OCD and anxiety tips for preschoolers

[Melaine]

I'm asking this for my sister. She is pretty sure her son, almost 4 is having anxiety and some mild OCD, and I would agree.

It's not possible for them to do therapy or anything at this point, she is more looking for ways to help him move past when he is obsessing or tantruming. She is doing major diet changes right now that have already helped. I think he is having more issues at this moment because they've been cooped up with crazy weather and there is lots of stress because my sister is about 1 week out from her due date with #3.

example, he couldn't get over the fact that his blankets weren't "tight enough" or "smooth enough" at naptime and he was screaming and losing it. She had him count his fingers and then read books and take deep breaths and eventually he settled down. Does anyone have other coping mechanisms to help with this? Thank you!

[StantonHyde]

The book Freeing Your Child from Anxiety is fantastic with practical tips and interventions

[georgiegirl]

Unfortunately, I don’t think it will get better with a new baby arriving. I’m guessing he is sensing the impending changes and is freaking out.

My DS2 is 6 and has anxiety and probably OCD. He will be starting a curriculum at school about flexible thinking (just had his first ever IEP meeting this past week). Some sort of comic book thing. I think empathy is the best approach. Kids whose brains are locked down because of anxiety and OCD can’t really be reasoned with. Playful parenting also might help...being silly and funny will help distract a child who is fixated on something.


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[StantonHyde]

I just re-read your nephews comments about the blankets--could be a sensory issue as well. And he is totally keyed up because of the new baby. Can you help by taking the baby some so she gets more 1:1 time with your nephew?

[marymoo86]

Epsom salt baths? Perhaps the magnesium could help?

[petesgirl]

If he likes deep breathing, there is a cute book called 'alphabreaths ' by Christopher Willard that teaches different breathing techniques. Maybe she could find a calming meditation for him to listen to.
That combo of conditions sounds like the perfect storm.

[Melaine]

If he likes deep breathing, there is a cute book called 'alphabreaths ' by Christopher Willard that teaches different breathing techniques. Maybe she could find a calming meditation for him to listen to.
That combo of conditions sounds like the perfect storm.

Oh my goodness....this book looks WONDERFUL and he is the perfect age to really connect with it. Am ordering this right now, thank you!!!

[Melaine]

I just re-read your nephews comments about the blankets--could be a sensory issue as well. And he is totally keyed up because of the new baby. Can you help by taking the baby some so she gets more 1:1 time with your nephew?

Me or my mom will be there for a few days when she delivers and my mom will likely spend some weeks up there to help out with the other two kids. Unfortunately, she is a couple hours away so I can't spend extended time there at this time of year (maybe in summer when school is out). Her husband does work from home a lot so she will have more help that way

[Melaine]

Epsom salt baths? Perhaps the magnesium could help?

I know my sis uses epsom salt baths all the time but not sure she has tried with him. Good thought. I'm a huge fan myself!

[Liziz]

Kids whose brains are locked down because of anxiety and OCD can’t really be reasoned with. Playful parenting also might help...being silly and funny will help distract a child who is fixated on something.


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My DD1 struggles with this (and always has) - and though it's still true, especially when she was younger, this was always my best bet. It was consistently hard for me to remember, but worked better than anything else. Like we were at a restaurant once and she ALL worked up about something insignificant (to everyone but her, of course). I ended up bringing her to the bathroom (to get her tantruming away from everyone), and started making silly faces at her in the mirror. After a minute, she started laughing, and it "broke" the tantrum....and as soon as the tantrum broke, the issue behind the tantrum went away as well. What I found when she was younger was that there was zero point in going back and discussing the issue that sparked the anxiety/tantrum/OCD behavior. I'd use goofiness to "fix" the situation at the time, then just move on without discussion. I did/have from a young age been talking with her a lot about feelings, how to express herself, ways to calm down, etc. -- but not when she was upset or close after.

One other thing that I found was amazing for breaking a tantrum (not specifically for an anxious child, but I do think it helps) -- I'd get right in DD's face use a very stern, forceful voice (I had to, so she'd "hear" me in the midst of the tantrum) and direct her to give me a simple list "DD, quick, tell me something that is blue" or "DD, quick, name two animals. Now. Go!" Sometimes I'd need to start ("Cow is an animal. Dog is an animal. Your turn. Tell me an animal!") I can't remember the exact logic behind this approach, but it basically pushes the kids brain to use a different, calmer part (the part that would make lists of animals, say colors, etc.) instead of the part that is freaking out. I was skeptical at first because I just thought throwing something else at my anxious child in the midst of freaking out would just make her more anxious, but it usually worked - she'd slowly start listing animals, or colors, or whatever I'd asked -- and be calm much faster.

[mm123]

I'm asking this for my sister. She is pretty sure her son, almost 4 is having anxiety and some mild OCD, and I would agree.

It's not possible for them to do therapy or anything at this point, she is more looking for ways to help him move past when he is obsessing or tantruming. She is doing major diet changes right now that have already helped. I think he is having more issues at this moment because they've been cooped up with crazy weather and there is lots of stress because my sister is about 1 week out from her due date with #3.

example, he couldn't get over the fact that his blankets weren't "tight enough" or "smooth enough" at naptime and he was screaming and losing it. She had him count his fingers and then read books and take deep breaths and eventually he settled down. Does anyone have other coping mechanisms to help with this? Thank you!

You could try this book: https://www.amazon.com/What-When-Brain-Stuck-What/dp/1591478057/ref=mp_s_a_1_1?keywords=what+to+do+when+your+brain +gets+stuck&qid=1581266832&sprefix=what+to+do&sr=8-1

I’ve used a few books in the same series with my anxious DD, (What to do When You Worry Too Much, What To Do When You Dread Your Bed), and they are great.

[BunnyBee]

If this has been a sudden onset issue or if it has significantly increased, I would want to rule out PANDAS/PANS.