Should I give this gift for no gifts requested party?

[elbenn]

I know based on the title that the answer is obvious, but hear me out. DS2 is invited to a birthday party. We got the birthday boy a ball and a shirt of his favorite sports team. I was just reviewing the invite and in tiny print at the bottom of the message it says "no gifts please." So I won't give the ball, but should I still give the shirt? I already bought it and I think he would like it.

[SnuggleBuggles]

If you can return it, I probably would. If not, just discreetly hand it off on arrival. You won’t be the only ones that bring a gift.


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[elbenn]

If it makes a difference, I can give it to her the day before the party. I can return it though.

[SnuggleBuggles]

Are the kids extra close buddies? If so, give the gift.


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[AnnieW625]

Just be honest with the mom and say you didn’t see the no gifts notation on the invite. I think you will be fine....you could give it pre or post party. I would give the ball and the shirt.


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[bisous]

Oh my gosh. I just have to vent. DD got invited to a party where the instructions were “bring a book for K teachers class”. So we did that and bought a nice book. But lots of people brought presents anyway. The birthday kid didn’t seem to understand the books weren’t for him.

Then at another party the kid actually said to me “are you give (other birthday party child) a better present? I hope so!

(I don’t believe this 5yo is badly behaved. He just really doesn’t understand!)

Anyway, sort of off topic but this has grated on me lately!

[carolinacool]

If it makes a difference, I can give it to her the day before the party. I can return it though.

I would do this if the boy is a close friend. You bought the gift before you saw the note. Most of the time, I think, people who do no-gift parties are trying to avoid more "stuff." To me, an article of clothing is different.

[TwinFoxes]

If you give it, I'd do it before/after so you don't make the people who followed the instructions feel like suckers.

[JustMe]

I like the idea of doing it the day before and explaining to the mom that you bought it without seeing the request for no gifts. Likely some people will show up with gifts to the party anyway, so that would not be terrible, but I feel that is disrespectful both to the host and the people who don't bring gifts.