Pre-tween with under arm hair who wants to shave - WWYD? BTDT?

[magnoliaparadise]

This is a small issue in the scheme of life, but being talked about by DD right now so I'd love your opinions.

DD1, 10 years old, has noticeable hair under her armpits - not a full amount yet, but not a tiny amount either. It's dark and obvious. In other ways, DD1 not shown much sign of puberty. Even her arm and leg hair remain the same; They have not changed color or thickness.

In the last few months, DD1 has talked about the under arm hair, but never seemed to care much so I didn't say anything about it. I did wonder in passing if other kids would say anything when they saw it, but did not share that. This week, DD came home from school and said that now that she is wearing t-shirts with the warm weather, she is embarrassed by the armpit hair and worried that she will get teased. She is afraid to raise her arms in class, go on the monkey bars with friends, or lift her arms playing games in recess, etc.

DD1 asked if she should start shaving or somehow removing just her under arm hair. It's much earlier than I anticipated (I was 13 when I started), but I told her that I will let her make the decision. DD1 asked what other options there might be available.


** Has anyone BTDT?

** Is there a disadvantage to removing hair at her age? If so, is there anything that you would suggest that I have her do instead?
For instance, I always thought that hair removal causes the hair to grow back thicker - if so, that would be a disadvantage. I just googled and this is apparently a myth, but I have to say, I still think it's true from my experience. So.. if it is true that hair grows back thicker, I would rather not have my DD1 start so early, though will give her the choice. If it's a myth, I suppose there is no harm in just starting to remove hair early.

** If DD1 removes it, is there an advantage between shaving, waxing, hair removal lotion, or plucking at her age? I think plucking would be too painful for her and she would not want that.

** Is there any advantage to just bleaching the underarm hair for awhile? My friend in HS used to bleach hair above her upper lip (before she got electrolysis) and that did the trick. Hair under the arms is longer, but also less obviously because it's not on the face, so maybe bleaching would work.
The only issue with this is bleaching - a mom friend is a hairdresser and doesn't like bleaching pre-puberty. Frankly, though, I don't know if that counts as much on such a small amount of hair under the arm. And plenty of kids bleach there hair, so I think people differ on whether bleach is bad anyway.

TIA.

[JBaxter]

Its her body and if she is self conscious let her shave it. I used to wax my son's unibrow from middle school. I have a 14 yr old that doesn't really have more than a suggestion of a mustache and he uses an electric razor across it once a month or so. Waxing hurts hair removal lotion is irritating and a bunch of chemicals plucking hurts get her an inexpensive electric razor for now and let her shave it.

[klwa]

Of the options you list, I think shaving is the best one.

As for your question, no, shaving doesn't cause the hair to grow back thicker. There are several reasons it seems like it does, one of which is that when you start shaving is the same time frame as when the hair is starting to come in thicker anyway due to puberty. So if she feels comfortable shaving, I'd go that route. If she isn't comfortable shaving, I'd try Nair or something like that. That's what I started with due to fear of the razor. I stopped when I developed a rash after using it one time & switched to razors.

I wouldn't go with bleaching. As you said, the hair is longer and in situations like you mentioned, you can still see it when bleached.

[Kindra178]

Just shave it! Show her how you do it. Also, underarm hair isn’t puberty, it’s actually adrenarche.

https://pedclerk.bsd.uchicago.edu/page/premature-thelarche-and-adrenarche


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[georgiegirl]

Just shave it! My DD started soon after she turned 11 I think. I just showed her how to shave it with one of my Venus disposable razors. Easy peasy. And then a few months ago (right before she turned 12) she started shaving her legs without even mentioning it to me. Definitely follow her lead. If she wants the hair gone, then definitely shave it. It’s actually will also lessen body odor to have hairless arm pits.


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[trcy]

Agree with others, let her shave it. I think I used an electric razor when I first started.


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[Dayzy]

I agree, let her shave it. Perhaps with an electric until she gets the hang of it better.

[MSWR0319]

Just let her shave it! My friend had to have her daughter start shaving at 8. I have sons, but our pediatrician told me that armpit hair is not a sign of puberty. He said it's the pubic hair you don't want to see early. I'm assuming that's the same for girls, but not sure.

[mom2binsd]

Agree with others, my DD shaved her underarms with a razor at that age, get her a decent razor and teach her to lather, my DD likes Silk shaving cream and show her how to pull the skin to make it easy. Shaving isn't that hard to learn.

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[BunnyBee]

Let her shave. The growing back thicker is a myth. My oldest started with a waterproof electric shaver thing, then moved on to the Schick Intuition blades with the built in cream. She also wanted to shave around 9 and menarche didn’t hit until almost 13. 10 wouldn’t be concerningly “early” for puberty, but underarm and leg hair isn’t related.

[specialp]

Just let her shave it. It'll be one or two swipes. Not a big deal. I was that 9 or 10 and immediately shaved it the day I noticed it. I remember it took a long time (well, longer than it does now) for it to grow back for me to have to shave it again.

[DualvansMommy]

agree with others. let her shave it. so many options with razors that work much better than my time as a pre-teen! you wouldn't want your DD to be self conscious about her body now, so if shaving helps her to reduce that. By all means, let her.

[sariana]

It seems thicker because it has a blunt end from being cut with the razor rather than a tapered end like natural hair. It's not a myth; I witnessed it when a friend had leg surgery as a tween. The hair that was shaved for the surgery looked thicker and darker than the surrounding hair. It wasn't a huge difference, but it depends on the her real texture of the hair, too.

[baymom]

I agree with other PPs that you should let her shave. But, with that said, I’m hoping to convince my own 12 yr old DD to wax when the time comes. I’ve several girlfriends who have gone this route (I’m too wimpy to wax my pits!) and after a while, their hair has grown back super thin and sparse.

[chottumommy]

I agree with other PPs that you should let her shave. But, with that said, I’m hoping to convince my own 12 yr old DD to wax when the time comes. I’ve several girlfriends who have gone this route (I’m too wimpy to wax my pits!) and after a while, their hair has grown back super thin and sparse.

I would suggest this route too. Seriously it doesn't hurt much especially if you start young and have finer hair. I started at 12/13 and starting 30s I hardly have any armpit hair. Just one or two that I pluck out. Haven't shaved/waxed anything in over 8 years. Same with my leg hair. I hardly have any after waxing for a decade.

[ourbabygirl]

Yeah, I started shaving my DD's armpits this year (she's 9), even though it's light, but very noticeable, and with swimming lessons and warm weather, I didn't want her getting teased. We kind of trade off shaving it and only do it once a week at the most.
Glad to hear it's not a sign of full-on puberty yet! :banana:

[AnnieW625]

Let her shave it herself if it makes her more comfortable. I started getting pubic hair at 10 (almost 11, but still) and armpit hair around 11 or 12. I didn’t get my period until I was 12, and breasts till 12 (and honestly didn’t need a bra until 14).


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[calebsmama03]

Let her do what she wants. My DD (almost 13) actually prefers to pluck. Her choice. She also plucks her unibrow. She has no interest in doing anything to her legs yet. Her armpit hairs are getting too numerous to pluck now and she has actually asked me for a eiplator now. I couldn't do it but she has no problem with plucking so she'll be fine. lol

[magnoliaparadise]

Hi Everyone,

Thanks for your replies. I agree that my DD1 should do whatever she wants. I didn't think it would be so soon, but do not object. I was just curious as to whether certain ways to go about it were better for a pre-tween and if anyone had experienced a pre-tween shaving (or waxing/plucking). DD said she said is going to think about it and wants to research it by looking at Youtube videos.
Thanks!

[magnoliaparadise]

Just shave it! Show her how you do it. Also, underarm hair isn’t puberty, it’s actually adrenarche.

https://pedclerk.bsd.uchicago.edu/page/premature-thelarche-and-adrenarche


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Kindra178 and MSWR013, thanks for your information about adrenarche. I didn't know this - Very helpful.

[ChicagoNDMom]

Have never heard of plucking underarm hair. Just give her a safety razor and a demo. I would be much more concerned about her limiting physical activity due to embarrassment than I would be of any dangers of shaving.

[essnce629]

Just let her shave! 10 years old is definitely not young! I was shaving my legs at that age and so is my best friend's daughter who is the same age. Light public hair started at 10 too and period at 12. This is the normal age for the beginning of puberty.

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