Originally Posted by
dogmom
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I agree that was not a good therapist for your child, and may not have been a good therapist for any child. However, the OP is questioning whether the confidentiality concept is normal at the beginning before even starting therapy (if I understand correctly).
To the OP: Look there are parents who don’t believe their child should keep anything from them. That’s not how I’m raising my kids, but that’s your decision and I won’t debate the pros and cons here. If you honestly just taken aback by it and didn’t realize that’s how it works usually, the answer is it is. I might be reading into it, but you also seem to be on the fence about this whole therapy thing by how you describe the severity of your child's anxiety. I would encourage you to go to one meeting, see how your child likes the therapist, but try not to transmit your unease. (Kids are so good at picking up that, especially anxious ones.) Afterwards use the 10 minutes with your son to talk about your concerns about you know some things are private, but you want to understand how you can help if you don’t know the strategies. I’m sure the therapist will help you. If not, then the fits not good. I would say to discuss it with your child present so they understand the ground rules.
As someone with an anxious kid I know it seems like you need to know WHAT is making them anxious, but that matters much less than what to do about it. You can address the situations that trigger anxiety, but it is wack-a-mole, something else will replace it. I have found when it’s important for me to know a therapist tells me. My issue with therapist tend to be they either aren’t clicking with my kid or the ones that pushed a narrative that didn’t feel right to me. But I never felt like anyone would tell not me what I needed to know.