3+ year old: too much peeing in pants

[toby]

DS is 3 years 4 months. He is very strong willed (is this the polite term?!)...

He started wearing underwear when he went to preschool in September. I will skip some of the horrors over the past 6 months involving poop, but we are now at the point where he will poop in the potty all the time and pee in the potty when he feels like it/when he remembers. He still wears a diaper at night.

Deep breath. Timed potty breaks, suggestions to go potty etc have become a battle of wills- I think that it has made it worse. He was mildly interested in the potty chart for a while, but he doesn't care that much. He does not mind being in wet pants. When he is naked he also sometimes pees in the potty and sometimes in the toilet. I have been through the naked for a week at home strategy as well as a billion other ones written about.

Lately I have backed off and try to not say anything other than to remind him to listen to his body. He continues to poop in the potty, pee in the potty once or twice a day and wet his pants 2-4 times. I am doing a fairly good job of keeping my cool, but I am feeling so angry and frustrated and helpless.

I am wondering about putting him in pull ups in the afternoon and telling him that if he would like to wear underwear, then he needs to go in the potty. My guess is that he won't care and that he will be wearing pull ups and peeing in his pants forever.

What would you do?? Thanks for listening.

[hbridge]

Okay, this may work for you. We too have a very strong willed child...

Try potty breaks every 3 hours or so. When he says "I don't have/want to go" resort to "bribery". We have a chocolate on the potty "rule". If DC sits on the potty there is chocolate available IF requested or offered. The last time we had a back slide it took about a week of offering chocolate every three hours for sitting on the potty before we were back on track. Now chocolate is available only upon request. For us, chocolate worked, there may be something more appropriate for your child...

Good luck....

[KrisM]

When I knew DS knew what to do, but just didn't seem to care, this is what I did.

I put him in underwear and pants and went to his favorite places. I loaded him up with liquid on the way. We'd go to Barnes and Noble to play with their trains. I'd tell him that if he kept his pants dry, we'd stay. If he peed in them, we would have to leave. He peed the first time and we left with him screaming (not so fun). The next day, we went back and he told me he had to go potty and he did and we stayed until he wanted to leave.

It took a few trips to fun places, but it worked for us.

[randomkid]

Now, THAT'S a good idea - I may just have to try that with my stubborn 3+yo DD!

[hellokitty]

Putting him in pull ups will just make it worse. I know it is a pain to have to clean the mess up all of the time, but from my experience and from all my friends' experience pull ups when they do this, just makes yours kids addicted to pull ups! I would suggest maybe a sticker chart or something. Every time he goes on the potty and his pants are still dry he gets a sticker, and then after x amt of stickers he can pick out a toy or something or go out for an ice cream cone, etc..