Another MIL rant

[mharling]

MIL has multiple health issues, including diabetes. On top of it, she's a very heavy smoker. Well, she went into the hospital Thursday (dh calls her hospital visits 'semi-annual tune-ups') and was put into the ICU. The first doctor she saw was shocked at the number of medications she has (I couldn't even venture to guess how many there are!) and was appalled that in spite of everything, she continues to smoke. Apparently, she was very close to death.

Her health has gotten to the point that it's not just affecting her, but the rest of the family as well. FIL has prostate cancer and is certainly in no position to have her super-dependent on him. SIL had to take 2 days off of work last week to help FIL get her to the hospital and stick around to talk to the doctors. Dh and I provide financial support for all the medication. Etc, etc, etc....

We were supposed to have dh's family over here Saturday for a cookout to celebrate Mother's Day. Needless to say, it was cancelled. And the sad part is I didn't feel bad for her at all that she missed her Mother's Day celebration.

What upsets me most about this is that nothing will serve as a wake-up call to her to take charge of her health. She is very comfortable in the 'woe is me' role and I think she's too lazy/unmovitated to do anything about it.

I would have hoped that having a wonderful, beautiful new grandson would have kicked her into action, but surprise, surprise, it has not. I think that is incredibly sad.

That's my rant!!! Thanks for letting me share.

Mary
Mommy to Lane Michael 4/6/03
http://www.shutterfly.com/osi.jsp?i=...21b33928e40550

[gravymommy3]

Mary,

Not to be a buttinski, but... if it were my MIL and my newborn, I would forbide contact between her and the baby until she quits smoking. Even if she does not smoke around him, particles of smoking junk are still on her person. I would not want that around my child. My mother (who quit smoking 20+ years ago) use to have to go to the hospital for "tune-ups." She was motivated but her health was not willing! It just stinks to see someone throw away (and drain those around them) their health.

Sorry you have to go through this.

[MartiesMom2B]

Mary:

I know exactly how you feel. MIL used to be "killing" herself with her weight. She did get the gastric bypass done, and instead of woe is me my knees are about to give out to the grand pooba of weight loss and health.

How does she feel about her grandchildren? MIL decided to have surgery and improve her health so she could be around to see them grow up. Maybe your MIL might find motivation in that. I agree w/ Amy though about the no smoking.

HTH

Sonia
Proud Mommy to Martie 4/6/03
http://www.mcdyer.com/MartieSurasky.htm