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  1. #21
    Saartje is offline Sapphire level (2000+ posts)
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    Mar 2004
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    Chicago, IL.
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    Default RE: Does anyone do adoption as a first choice?

    Ah, *at least* 30! I misread that as "no older than 30," and I've heard China discourages older parents from adopting infants, so I was a bit concerned. Thanks — that fits perfectly into our plans, since we're currently in our mid-20s and will probably have one more biological child in about 3 years' time (and adopt after that).

  2. #22
    Join Date
    May 2005
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    Default Mia's avatar!!!

    OMG, what an adorable pic!!!

  3. #23
    Join Date
    Feb 2002
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    The Triangle, North Carolina
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    6,498

    Default Thanks for the link Holli

    Thanks for the link Holli. I bookmarked it. :)
    -Melissa
    Mom to M (2002) & M (2014)

  4. #24
    Momof3Labs is offline Pink Diamond level (15,000+ posts)
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    Jun 2002
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    Default RE: Does anyone do adoption as a first choice?

    We've always planned to adopt down the road, after we've had a couple of bio children. And that was before we knew how hard it would be to have a second (DS' conception required some medical assistance, but not much). I can see waiting about 5 years after our last bio child is born, then adopting a 2-4 or so year old, so they still end up fairly close in age.

    I'm sure that people will think that we are nuts, but then they also think that we are out of our mind for continuing to adopt dogs that are at least 10 years old. My point is that you learn to smile and nod at the strong, contrary opinions because you know that you are doing what is right for your family!
    Single mom to

    DS ("twice exceptional") - September 2002
    DS - February 2006
    DD - July 2009
    DD - July 2009

  5. #25
    kathleen a. Guest

    Default RE: Does anyone do adoption as a first choice?

    No offense but it sounds like your friends are the weirdos...NOT YOU! Encourage them to have an open mind and explain why you are choosing this for you and your family. If they still think you are weird for doing this, you may not want them around, adoption is a VERY emotional and HARD journey to take. Your gonna STRONG support from your friends as well as your family.

    Here's Hoping!

    And best of luck to you and your family!

    kathleen

  6. #26
    kijip is offline Pink Diamond level (15,000+ posts)
    Join Date
    Feb 2004
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    18,572

    Default Great Link Holli, but 1 question...

    All of the positive and negative terms made 100% sense to me except this one:

    Permission to sign a release (Positive) Disclosure (Negative)

    I guess I am curious as to what context "disclosure" is a negative term. I can't even figure out which part of adoption this refers to. Can someone educate me?

    Katie, mama to a pair of boys.

  7. #27
    kijip is offline Pink Diamond level (15,000+ posts)
    Join Date
    Feb 2004
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    18,572

    Default RE: Does anyone do adoption as a first choice?

    I am still so disgusted with FL!!! Is there a way to leave the state? Not that it is fair that you would have to uproot your family and leave an area you may love in other ways but it seems like a huge risk to take! What are your plans for juggling this?

    Or what about suing the state?
    Katie, mama to a pair of boys.

  8. #28
    celeste Guest

    Default RE: Does anyone do adoption as a first choice?

    Just a note about non-citizen adoptions, we are Canadians, living in the US, and you can adopt domestically, just not internationally.

    Your comment about not wanting to be seen as the nanny just made me HAVE to write. My husband is chinese, I am caucasian, and our daughter is mixed... her birthmom was specifically looking for an adoptive familiy that she would "fit in to", and although I sometimes get funny looks, my husband often gets comments about how much she resembles him!

    So you may want to look into domestic agencies, although there are many families looking to adopt blond, blue eyed babies, there are MANY, MANY birthparents looking for adoptive families that match their child-to-be's ethnicity... and in our case, our wait was very short - only five months from finishing the paperwork to having little Miss in the living room :)

    However this thread is of great interest to me as we always knew we would adopt, and now to our surprise, despite great precautions otherwise :) are expecting a baby boy - the old fashioned biological way - in about 8 more weeks.

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