Anyone else's toddler get easily frustrated?

[lisams]

DD gets frustrated so easily and it's driving me bonkers. For example, she'll want a blanket for her doll folded just so, and when she can't do it she flips. I try to help her but she either wants to do it herself or I just don't get how she wants it to go. I end up putting the blanket away, but lately it has been with almost everything. If a puzzle piece doesn't go in right on the second attempt she starts crying. I'm not sure what to do!! I've tried putting the harder things away, but sometimes a simple doll can make her upset because it's not doing what she wants (and I have no clue what she is trying to do).

Any suggestions or anyone else with a toddler like this? I know this is partly her personality, but oh my goodness please tell me it gets better.

Thanks!
Lisa

[LucyG]

Yes, yes, yes!! I don't have any answers, but my 18 month old DD is the same way. Today, she wanted to lift her doll stroller and CARRY it through the house. She kept bumping into things, and just totally lost it. I tried to help her, but she only became angrier. When this happens, she often does a little two-step as she screams. "Nonononononono!" is usually heard at a very loud level. I either try to remove the offending object when she is not looking, back off a few feet and let her cool down, or (if she is really hysterical) pick her up and hug until she calms down. I think it's just the nature of the age. My DD, at least, wants to try everything, and her desires exceed her capabilities in so many things still. She has gotten better about signing and saying "help" when she needs help, but even that doesn't always ease her frustrations. Sorry I can't offer any help, but I'm going through the same thing as you! My DD was a very easy, mild-tempered baby, so these toddler mood swings are a new experience for me!

[Chelsey333]

My 2 year old was very easy and mild until about 20 mos. Then he started getting frustrated at a lot of things. He has good days and bad days. Some days he will cry and throw himself on the floor just bec his truck fell of the couch. The only thing that helped me was teaching him to say help. But a lot of times he does it for things he doesn't need help with. Sometimes he gets upset when I don't understand what he is trying to say. If I say "what, say it again honey?" more than twice, look out! For me, it hasn't gotten better. We have good days and bad days. Some days he is so happy throughout the day, and other days he is so easily frustrated.

[KarenNYC]

Thank god it isn't just me! Ryan (he is almost 19 months) has become very whiny and tantrumy and it usually involves not getting his way, not being able to tell us what it is he wants or not being able to do what he is trying to do (a jigsaw puzzle or reaching a book or catching the dog etc...). He stomps his feet and cries and when I try to ask him to sue his words or show me what he wants and send him even further down the tantrum raod.

Have you found anything that has helped? I am trying to find some good parenting toddler types of books as I am out of ideas!

Karen

[hjdong]

Not that this is too helpful (I seem to be full of not very helpful suggestions today), but DS just grew out of this. I would love to say I did something to help, but I think I mostly survived it - nothing more. He went through this phase and as he got more capable and more verbal, he would only tantrum when he was tired. I won't say he never tantrums now, but it's very rare. It was about the same age as your DS and I would say it got better fairly quickly.

What I did do was mostly ignore him. When he started the true tantrum (I would try to avoid right up to the actual tantrum) I would say, "Let me know when you are finished," get out one of his favorite books, and make a huge point of reading it to my dogs (which still works when I'm trying to get him dressed in the morning).

HTH,

[Momof3Labs]

Not that different from Holly's approach (since a time-out is just the withdrawal of your attention), these sorts of tantrums draw a time-out warning around here. And an actual 1-2 minute time-out if they don't let up. Since we started that, Colin has gotten MUCH more reasonable. But more often than not, the tantrum is tied to him feeling crappy for some other reason - teething, tired, hungry, etc. - and if I address the underlying problem rather than trying to address the surface tantrum, we're all happier. But if none of that puts him in a better mood, I resort to time-outs.