4am wake up - How to STOP IT!!!

So dd2 (12 months) has for the past 4-5 weeks been waking every morning between 4:00am and 4:30am. I need it to stop!!!
I refuse to get her at 4am and so she just cries... and cries in her crib until we do get her.
Our ped at the 12 month visit said we need to sleep train for the morning, but how do we do that?
I have been waiting until 5am to get her because by then she has woken dd1leaving me with very sleep deprived kids.

DD1 has never been a late sleeper and will wake on her own between 5:30-6am so I've been ok with that, but 4am will just not fly!

What time does she go to bed, and how long are her naps - i.e., how long is she sleeping overall? I *just* this morning (at 4:45 am, lol) read the Ferber chapter on various sleep issues including "in the bed/crib too long" b/c my DS (16 mos) has been waking in the middle of the night and staying awake for 2-3 hours before settling back down - while he doesn't really complain or cry, just seems to be trying to get back to sleep by singing, rocking, playing the music thing that's in his crib, etc., it is totally disruptive for him and me (the bedrooms are only separated by a small landing and even w/the monitor off I can hear everything). Ferber says it's common for parents to think babies need more sleep than they really do (for the 12-18 mo range the average sleep requirement is 11-12 hours total, including naps) and it can cause either struggles at bedtime, or too early wakings, or middle of the night wakings. So I'm guessing this is our issue, since DS typically has a 2-3 hour nap and then I was putting him down at around 7:30 and he was sleeping until around 7-7:30 - so he's been in the crib around 14-15 hours. Confusing matters though is that I night weaned him last week, but since he doesn't seem to be looking to be fed overnight anymore, I don't think this is causing the awake time - it's like he's really trying to go back to sleep but just can't. Anyway, just throwing this out there, may be worth looking into - GL!

She is asleep around 7pm, but doesn't take great naps. She just started daycare 2 weeks ago (was waking before she started) and is only getting a 1 hour nap most days - her doing not theirs.
So right now she's averaging about 10 hours of sleep in a 24 hour period.
I always hear people say their kids can stay in their cribs and babble, play, etc but general seem happy. This is not the case. She cries and cries and cries until we get her. I have a few soft toys in there but she just throws them out of the crib.

It almost seems as if she is hungry. I nurse her in the morning and before bed. I usually don't get her out of the crib until 4:30 at the earliest and nurse as soon as I pick her up. She nurses for a while so I'm not sure if she's starving, sad, looking for comfort etc.
My goal was to wean all nursing sessions by 13 months, but right now that's not happening.

My DS1 was like that. I know people say that sleep begets sleep, but that wasn't the case for us. He didn't stop the 4 am wake up until I moved his bedtime up a little later. But, he was also a good napper, so that's different than your DD.

Then again, don't listen to me. I'm sleep deprived with DS2 at the moment and working on sleep training.

Both my kids are early-risers--esp. J. At 12 months, he was waking up ready to go at 4 am. Here are a few things that have helped us at different points, but I also think he is just kind of a morning person:
-we have a cool mobile in the crib, with music and projecting lights. Turning that thing on usually bought us another 15-20 minutes of quiet.
-once our kids were about 12 months or so, we sometimes gave them little snack traps with plain Cheerios to munch on in their crib when they first woke up. For DD especially, this has been great. It keeps her happy and entertained for a while longer and takes the edge off any hunger first thing in the morning.
-*some* kids (not either of mine) do well if you bring them into bed with you when they wake up extra early. Mine were always too wiggly and awake to settle down and snuggle, but I hear that some kids do that ;-)

Hope these help a little!

When my girls woke at that hour, I always just brought them to bed with us. They'd snuggle up and go back to sleep. It didn't cause long term "issues" and it wasn't necessary anymore when the girls started sleeping later.