Should I move?

[mommy_someday]

We live directly across the street from DH's sister, her DH and their two kiddos. We LOVE it! It comes in so handy for several reasons.

1) Instant babysitter for emergencies (like when I have to go to work, but DH is stuck in traffic unexpectedly)

2) If you run out of something when you're cooking, you can share. They always borrow eggs from us and we've been known to get salsa and milk. :)

3) We keep an eye on each other's things. We've both left our garage doors open and we just run across the street and close it for each other in that case. Also, if one family is out of town, the other takes care of their animals so no one has to shell out $$ for a kennel.

4) We frequently invite each other over when we've rented a movie or when we try out new recipies that make more food than we expected.

5) The DHs share tools. SIL's DH has a lot of woodworking tools that DH likes to borrow, and they borrow all kinds of things from us like levels, drill bits, etc. We have a nice lawnmower and they have space in their shed, so we share that too. (Our garage is waaaay full!)

6) It's nice for people who are shy, like me, to already know their neighbors.

Good luck on your decision!

[mommy_someday]

Oops, sorry!

[jesseandgrace]

I keep thinking about this post, and I am so jealous! I wish I had a situation like this, even if it made finances tight. If we couldn't afford it I wouldn't do it, but i would do it if we could afford it, even if it meant things were tight. I really think it sounds like this is a supportive, close family and it really would be ideal to live right there. The kids could play together, there is always support and babysitting. That would be ideal for me.

[1ceng1]

I was at my parents' house today and saw the realtor outside. He was able to show me the house immediately. It was strange, b/c I used to babysit the owner's kids there when I was 12 and it was so familiar to me--in other words, not much has changed in 18 years. However, it was in better condition than I thought and needs cheap improvements (paint, new carpeting), but also the master Bath needs to be gutted and the kitchen needs a facelift in a few years. (I should mention we were going to do a major remodel our own kitchen in the coming months to make it larger the kitchen in this other house has plenty of room). Anyway, I liked it more than I had expected but decided on a "wait a see" approach. I can't afford asking price and the realtor said the homeowners were actually expecting a higher appraisal than he gave them, so I assume talking them down to what I can afford will not be acceptable to them.
So, maybe I'll get lucky and the house will sit and they will lower the price. I doubt it, but you never know.
Thank you for all your advice! If anyone has any opinions on this, I would still love to hear it. My sister is begging me to buy this house, so this will be an ongoing saga.

[firsttimemommy]

If its in the upper realm of what she can afford COMFORTABLY than I'm assuming it's still relatively comfortable, right? I was kind of going off that. Of course none of us can tell her definitely YES or NO - only she knows for sure. I see us as just helping her think out loud.

As far as betting on future income, sometimes IMHO, it is ok - I make no money now, in 2 years I will go back to work teaching (no problem getting a job around here doing that) and that's a large increase in our income. It's a pretty safe bet for ME, for US for OUR family. Now, could something happen that might change that, sure. But the odds are slim, really. It's ALWAYS a gamble. Heck even buying what what you can afford today is a gamble b/c one family member could lose their job tomorrow.

FWIW, when I got pregnant, I put college savings in our budget. I kinda thought that came along with buying a crib, stroller, etc. - it's a given. But maybe for some it isn't, who knows.

Anyway, just my opinion.

Ronda
Proud Mommy to 2 adorable munchkins - 1/03 and 4/04

"Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes........that way you are a mile away and you have their shoes."

[firsttimemommy]

Well, it will all work out the way it is supposed to, I'm a firm believer in that.

I noticed that you are now saying that you couldn't talk them down to a price you could afford - originally you said it was affordable, just in your upper realm, but if the price is too high now, then I think you answered your own question :)

Best of luck to you!!!!!

Ronda
Proud Mommy to 2 adorable munchkins - 1/03 and 4/04

"Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes........that way you are a mile away and you have their shoes."

[1ceng1]

Sorry, I meant that if it were reduced a bit (even less than 10%) I would be comfortable with making an offer and the mortgage would be acceptable to me. It is doable at the price it is set at...just not comfortable enough for me to live with, let alone be involved in a bidding war driving the price up even more.

Thanks!

[SweetTooth]

Christine,
When I first read your initial post, I was excited for you at the possibility of living so close to family. Of course, like PPs have said, finances should be closely examined and considered in the decision. I personally don't think driving to the park, etc. or a 15 minute commute from work is bad, but that's b/c we need to drive to most places & live in an area with bad traffic. I think living close to family is a very unique opportunity. I know that some people would not want to live close to their relatives, but it sounds like you would enjoy living close to your mother and sister. I live 15 mins from my mother & love it. It's kind of like the "it take a village to raise a child" philosophy. Of course, if it straps you financially, then the stress of that may not be worth it. Good luck with your decision.

[mapg]

I live down the street from my sister, and depending on the day, it is really nice. If I didn't have kids, I would never do it. But to have your mom and dad right there, wow. I'd love to live next door to my parents. My life would be so easy. How will your husband handle all this family. My husband's family is not that close-- he thinks they are, but if you only communicate by phone once every few months... He knows their proximity has allowed him to do the stuff he loves and not really be inconvenienced by having children, but he hates the constant flow of relations. If you think you can handle it, and he won't suffocate, I think your life will be easier and your children's life will be easier. When I was listing people authorized to pick up my child on pre-school forms, I ran out of space. I've never had to pay for a baby-sitter. or take a well kid to the doctor's office along with a sick kid. We were on our way to the doctor's office and DD threw up as we were on the way out, we were late so I had to leave it. There I was sitting at the office, pregnant, with one very sick kiddo, dreading the mess that awaited me. When I got home, my sister had cleaned it up, and had cleaned my messy kitchen, folded a load of towels, and done a walk through to pick up toys, and taken clothes home to iron. Pretty nice.
MA

[olim]

I would do it. Your kids will develop a close relationship with your parents and who can put a price on that? Plus if money gets tight you could go to work and let your parents watch the kids (if they are willing and it sounds like they would be).
SAHM to Madeline Penelope Jan. 9 2004