Missed DD's first school trip b/c of her teacher

[npace19147]

I am so po'd right now, I can hardly stand it. My oldest daughter is in preschool and her first big school trip to the art museum was this morning. I really wanted to go with her, but her teacher said no younger siblings could come and good luck finding a sitter for a Wednesday morning. I asked a couple of times and she said I couldn't bring the baby, even sent an email last night saying no sibs b/c the focus should be on the older kids. I was disappointed, but I understood.

FF to this morning...older kid had about five temper tantrums on our way out the door, I hadn't showered, threw on clothes, of course we were the last ones to arrive. My car is out front with the flashers on, baby in arm, kid holding on to other hand. As I come in, the teacher says to me (kind of apologetically) "You can stay if you like."

WTF!????! I have asked so many times over the last two weeks, and NOW you tell me I can stay? When I have no stroller, no diaper bag, not so much as a single diaper for a seven month old and my car out front with the flashers on?!?! And of course she says this where DD1 can hear her, so now I'm disappointing her too.

I think some other moms just went ahead and brought their younger kids, so the teacher felt like she had to tell me it was ok too. So I listened to the initial instructions and I had to miss my kids trip, while other parents just blithely did what they wanted and got to go. Why am I always the schmuck who follows instructions? So now I missed my little girl's first school trip.

OK, sorry this turned into a novel, but just had to vent. :(

[nov04]

What a jerk. I would be quite disappointed that sibs weren't welcome. If she was going to be so difficult about it, she should have stood her ground.

[LD92599]

I missed ours this morning too! Got to school, pouring rain, so i figured i wouldn't use a 1/2 day to go to a soggy, muddy pumpkin patch. Wouldn't you know i got to work and it stopped raining and the sun was out? Granted i'm sure the PP is still soggy and muddy, but still :-(

Poo on the teacher!

Laura
Mom to Will

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[masha12]

You did the right thing. If younger siblings were not allowed, then the other moms were in the wrong.

I understand the teacher's perspective on no siblings. It is hard enough to manage "x" number of children, but if you allow moms to come with siblings, it increases the chaos exponentially. I suspect some moms just ignored the rules and showed up with other kids. As as the teacher, she was in a tough spot. She probably needed the chaperones and was stuck.

I'm sorry you didn't get to go, but you did the right thing by following the rules and set a good example for your daughter.

One of the most important lessons for children to learn is that we don't always get what we want and that while we don't have to agree with the rules, we have to follow them (or work to change them in an orderly fashion).

[firstbaby]

I would be PO'd at the other parents who didn't follow instructions and counted on putting the teacher in a no win situation. She was staying consistent with a school policy of no siblings and then the other parents didn't follow it. If you had noticed other parents were bringing their younger children and the teacher said nothing to you this morning that you could come, that would be especially crappy. But I think there was no way the teacher could have won here. Of course, she could have been more proactive in advertising the no siblings rule.

Hopefully for the next field trip, you will have enough advance notice to find a sitter and go with your daughter. I'm sure the school will do a better job of advertising the rules for the next trip.

[npace19147]

Thank you, this was very helpful. The teacher was also very apologetic when I picked my daughter up. DD had a great time (probably a better time than if I had been there - she can be very clingy and melty with me).

It also sounded like the mom with the baby had a lot of trouble juggling the two - baby was unhappy, kid was acting out. So, all worked out in the end.

[deborah_r]

>I think some other moms just went ahead and brought their
>younger kids, so the teacher felt like she had to tell me it
>was ok too. So I listened to the initial instructions and I
>had to miss my kids trip, while other parents just blithely
>did what they wanted and got to go. Why am I always the
>schmuck who follows instructions?


I'm starting to learn that this is the way it often goes. Our school doesn't have too many evening events where they don't offer childcare, but there are some. At the last one, I would have been PO'd if I had gotten a babysitter because so many parents brought their kids! One of the other moms was complaining to me about it because she had made special arrangements for her kids so that both she and her DH could attend. (We both attended too, but my MIL happened to be staying with us, so it didn't put us out too much)