DS by 7:30am (and then i go off to work). i can't go to bed early bc i have to cram all the chores (making lunches, cleaning up) after getting home from work and kids are in bed and i NEED time at the end of the day to unwind! i am fine with that, but then for running it's not always ideal and i can feel that my legs feel like lead on days i don't get enough sleep.

[citymama]

Almost all my hobbies! (Well, except gardening - and that's probably thanks to good soil and CA sunshine.) I've been doing yoga for 25 years but you'd think I started a year ago based on my level (still working on headstands). I have the balance down but don't have the flexibility and strength. There are 70 year old women in my class who are more flexible than me. But that doesn't stop me.

Music is the other one. I have played guitar since a young teen, but I've never gotten much better than I was at 21. I haven't given it the time and I have less time every day. But I love it when I do play so why stop?

As for running, I salute you! I quit years ago but still harbor dreams of resuming. I was never great, but boy, was I in good shape when I ran. You go, girl, however slow you may be, that's an inspiration to the rest of us walkers had couch potatoes!