Masks and Little Kids

[bisous]

Please talk some sense into me. I'm totally pro mask. I wear one if I'm not alone in my office and whenever I set foot in an indoor space for any reason (store, post office, whatever). I believe they significantly slow the spread of the virus and that they protect the wearer and others that share the same space.

I'm ok with my middle schooler and high schooler wearing them to school.

I'm worried about my 2 littles wearing them to school.

I don't want to be one of THOSE people that advocate against this step, particularly if it protects the vulnerable teachers. I'm inclined to just withdraw them from school and when I'm honest, mask wearing is one of my biggest concerns. I don't want to damage the school any further by withdrawing my kids. But I am worried about them. Not only do I think that wearing them will be difficult to enforce for the teacher, I also worry it will degrade their learning experience in a way that can be detrimental to them. They both are being diagnosed right now for suspected ADHD. DS3 has some sensory issues as well.

Talk to me about this concern. I really want to do the right thing for my kids and for society.

If I truly feel masks aren't possible, I won't be arguing agains kids wearing them in the class. I'll more likely withdraw them from in-person school altogether. I fear that even this could have negative effects on my broader community.

Would love to hear your thoughts!

[gymnbomb]

Have they had opportunities to practice with them outside the house? Both of my kids (6 and almost 3) hated them and didn't want to wear them long at home. The 6 year old would leave his on long enough for me to figure out if it fit well. The toddler wouldn't even really do that. But recently we've all been to the zoo twice (masks required) and my 6 year old has also been to one doctor's appointment and to a donut making class with his mask on. They do sooooo much better out of the house than at home. They do need some reminders, but I've decided it's good to give them those opportunities to practice. They also do better if they get to pick which mask they wear from a few options. I know that we've only had to wear them for an hour or hour and a half at a time, but honestly I have been so impressed with how they have done!

That said, if you feel it would be better for your kids to be at home for any reason, I wouldn't hesitate to make the choice that is best for your family!

[PZMommy]

My youngest has had to wear a mask in certain situations since he was very little. It just takes practice.

[MSWR0319]

My 8 year old wears his with no problems. At first he always tried to itch his face the minute he got it on, but we discussed that you shouldn’t touch your face and he’s gotten better. He picked his masks so he likes to wear them. I’m actually worried more about my 6th grader wearing his because he doesn’t want to seem “uncool”. DS2 also likes to walk around the house in it. Could you have yours practice?

[AustenFan]

My 7 and 9 year old complained at first about wearing masks but have gotten accustomed to wearing them in a couple settings for a couple hours. I don't know how they would do all day, but whenever we go back to church, I will be requiring them to wear them for a while, I imagine.

My 3 year old, however, has intense sensory issues and will not wear a mask. She has a lot of trauma from all the medical issues at the beginning of her life, and I have taken her in to CHLA as well as several other dr offices for check-ups and have only been questioned on her age/wearing a mask twice. I tried to put one on her the first time and she had a total panic attack. When the nurse at the door of CHLA asked the second time, I told her she was 3 but had sensory issues that would not tolerate a mask. Because of that, she will not be attending special needs preschool this fall or attending any indoor therapy sessions (or church) until things get better. Her neurologist suggested this week that we at least look into hippotherapy because that would be outside and lower risk, especially if the therapists working with her were wearing masks. The rest of us are extra careful any time we're out of the house, and she has only been in public for those 6 or 7 required appointments in the past four months, so that is just where we're at with her. When we had her meeting with a psychologist this fall, she was able to help me understand how much sensory issues and trauma are truly a serious deal for kids who are not typical, and they don't have an easy fix. For a neurotypical child, I might try to gently push the mask issue before school starts. It is not ideal but maybe manageable? For a child with other stuff going on, I would err on the side of eliminating another sensory trigger in their life and keep them home if you have the ability. I know that not everyone does have that ability. My BFF works at a private school for kids with disabilities, and the end of the school year was horrible for those kiddos, most of whom don't have the ability to just stay home. Hugs to all who don't have options.

[georgiegirl]

I would invest in face shields. They are way easier to wear. We purchased 4 kids masks from eBay for about $20. My youngest (who is the same age as your DD) has worn his mask on a few occasions. He has a bunch of issues (anxiety, OCD, and maybe ASD). My 10 year old with adhd wears his. Both boys are freaked out by covid and they refuse to go back to school unless masks are required.


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[doberbrat]

Have you tried the gaiter type 'masks' or a simple scarf? A thinner scarf would provide less protection for everyone but may be tolerated better which would be worth the trade off?

[Liziz]

I totally understand your feelings and have wrestled with them myself. Currently, my school is not requiring (or even encouraging) masks, and I don't plan to make my kids wear them in school (although I'm very pro-mask and wear mine anywhere I'm in contact with other people, and would have my kids doing the same if I let them out and about right now, which I don't). However, I did just order a few kid-size masks w/ elastic (our current ones are all tie straps and the kids can't handle those w/o help) and plan to start working with my kids on getting used to them, in case cases increase here and policies change. I'll continue to send my kids to school even if they're required to wear a mask.

Ultimately, I don't think it will be detrimental to their learning experience. I think there's certain situations that would make it tough (like it might be really hard in speech therapy, or something like that), and it definitely would have an adjustment curve, but humans, especially young ones, are actually quite adaptable. It's all about how we frame it and how we enforce/reinforce it. I just started thinking of a mask like any other item of apparel. No one questions the need to wear shirts, even for kids with sensory issues. Same thing with shoes, socks, etc. My DD has extreme sensory issues related to her socks/shoes and feet -- but I've never considered homeschooling her because school requires her to wear shoes -- I just have spent a lot of time finding the type of socks/shoes that work, and making sure she knows the expectation is that shoes and socks are worn to school, every day, it's non-negotiable, and she'll just have to make it work. In another example that directly affects the face -- young children are prescribed glasses all the time. For a young child to start wearing glasses, there's a big adjustment. Kids mess with them. They're uncomfortable at first. They're distracting. But again, in general, choosing not to wear them just isn't an option. We work with kids, we help them get used to them, we work through the frustration of reminding them not to mess with them.....and pretty soon kids get the hang of it. I really don't think a mask is much different.

Of course, I do think this thought process applies to MOST but not ALL children. Of course there are some children whose sensory issues, developmental challenges, physical abilities, or other things will make it not worth messing with trying to get them to wear a mask. Each parent will have to make that decision for themselves. But I do think that if we stop looking at a mask as this totally new thing and just consider it something like shoes or glasses, it seems a lot more reasonable. I just think it's really on parents to work with kids routinely on wearing masks so that by school time it isn't so foreign to them.

Also, when weighing the potential detriments to learning - consider also the detriments to learning from home. For some kids, wearing a mask will be so frustrating, and the kids handle learning from home so well (and go to a school that will likely do a solid job of providing good online instruction), that it's a better choice to keep the child home. For other kids, wearing a mask may be frustrating, and may even diminish from the learning experience a decent amount.....but if a diminished in-person experience will be better than a learn from home experience, then it's still worth it.

[carolinamama]

While there are definitely some kids who legitimately can not wear a mask (sensory, adhd, asd etc) I believe that most kids can be taught to wear one successfully. I'm not sure where your kids will fall, but it may be possible for them to adjust to a mask or face shield. I agree it's kinda like glasses or shoes. Remember when our toddlers took their shoes off every few minutes? But now I'm betting most of them don't think anything of mandatory shoes.

We have allowed DD to return to her gym after they changed some policies. It was either return or quit. They do not require gymnasts to mask, only coaches. No one else is enters. DH and I require DD to mask the entire time. She is 8 and has figured out how to wear a mask for 4 hours straight while running, flipping, swinging from the bars in a hot gym. She removes it for a few seconds to drink water. We practiced at home how to use hand sanitizer and then only touch the ear straps. Two other gymnasts in her group have started wearing a mask since DD returned, but others have also said they feel sorry for her having to wear one. It's likely a carry over from home and their parents' attitudes on the virus and masks. I'm more worried about both DSs wearing theirs this fall should they return to school. They are at ages where peer pressure factors more and neither are as secure in themselves as DD.

[Melaine]

If my 8 year old has to wear one for school we would choose a shield. I think he would be a lot more comfortable with that.

[bisous]

These are all good points. The only masks we have right now are homemade cloth. I think getting some better masks (I want face shields) and giving it some practice will help me make a better choice as Fall approaches. I’m really on the fence about in person classes with my littles next year for many reasons. There’s compelling reasons to go and to stay home but I might as well try to mitigate any potential downsides by practicing mask wearing!

[jgenie]

I would invest in face shields. They are way easier to wear. We purchased 4 kids masks from eBay for about $20. My youngest (who is the same age as your DD) has worn his mask on a few occasions. He has a bunch of issues (anxiety, OCD, and maybe ASD). My 10 year old with adhd wears his. Both boys are freaked out by covid and they refuse to go back to school unless masks are required.


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Would you mind linking to the shields you purchased?

[georgiegirl]

Would you mind linking to the shields you purchased?

These fit both my almost 7 year old and almost 11 year old (he’s small, like the size of a 9 year old). 4 masks for $22 shipped


https://www.ebay.com/itm/4-PCS-Children-Full-Face-Shield-Clear-Protective-Anti-Splash-School-Kindergarten/303600008961?pageci=81a19b0d-e49b-4faa-80a8-0c9c0496d6db

[mmsmom]

In my state masks are not required for children under 11. I’m not sure how they came up with that age as the cut off. My kids are older so they wear them and I definitely think they more they wear them the easier it becomes.

[dogmom]

I have kids wearing them to come into the hospital over the age of 2. It’s working fine. I got an 18 month old to wear one home the other day and she was a cranky butt! I think we have to remember how many things kids do in school we couldn’t get them to do at home. Nap on a mat on the floor? haha haha. Stand in line with a bunch of other kids? Stop talking when the teacher raises their hand? There are so many things kids do in school they don’t do at home and we just don’t think about it because it’s normal school stuff. Kids really don’t know any better. If it’s a clear expectations in school the vast majority of kids will be compliant with masks. I’ve see it in the city where mask wearing is more prevalent and the kids don’t even notice they be them on when they are running around.

[bisous]

I have kids wearing them to come into the hospital over the age of 2. It’s working fine. I got an 18 month old to wear one home the other day and she was a cranky butt! I think we have to remember how many things kids do in school we couldn’t get them to do at home. Nap on a mat on the floor? haha haha. Stand in line with a bunch of other kids? Stop talking when the teacher raises their hand? There are so many things kids do in school they don’t do at home and we just don’t think about it because it’s normal school stuff. Kids really don’t know any better. If it’s a clear expectations in school the vast majority of kids will be compliant with masks. I’ve see it in the city where mask wearing is more prevalent and the kids don’t even notice they be them on when they are running around.

I think part of my worry is that my kids are TERRIBLE about doing all these things even with teachers instructing them. Still, I’m going to try! But my kids are “those kids” who interrupt everyone at school and can’t keep their hands to themselves. We’re working on diagnoses and medication and well practice and I suppose we’ll see!

[essnce629]

In other Asian countries kids as young as two wear masks all the time without issue. It's just part of their culture, seen as normal (no parents are complaining), and the training starts super young. Kids in Japan as young as 5 wear masks at school all day every day during flu season. They also wear masks when pollen levels are high. When we were in Vietnam last summer everyone wore masks to protect from air pollution when riding on their Vespas and motorbikes (there's very little cars and even infants are carried on motorbikes)! Masks for all ages were sold on almost every corner. If little kids in other countries can wear masks without issues then so can kids in the US! Our kids are not delicate little flowers, they can and will adapt. Obviously its going to take lots of practice and encouragement. Same goes for teaching hand washing, potty training, putting shoes on, etc. Parents have to teach their kids these skills and it takes time and patience but eventually they learn. I have two friends with 2 year olds who are mask training at home. So far it's going well and they've been able to run short errands with their toddlers wearing their masks. Have "mask time" at home where everyone wears their masks for a certain amount of time and gradually increase the time, pretend you're super heroes and wear your masks, etc. Make it fun and keep practicing inside and outside of the house. DS1 is supposed to take the ACT in July (if it's not canceled for the 3rd time) and I plan on having him take a practice test with his mask on just so he gets used to it and to see if any issues come up during the 3 hour test related to the mask.

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[jgenie]

These fit both my almost 7 year old and almost 11 year old (he’s small, like the size of a 9 year old). 4 masks for $22 shipped


https://www.ebay.com/itm/4-PCS-Children-Full-Face-Shield-Clear-Protective-Anti-Splash-School-Kindergarten/303600008961?pageci=81a19b0d-e49b-4faa-80a8-0c9c0496d6db

Thank you!!

[niccig]

At the pediatric hospital I work at part-time, all patients except the toddlers wear masks. It’s going to take practice and reminders.


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[icunurse]

I have kids wearing them to come into the hospital over the age of 2. It’s working fine. I got an 18 month old to wear one home the other day and she was a cranky butt! I think we have to remember how many things kids do in school we couldn’t get them to do at home. Nap on a mat on the floor? haha haha. Stand in line with a bunch of other kids? Stop talking when the teacher raises their hand? There are so many things kids do in school they don’t do at home and we just don’t think about it because it’s normal school stuff. Kids really don’t know any better. If it’s a clear expectations in school the vast majority of kids will be compliant with masks. I’ve see it in the city where mask wearing is more prevalent and the kids don’t even notice they be them on when they are running around.

Exactly! People truly underestimate the caring and cooperation that kids can do when educated properly. My children have stopped eating peanut foods at lunch because someone had an allergy (they would check labels). They understood that someone had a sensory issue and knew not to yell around him. Kids do things to help others all the time. They can do this, too. It may not be 100% perfect, but 80% compliance is better than zero.

[niccig]

These are all good points. The only masks we have right now are homemade cloth. I think getting some better masks (I want face shields) and giving it some practice will help me make a better choice as Fall approaches. I’m really on the fence about in person classes with my littles next year for many reasons. There’s compelling reasons to go and to stay home but I might as well try to mitigate any potential downsides by practicing mask wearing!

Try the pediatric surgical masks. I prefer the adult surgical mask I wear at work over the cloth ones I wear at home. Cloth ones are hotter on hot days.


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[bisous]

Just bought face shields. I need to parse through all the mask threads and figure out options for all of us. There are so many choices now!

[georgiegirl]

Double post

[carolinacool]

Try the pediatric surgical masks. I prefer the adult surgical mask I wear at work over the cloth ones I wear at home. Cloth ones are hotter on hot days.


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Has anyone found these anywhere? I think these would be a better option for all-day wear as well. The Mama Seamstress are really the only reusable ones that fit DS' super well. But on top of everything else, the AC is wonky in DS' school and I think that mask would get HOT over the course of the school day. I had high hopes for the lighter, thinner Old Navy version, but those run a hair small on him. I wish they would introduce a tween version.

[acmom]

Has anyone found these anywhere? I think these would be a better option for all-day wear as well. The Mama Seamstress are really the only reusable ones that fit DS' super well. But on top of everything else, the AC is wonky in DS' school and I think that mask would get HOT over the course of the school day. I had high hopes for the lighter, thinner Old Navy version, but those run a hair small of him. I wish they would introduce a tween version.

I saw a tutorial on how to adjust a surgical mask to fit kids. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9NbxUpGPOno

[bisous]

Has anyone found these anywhere? I think these would be a better option for all-day wear as well. The Mama Seamstress are really the only reusable ones that fit DS' super well. But on top of everything else, the AC is wonky in DS' school and I think that mask would get HOT over the course of the school day. I had high hopes for the lighter, thinner Old Navy version, but those run a hair small of him. I wish they would introduce a tween version.

I found some and also ordered those....but I swear even though it was just hours ago it was cheaper than this:


https://www.amazon.com/50pcs-3layer-Disposable-Children-School/dp/B08BCR2LL8/ref=sr_1_1_sspa?dchild=1&keywords=kids+surgical+mask&qid=1593442330&sr=8-1-spons&psc=1&spLa=ZW5jcnlwdGVkUXVhbGlmaWVyPUEyRDdaQjBHNkNPWDA5J mVuY3J5cHRlZElkPUEwMjk2MTkyMVk5M0lGRkc2SjBKUiZlbmN yeXB0ZWRBZElkPUEwNjQxMTA4M1FWSE5VMDBLMkRCQiZ3aWRnZ XROYW1lPXNwX2F0ZiZhY3Rpb249Y2xpY2tSZWRpcmVjdCZkb05 vdExvZ0NsaWNrPXRydWU=

[California]

Bisous, it’s hard to say not knowing your kids’. By school age, I do think based on my experiences with kids that most can get used to wearing a mask. Kids, like adults, develop self-comforting habits that they do without thinking under stress. A small number of kids self-comfort by chewing or sucking on clothing, twisting a small part of their clothes, or constantly cleaning/adjusting glasses. It’s easy to imagine any kid with that habit chewing or twiddling with their mask, without even consciously thinking about it.

As far as sensory issues go, thinking of those on a scale, most kids with slight sensory issues who have adapted to wearing regular store bought clothes, socks, shoes, and jackets, have shown that they can handle some annoyance over clothing to be with their peers. A comfortable mask could be just one more annoying thing they have to do to be in the classroom. But for some kids, labels on clothing, blue jean fabric, seams inside clothes, the seam on socks- all those little things we ignore- can truly be overwhelming. For those kids a mask will be a real challenge.


ETA: side note- If you have masks that are too loose, check out Etsy for mask adjusters. I just got a little bag of clear adjusters that slip over the ear loop. Instantly solves the problems of too-big ear elastic for kids.

[gymnbomb]

Has anyone found these anywhere? I think these would be a better option for all-day wear as well. The Mama Seamstress are really the only reusable ones that fit DS' super well. But on top of everything else, the AC is wonky in DS' school and I think that mask would get HOT over the course of the school day. I had high hopes for the lighter, thinner Old Navy version, but those run a hair small of him. I wish they would introduce a tween version.

I found a 50 pack of them on Amazon a few days ago for about $15. They weren’t the blue ones, they had dinosaurs on them, but same style/shape.


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