I feel uncomfortable about this...probably just need to vent.

[gatorsmom]

I guess I just need to vent about this. We found a nanny to take care of our 4 year old and 2 year old. And she's great. She's got 2 older kids of her own, a 20 year old and 17 year old. So she is pretty understanding and has lots of BTDT experience. The boys love her and she's donea a nice job so far. The whole purpose of having her is so that I can rest when I need to. Usually I try to get stuff done in the morning and rest in the afternoon. But lately I"m finding I need to rest in the morning too.

So, I find myself wide awake but physically exhausted. That usually puts me in my bed with my laptop and other projects spread out all over. Here's my issue, I feel like a pampered princess and I'm not comfortable with that. The nanny comes in occasionally to ask questions or the boys come in and want to talk and there I am, laying there on my pile of pillows looking pampered and spoiled. I'd lounge on the sofa but I don't want to get in the nanny's way.

So, I'm uncomfortable about her judging me. Isn't that stupid? I know we are well off and I"m very lucky. And my husband spoils me with any material thing I want (I think he feels guilty about being gone working on his many projects so much). But frankly, I'm uncomfortable with potentially being judged this way. I grew up in a blue-collar working family and have worked all my life. I feel best when I'm busy and accomplishing something. This just isn't me.

The nanny has only been supportive and encourages me to rest pretty often. So this is probably all in my head. And it probably stems from my personal insecurities. I just can't help it. And it's a very uncomfortable feeling. God, I wish my mom were here. And I can't wait for these babies to be born already!!!!

Lisa
Mom to Gator July 2003
And Cha-Cha July 2005
and surprise! twins due 11/07!

[nov04]

You are busy and accomlishing something. You're keeping those babies safe and healthy. Keep telling yourself your work is very tough and only you can do this for them.

all the best.

[LarsMal]

I completely agree with Jos. Your body is working SO hard right now. November will be here before you know it and then you'll really be wishing you had taken advantage of your opportunity to rest.

Are there games or anything you can do in bed with your boys? Or, if you really feel like you need to be *doing* something, have the nanny bring you laundry to fold- something like that.

I say just rest, though, you deserve it!

[tarabenet]

YOU are the person who is judging you. Why would the nanny judge? Whatever the reason (and yours are good ones), she has a job. And by the way, you are doing a pretty darned important job too, growing two babies and all that.

If you flat can't take it, then work on something you judge at least somewhat "useful" that makes minimal physical demands. Do you have any hobbies? Maybe this is the time for some minor scrapbooking? Sort the old photos? I don't know -- just make sure you choose something that won't be a drain and that you will feel good about accomplishing. How 'bout working in plenty of snuggling and reading with the kids when they are in quieter moods? And don't worry about it and don't judge if you don't find enough energy to complete whatever sort of project you have come up with.

And keep repeating to yourself "I am doing an important job!"

[deenass]

The last month of both pregnancies I got VERY little accomplished - when I told my husband that I wasn't particularly "productive" on a specific day, he told me that I was very busy being REPRODUCTIVE.

Go easy on yourself - you will be PLENTY busy soon enough!

[maestramommy]

I understand how you feel. It's a little like how I feel sometimes when the cleaning lady comes. We never had one growing up, and it feels a little like an indulgence. But hey, this woman is very nice and obliging, and she has another gig because of me. And no agency to skim off the top of her fee either.

As if you're not doing anything? Honey, you're growing TWO BABIES. I'd say your nanny is serious when she encourages you to rest. She's BTDT and probably understands that twins are extra hard on the body.

[Melanie]

You're Gestating, and probably enormously pregnant. ;) That's accomplishing lots. She is there so you can rest. That's her job. Now do yours!

[table4three]

If you weren't pregnant and were just an otherwise completely healthy non-pregnant woman lounging all day, sure. But, you are pregnant! WITH TWINS!!! I'm sure she understands! Hang in there!

DS - 2
DD - coming this summer!