How to help guide DD in choosing her swimsuit & clothes
My words are failing me as of late, so maybe y'all can help! DD, age 13, has been picking out most of her own clothes for a couple years now. We mostly order online, and have gotten a bunch of hand-me-downs from a family friend that she has been happy with. But, this year, she wants to branch out and we are butting heads on what is and is not appropriate. The latest battle is swimsuits. She wants bikinis, which are not an automatic no in my book, but some of what is popular this year is strappy, peek-a-boo, lots of strings, and (IMO) looks a lot like skimpy lingerie. She, of course, doesn't see anything wrong with it, while I struggle to gently explain to her that some of her choices just aren't appropriate at her age. She is not prepared for the attention that wearing it would attract. I'm having a hard time coming up with how to balance the want for what is trendy and popular with a need for a level of modesty. (To be clear, I am not trying to restrict her to full cut/athletic/mom styles.)
How do I word this? Maybe I should back off? Any advice is much appreciated!
How to help guide DD in choosing her swimsuit & clothes
Ugggh posted before I was done - continuing here.
This year the styles have changed even more - hard to find anything that fits the rules so we've bent a little. There's still a "mom's best judgment" clause. We are pretty open about "that's too old for you" offset by "if everyone else is wearing it maybe I'm making too big of a deal ". Tie back instead of hook - allowed. String sides in model called "cheeky" that too much tush showed? Not allowed.
I get the "not able to handle attention". While DD is 12, she's a full B cup and can pass for 15. Its a fine line but I'm trying to bend toward "if she's appropriately covered, it's on others to behave correctly."
We were on a cruise for spring break and then a waterpark at Disney. Other than when she rode a gondola with two late teen boys (?) there was no attention - and even the boys were just talking to her/maybe lightly flirting, not being at all inappropriate, from what was reported. (I was on gondola behind her.)
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
How to help guide DD in choosing her swimsuit & clothes
There are tons of bikinis at Macy's (and Athleta, Title Nine...) that have more of a crop top so just the midriff is exposed. I saw more of those this year than the full tankini I was looking for. Could be a compromise.
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk