grab bag hum bug...i get scr#wed almost every year!

[chiqanita]

I hate griping about this but it's the only way I'm going to get it off of my chest!

For the past 15 years we've been doing a $50 grab bag in my family, includes parents and all adults...about 9 of us. All children get a gift from adults. I dont' know how it happens but about 75% of the time bil's wife usually draws my name. She's super nice and a good mama but not a good gift giver. We're all told to send our wish/idea lists to the gift giver. I send her my list each time. Each time she has drawn me she has ignored my wish/idea list. Over the years she has given me the following:

1. Mary Kay hand lotion
2. Lands End slippers
3. Mary Kay relaxation lotion
4. Bath & Body antibacterial lotion
5. Potpourri basket
6. scented candles
7. sweater with a hole in it
8. 2 turtle necks not my size

I usually give ideas like: specific types of books and authors, music cds, dvd sets, colognes, exercise stuff.
I also list my favorite stores. We don't live in the same state and she always buys me stuff from stores that are NOT in my area. Once I just had to return an item to her to exchange. She said there were no other items like it so she sent me a check...the only year I actually got the total $50.

It doesn't happen with anyone else in the family including her husband my bil. That was long. Thanks for listening. BTW, this year she drew my name and guess what I got...?! NOTHING! x( She forgot. I haven't said a word.

[maestramommy]

Very odd, since you say she is super nice. The list almost sounds like she is giving you free gifts, like regifting or something. With the list you give her it would seem to be so easy picking out a gift that's $50 or less.

[saschalicks]

Wow she's a winner. Nice or not, not bringing your gift is just not right. Who hosts the party? Maybe, the host can put a blanket statement out to all others that they need to really consider the person's list. I'm so sorry that really does suck.

[elliput]

Maybe who ever is in charge of the grab bag name pulling needs to instate a rule that if you gifted someone in the past 8 years you get a new name? Basically, no duplicates until everyone has gifted AND received from everyone else.

[kakohler]

Somehow I've been designated the person in charge of the name drawing in my family. The way I handle it is this:
I use Excel to generate random numbers between 1 and 100 for each person. Everyone then sends me a number between 1 and 100. The number you send me is matched to the closest number generated and that associated person. Sometimes I have to tweak it a little so no one is constantly giving to or getting from the same person every year. no complaints so far, mainly because no one else wants to be in charge!

[BaileyBea]

Ohhh that's a huge bummer! I can't believe she actually forgot. Maybe you can remind her next time you talk etc.. or have your DH tell her or your BIL.

That royally stinks!

I hope she feels bad and sends you a nice gift certificate or $$.

Nancy

[Momof3Labs]

That's our rule, though our family is small so we just say that you can't give to the same person two years in a row. Perhaps if she gets your name next year, just give some different gift card suggestions to her? ((Though honestly it sounds to me like she might be doing some regifting - which is fine IMO if the gift suits the recipient well, but not just to dump something on them.))