How do you get your kids motivated to do well in school?
Dd2 is not motivated to do well in school. It is driving me bonkers as she is smart, but she just doesn’t care much about getting a good grade or applying her knowledge to her school work. She just wants to be done with school work as quickly as it is assigned and put the least amount of effort in to it, and doesn’t care that it is wrong. She is only in the 4th grade so I know it isn’t the end of the world, and dealing with distance learning isn’t ideal for her, but I just feel like there is nothing I can do to make her realize that school and grades are important. She was happy she only missed 4 of the 9 questions on her religion test this morning and getting her to study is worse than pulling teeth.
She is on medication for ADHD (inattentive), and the last televisit we had with the new developmental pediatrician was less than effective so I don’t want to schedule another one until she can be seen in person.
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How do you get your kids motivated to do well in school?
Consequences? Like no screen time or whatever will have an impact? It wouldn’t be my first line of action but it’d be in my arsenal. I’m a big believer in doing your best so I’ve been frustrated at times when my kids didn’t care as much. Ds2 still grumbles about not caring but I know he’s proud of his straight As.
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How do you get your kids motivated to do well in school?
No ADHD here but DS has never been motivated with school work or grades. Get it done and go do something else. A little more effort would bump his grades up as often he got a 79 or an 89 in a class. Seriously drove DH and I nuts, as that’s not how we were at school. We worked with a behavior specialist when he was first diagnosed with his pain condition, and she told us the motivation has to come from them. Some kids it takes a while and for some it may not be until they’re out of school. We could pressure him to do better, but the cost would be our relationship with him. We saw that happen with close friends whose older son had similar attitude to DS. Making DS care more would’ve been a huge battle, increased stress and increased the pain flares.
The last 2 years we’ve backed off, I did continue to help with scheduling as he had trouble with that, but the quality of the work was up to him. We had a year when he was frequently absent due to pain flares, so our goals for freshman year was for him to attend school, then the sophomore year goal was to attend school and submit work on time. This year he started to care more, he’s had no late work, and is talking about his grades and college. I do nothing unless he asks for help.He’s a sophomore, it may be too late and his gpa may not be high enough for the college he says he wants. That’s a lesson there that he has to learn. He will still go to college and will graduate and get a job etc. It’s been difficult for DH and I to let it go. DS is not us, and we can’t make him be motivated. He is though starting to show it himself
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