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  1. #11
    Join Date
    Jun 2004
    Middleton, WI, USA.

    Default RE: Ok, is he too OLD for this stuff? Am I babying him?


    A lot of what the PP's have written makes great sense. I personally don't think you are "babying" Matthew either. You do what's best for him, and let the rest fall where it may...

    FWIW, here's how things went with Jackson...

    1) Crib: He never tried to escape and slept like a log in it. We moved him to a "big boy bed" at 2 1/2 because he is quite tall for his age, and he really got to be too long and too heavy to be in the crib any longer. I truly miss it (and miss my sleep :-))

    2) Highchair: If Matthew is pulled up to the table, and is comfortable, then keep on doing it. I miss the highchair... Jack got to be too tall for his highchair a few months after his 2nd birthday, and we moved him to a Cushie Booster at the table (in an armchair--very important deterrent to the Wandering Diner Syndrome!)

    3) Rocking Chair: We still have the glider in Jack's room to read stories at night. Matthew will let you know when he is tired of snuggle time (hopefully not for a long while!)

    4) Potty Training: If Matthew is not showing any interest in the potty, and he is hiding to poop, you are most likely right in that he is not ready. I know our pediatrician said at Jack's 3yr. check-up that it happens when it happens, and that trying to "advance" it will just backfire. Trust me--I work at a daycare, and I've seen the ill effects of overbearing potty-training parents. It's not pretty...

    Good luck to you! It seems that your "mommy instinct" is right on target!

    Mommy of Jackson 4/30/02

    Who's the Biggest Boy? It's Jackson![/img][/url]

  2. #12
    Join Date
    May 2003
    a tiny island in the middle of the sea

    Default RE: Ok, is he too OLD for this stuff? Am I babying him? DS is 22 months and sits like an angel in his highchair. I have no intention of moving him until he starts to resist or he gets too big. I think if you and your DS are content then you should just let it be.

    As for the rocking chair, maybe it's just me, but I think what you are doing right now sounds lovely. 5-10 minutes rocking in the dark probably makes your DS feel really good and also reassuring. There will come a time soon enough where your DS will want no cuddles at all and you will miss these days. Why stop early?
    DS 10, 5th grade
    DD 8, 3rd grade

  3. #13
    Join Date
    Jul 2002

    Default RE: Ok, is he too OLD for this stuff? Am I babying him?

    Her are my humble thoughts :-)

    1) Sleeping in a crib: DD is 2 1/2 and still sleeping in her crib. I really want to get her a "big girl" bed, but she sleeps so well in there and has never tried climbing out. Right now I'm with the "don't fix what isn't broken" camp.

    2) Highchair: I actually like having DD eat right at the table with us in her booster seat. She was doing fine in her high chair, but something about bringing her right to the table with us was nice.

    3) Rocking chair: I rock DD every night, so no help here :-)

    4) Potty training: When DD started doing this we got her a little potty to sit on while I was using the bathroom (it sounds like you already have one?) We also got a few books about using the potty. It was more like an introduction type thing for her. I've heard too many stories where the parents pushed the PT and it backfired, so I'd say introduce a few things to him and see how he does with it. I think you're on the right track with not trying to advance him until he's ready.

    Welcome to toddlerhood :-)

  4. #14
    muskiesusan is offline Platinum level (1000+ posts)
    Join Date
    Mar 2002

    Default RE: Ok, is he too OLD for this stuff? Am I babying him?

    1, 2 & 3-I wouldn't worry about changing anything until you either are preparing for a new baby or he starts to resists those items.

    4-I wouldn't push the potty training, but, you might want to get a chair just to introduce the idea. No pressure for him, but just tell him what it is and let him explore it to see how he reacts to it. Nick didn't potty train until the week he turned 3 and it was easy, so I am all about waiting until they are ready!

    Mom to Nick 10/01
    & Alex 04/04

  5. #15
    tigalig Guest

    Default RE: Ok, is he too OLD for this stuff? Am I babying him?

    If your ds was 5 and you had these issues, I might think your dh is right. I believe we rush our kids to grow up too fast and we only have ourselves to blame later.

    Crib: we moved ds because we were expecting our dd that year. He was 31 months old and he could have easily stayed in the crib for another year.

    Highchair: We moved him for the same reason as the crib. I had to hide it and buy a new cover for dd so he would never know, but he could have easily stayed in that for another year too. You can tell dh that he'll start climbing down from the chair/booster seat to show his maturity!

    Rocking chair: I still use ours (now in dd's room) with ds (almost four) when he wants to be rocked. What's the rush? I'm all for enjoying these times because someday, he won't let me hold him.

    Potty training: ds was trained by 21 mos. He was ready and it was all initiated by him. I would not push this at all. If you do, you might regret it.

    I remember having a number of discussions with dh about issues regarding child rearing and we finally went round and round so much that we agreed that I would be the one making the decisions since I'm the one who is with them most of the time. It took some coaxing to get the "reigns," but it beats arguing over things, particularly if you cannot agree on alot of it. At the very least, if you want to compromise, I would suggest to dh that you can try one change at a time and play it by ear. HTH!

  6. #16
    LucyG is offline Sapphire level (2000+ posts)
    Join Date
    Nov 2002

    Default RE: Ok, is he too OLD for this stuff? Am I babying him?

    Let's see . . .

    1. DD is still in a crib at 27 months, and we have no plans to move her in the near future. She knows where her big-girl bed is (in our current guest room), but has made no move to sleep on it, or even really climb on it.

    2. She sits in the highchair with it pulled up to the kitchen table (no tray). Our eating area is small, so a booster would probably take up less space. We do have one, but I like the fact that the high chair contains spills better. At restaurants, she usually likes to sit in a booster instead of a high chair now, or in the booth beside me or DH.

    3. Still rocking her and reading stories in the glider. This is my favorite time of the day, as well as DH's. I start the bedtime routine, and he finishes up with prayers and puts her in bed after they rock.

    4. I would be thrilled if she were ready to PT, but she doesn't seem to be. She has Dora panties, which she opts to wear from time to time. However, wetting them does not bother her. She is an obsessive flusher, and likes to sit on the potty and pretend to use it so she can flush! I'm trying to be very patient, as I know it will be better for all of us if we wait until she's really ready to start.

    I think you are doing fine![/img][/url]
    2 years and counting!

  7. #17
    Join Date
    Nov 2003

    Default RE: Ok, is he too OLD for this stuff? Am I babying him?

    Allison, I don't think you are babying him either! Here are my thoughts:

    1. Crib - I wanted to keep my girls in the crib until they were much older, but they climbed out at 25 and 21 months!

    2. High chair - as long as he likes the high chair, I would leave him in it!

    3. Rocking chair - I think that snuggling is so nice. He's still so little, enjoy it!

    4. Potty training - I'm a firm believer in waiting until they are ready. My oldest had just turned 4 when she starting training, and she did train very quickly. Up until then she just had no interest. When I asked if she wanted to sit on the potty she said "no"! What was I supposed to do? My youngest trained when she was a little over three. My friend just tried to train her 3 year old DS a few months ago. He clearly wasn't ready, even though he would announce to her when he was pooping, too. A couple of weeks ago he told her that he wanted to wear underwear and he's been in them ever since! I think he's had two or three accidents. He made the decision that he was ready and that was it!

    Don't question yourself, you are doing great! Matthew is only two, that's still a baby in my book! My DH and I often have different opinions on how things should be done, but we've worked them out and I've almost always managed to show him why I'm right! ;-)

  8. #18
    Join Date
    Mar 2002
    Ohio, United States.

    Default RE: Ok, is he too OLD for this stuff? Am I babying him?

    I would follow your DS's lead on these issues.

    #1 - My plan was to leave DS in his crib for as long as possible. Somewhere after 2.5, he decided he didn't want to sleep in his crib anymore and started asking to sleep in our guest beds.

    #2 - With the highchair, I wish he still wanted to use it at 2. He absolutely hated it, but in your case, I say if it's not broken, don't try to fix it.

    #3 - I have no experience with the rocking chair issue. We never rocked to sleep, but it would seem to me that if that is part of the routine, it would be really hard to get out of that. If it's bothering DH and he's the one who generally puts DS to bed, then I might defer to him on this one. I see nothing wrong with rocking, but it may be more of a DH issue than anything else. If he does want to eliminate it, I'd do it gradually - just less rocking each night. DS's big nighttime thing is books. We have to read or he can't go to sleep. Rocking may be Matthew's thing.

    #4 - I'd follow DS's lead here too. I messed up on this one. DS was ready at around 27 months and I wasn't ready to really commit to it. Now when I want him trained, he's no longer cooperative. So, watch the signs and actually follow them. I do think getting a potty chair or insert would be appropriate to get him used to the idea.

    Good luck.
    Mommy to Justin (13 years) & Ashlyn (8 years)

  9. #19
    mlewis Guest

    Default RE: Ok, is he too OLD for this stuff? Am I babying him?

    Well, I'm going to chime in and agree with all the PP.

    Crib - my DS is 23 months and is still very happy in his crib so I'm not even thinking about moving him yet.

    Highchair - DS is still happy in it (doesn't even know what a booster seat is!) although we're going to visit family in a couple of weeks and we did buy a booster seat to take with us so we may have trouble getting him back into the highchair when we get back.

    Rocking chair - I think it's great you can still rock him, and 5-10 minutes is not excessive!

    Potty training - my DS also will separate himself from us to have a BM, but we've gently tried to do the potty thing and he has absolutely no concept of what we're trying to get him to do!

    I think you're doing just great.

  10. #20
    missym's Avatar
    missym is offline Bargain Alerts forum moderator
    Join Date
    Jun 2003

    Default RE: Ok, is he too OLD for this stuff? Am I babying him?

    Our kiddos are still so little, I don't think you're babying him at all.

    1) If Gwen hadn't learned to climb out of her crib, we would have certainly kept her in it longer. Once they discover they can get up on their own, 3am visits to your bedside are inevitable.

    2) DD spurned the highchair at home ages ago and now sits in a booster at the table with us. However, she uses a highchair without complaint at the sitter.

    3) I agree with PP to treasure the cuddle time while you can get it!

    4) Pushing a child into potty learning is asking for trouble, in my opinion. DD also loves to flush and will sometimes sit on her potty chair, but otherwise isn't interested. As anxious as I am not to have 2 in diapers, I'm trying to be patient and wait 'til she's ready.

    Missy, mom to Gwen 03/03... and #2 due Sept 05!

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