Many families in my area will be trick-or-treating on Sat- WWYD?

[cdlamis]

I hope I don't offend anyone with this post but I am really unsure of what to do. I am a very open and accepting person when it comes to religion, race, etc. DH even calls me Mrs. Social Worker because I try so hard to accept/love all groups. But this one has me baffled.

The city where we live is predominantly (or seems to be) one major religion that has chosen to trick-or-treat this year on Saturday. The rest of the families will go on Sunday like scheduled. A majority of my specific neighborhood/street is of this faith and will be trick-or-treating on Saturday.

My questions are : Do we offer candy on Saturday AND Sunday? Do we still let Julia TOT on Sunday- how will we know who isn't passing out candy? I don't want to offend my neighbors but I also don't want them to decide for us when we will TOT or celebrate Halloween.

To be completely honest (and I almost erased this part because I DO NOT want to offend), but I am a little frustrated that a single group can change the way a entire community celebrates. If you choose not to TOT on Sunday or do something with your church on Saturday, that's great! I totally accpet that. BUT I don't want to feel pressure to change my own views. I just don't see anything wrong with trick-or-treating on a Sunday.

Any suggestions? TIA~

Daniella
Mom to Julia 6-13-02
And another little girl EDD 12-30-04!!

[american_mama]

I would pass out candy on both nights. In theory, your total outlay will be the same just divided into two nights. Also, many years ago I had a friend in Columbus, Ohio who said the city or neighborhood had somehow decided trick or treating would be on a certain night for some kind of safety reason. Although your situation might be different, it isn't unheard of for a community to change Halloween (shocked me too) for a variety of reasons.

[calebsmama03]

That's a tough one! Was there a specific reason behind the Saturday choice? For me, I'd have the treats available and if I was planning to be home that day I'd pass them out, but I wouldn't change my plans to be around that day. If there isn't going to be anyone TOTing on Sunday, then it might just be best to go with the flow on it. A few years back the town I lived in did a similar thing as to which day TOTing was "allowed" (trying to keep it off a school night), it didn't fly so it went back to the 31st but there are specific times.

Sorry, no real help there.
Lynne
Mommy to Caleb 3/3/03
http://www.gynosaur.com/assets/ribbons/ribbon_emerald_18m.gif[/img][/url]
Oh my!! #2 5/05

[lisams]

I know exactly what you're talking about and we will not be handing out candy on Sat - we will be celebrating Halloween on Sun. It would be one thing if it was a town decision, but this is not (this same group changed fireworks at a major venue to be on a Sat. the 3rd when the Fourth was on Sunday and caused a huge uproar a few years back- angered a lot of Veterans) . I would TOT on Sunday - do you have family that lives somewhat near, you could TOT in their neighborhood instead? That's what we're doing.

My opinion is that this religious group should do a church thing on Sat. We live in a very diverse state where all religions are represented, it's just a few towns that are heavily one particular religion. I grew up feeling like an outcast in high school because I wasn't one of them so my feelings probably stem from this.

I'm sorry this is upsetting, but I also totally understand your feelings.

Lisa

[Marisa6826]

When I lived in Hoboken, the holidays were NEVER on the actual calendar date. Go figure. That town was always in its own time warp anyway ;) .

If a child is a Conservative Jew, they wouldn't be allowed to TOT if a Halloween fell on a Saturday (until after dark). Then again, I don't know that they'd be allowed to eat candy unless it was Kosher ( I have NO clue as to whether or not your run of the mill candy meets Kosher requirements).

Have you talked to your neighbours to see what they plan to do?

On one hand, you can practice tolerance and put candy out both days. On the other, you can stand by your convictions and only distribute on Sunday. The third option is to go to the mall both days and just say screw it ;).

Let us know what you decide.

hugs

-m

[ellies mom]

I was raised Mormon in a very non-mormon area. I remember feeling so bummed when Halloween fell on Sunday because we couldn't go out trick-or-treating. It's the whole keep the Sabbath holy thing. Although I think my parents did pass out candy. The church would always have a costume party on Friday or Saturday, but as a kid it simply wasn't the same. So, speaking as a formally disapointed child, it would be nice if you gave out candy on Saturday.

That said take your child out on Sunday. I'm sure the same rules apply, no porch light-no candy. I think your daughter is young enough to not really notice and it won't happen on Sunday for several more years. If she was older and therefore really into candy she could go when she'd get more bang for her buck.

I'm not by any stretch of the imagination offended, but I'm not sure the single group is changing how the community celebrates the holiday, they are just celebrating it in a way that fits their belief. You and the rest of the community can still celebrate it how you want. If you don't want to give out candy on Saturday, don't. I'm sure they'll understand.

[brubeck]

Actually it is my understanding that conservative Jews don't even celebrate Halloween.

[murpheyblue]

I would probably give out candy both days but I do think it is rude for people to TOT on Saturday. The whole idea of TOTing is a little weird - going from door to door and asking for treats BUT it is socially acceptable and indeed encouraged one day a year. Not one day unless that day is inconveneient for you so then you can do it another day. I think it's an imposition on the neighborhood for a group to TOT on a seperate day. That's like I get invited to a BBQ on a Friday during Lent. My personal beliefs involve not eating meat on Fridays so I show up on Satuday instead.

If a group doesn't want to TOT on Sunday they should set up an activity for the kids to have fun on Saturday that does not compel (but could invite) involvement from the rest of the town, e.g. a festival. I understand some kids may feel disappointed but that's one of the burdens of faith, sometimes it's not conveneient.

[Kieransmom]

Wow...what a situation. I would be as confused as you and I am no help with offering advice here. I'm just sorry that the fun has been taken out of the day and it becomes more of a stress to you. I hope that whatever you decide that you and your kids have a great time. :-)

[Momof3Labs]

Our community always sets TOT on a weekend afternoon - this year it is Oct 31 from 1-4pm, but some years it is a few days before Halloween! I thought it was weird at first, but it is a safety thing - have the kids out during daylight hours.